150 Ways to
Tell if You're Ghetto
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Amazon
Shawn Wayans, With Chris Spencer, With Suli McCullough
ISBN: 0440507936
Format: Paperback, 80pp
Pub. Date: July 1997
Publisher: Dell Publishing Company, Inc.
Shawn Wayans (star of the hit prime-time WB
Network Television show The Wayans Bros.), Chris Spencer
(host of the upcoming national late night talk show Vibe),
and Suli McCullough (up-and-coming comedian, actor, writer)
bring their lively brand of humor to the page in a book sure to
tickle city- and country-bound alike. More than a place, the
authors remind us, "ghetto" is a state of mind; "If Hillary
Clinton ever picked up Chelsea from school with rollers in her
hair...guess what? The First Lady be ghetto."
Among other ways to tell if you're ghetto:
You can read your haircut
You throw a pool party at the fire hydrant
You buy pagers to match your outfits
You go to church just to pick up women
Your fingernails are longer than your fingers
You have a car phone and no car
You take a bubble bath with dishwashing liquid
You get into a fistfight while you're pregnant
You missed the birth of your child because you were playing
Sega
You named your daughters after cars you can't afford |
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Skinny Women Are Evil: Notes of a Big Girl in a Small-Minded World
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Amazon
by Mo'Nique, Sherri A. McGee
ISBN: 0743464710
Format: Hardcover, 224pp
Pub. Date: April 2003
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Comedienne Mo'Nique, the bold, classy sitcom star, Queen of Comedy, and two-time
NAACP Image Award winner, is at it again. This time she proves once and for all
that Skinny Women Are Evil. Mo'Nique shares her tales of frustration in a world
designed for the skinny, and lets us in on the tricks and manipulation that
finally led her to declare the truth about the real weight-challenged. From
travel, exercise, and raising kids, to shopping, dining out, and sex, she
tackles the everyday things that make life tough for Fabulous and Thick (F.A.T.)
girls.
With Mo's handy Thin-O-Meter as a guide, you'll know immediately whether you're
dealing with a skinny evil woman whose goal is to control and change the F.A.T.,
or a cool thin one who's big at heart. As Mo'Nique puts it, if after two bites
of food she proclaims, "I'm stuffed," she's evil. If she asks if you're
pregnant, and you're not, then chances are she's evil.
Mo'Nique also discusses how family can impact the F.A.T. She describes in
hilarious detail how sibling rivalry takes the form of under-the-breath remarks.
Mo'Nique talks about how her grandmother forbade her to eat ice because, "it'll
make you fatter."
Ever wondered how to pick the best place for happy hour? Or how to skillfully
pack appetizers in your purse? The self-proclaimed culinary connoisseur answers
those important questions, and may change the way you dine or, perhaps, where.
After constantly finding frustration and insult with today's fashions, Mo'Nique
set her sights on making sure that the F.A.T. have options. So she created her
own fashion line and provides a list of designers that respect the curves. She
tells it like it is when talking about how F.A.T. love offers more than cushion
for the pushin'. She explains the exercise thing in terms BIG girls can relate
to, and believes that getting in shape shouldn't be full of frustration,
embarrassment, and pain.
The comedienne also tackles the trials of TUBBY travels. She asks how can the
F.A.T. truly "fly the friendly skies" if they're made to feel uncomfortable and
the subject of lawsuits?
Whether you tip the scales at a puny 100 pounds, or weigh in at a voluptuous
225, Skinny Women Are Evil is filled with stories and observations only this
comedy heavyweight can bring. So, sit back and get comfortable. After reading
Skinny Women Are Evil, you'll be singing the praises of FATTY girls, too! |
