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Angry Black Woman!


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Iyanla VanZant  On Her Show, Talked About The Angry Black Woman, Violence By Black Women On Other Black Women. A Black Mother Put Violence Upon Her Daughter Because Her Mother Abused Her.. Black Women Abused By Men Has Been A Topic On Her Show.  She Needs To Talk About Black Women Abused By Corrupt Preachers. Preachers Beating On Their Wives, Having Children With Mistresses And Killing Their Wives. I Read Where  Preacher"s  Wife And His Mistresses Were Fighting In Church.  Lot Of Reason Why, Black Women Are Angry..One, Black Women Rasing Children Alone..

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The question really is what do Black women, any of us really do with this anger?  Do we direct it inwards, and become self destructive to ourselves and our community; or do we take that energy and do something constructive?

Anger is not the problem it is natural reaction to the real problem we confront on a daily basis. 

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What I think Black women in America are experiencing more than anything is FRUSTRATION.

And that frustration has 2 main causes:

1. The constant feeling of insecurity because they don't feel Black men can protect them or provide for them.

2. The constantly feeling of being "less than" White women in terms of beautify and/or feminity.


As far as the "anger" goes......

Frustration releases itself in either anger or sadness.
Most Black women have learned that most peope don't care if they're sad so they've decided that anger generates a better response and gets more attention.

A White or Asian woman can sit in public and start crying and dozens of men and women of all races will come up to them asking them what's wrong.

A Black woman can start crying and people will ignore her and stare at her like she's crazy or a drug addict and assume negatives about her condition.
But of a Black woman starts cussing and getting loud...that gets everyone's attention and they start looking around at eachother trying to figure out "what happened" and try to calm her down.
Black women have learned this and many act accordingly.


I really feel sorry for the Black woman.
Atleast as a man, I believe God equipped most men with the physical and mental faculties to deal with the harshness of an unforgiving society but I don't believe most women of any race are equipped to deal with certain things that Black woman have been having to go through for hundreds of years.

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On 9/15/2016 at 10:56 AM, Queen X said:

Black women should be angry. They have been used and sh___td on enough to be angry.

You, Pioneer and Troy have a real grasp of the situation, as opposed to the black women are happy, confident, and carefree claim which is nothing more than a lot of superficial blather.  Black women, as a whole, have never been rewarded for the strength, endurance, patience and inner beauty they have personified since day one in America. They remain in the shadow of white women who are born with their elevated status.  

 

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LOL This from sara who, in her post that preceded the one above, parroted what I said on another thread about how confident and unflappable black women were.  A claim to which Troy responded saying, in effect, that a lot of black women he'd met were laughing on the outside and crying on the inside. Upon considering that his was a more compassionate assessment of many black women like Leslie Jones, I modified my opinion, also appreciating what Pioneer had to say in the process. (As sara, herself, did in trying to make her point through Pioneer's words. Co-opting what others say or write is what ol shallow sara has to resort to since she's not an original thinker.) 

Not surprising that the dysfunctional sara who is stuck in a state of denial, who can't bring herself to accept that the SOUTH side of Chicago has a high murder rate, who can't admit the she haunts this forum desperately seeking validation, who can't acknowledge anything that exposes the truth about her pathological lying, is incapable of conceding that her "happiness" stems from an aberration that places her in the minority, not the majority.  Instead she passes flawed judgment on black women who haven't dealt with their frustration by becoming lesbians like she did in seeking escape from  the bitter frustration of her past that has made her the maladjusted geek she is in the present. :lol:.

The simple one-sentence post by Queen X is more cogent than sara's drawn out "theory" which is nothing but a re-hash of what everybody, including harry brown, had already implied, and the fact that sara isn't able to recognize that there is nothing profound about her conclusions, is just another indication of how clueless her inflated ego has made her.

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Sara

So, Mr. "I'm average-looking," don't pity sistahs; pity the bear and feel sorry for yourself.

Some would even consider my looks BELOW average.
There's a reason why I'm not too quick to show my pictures all over the internet...lol.

Get outta here with that "sistaz thinking they're all that" nonsense.
Anybody over 25 KNOWS that most people who walk around talking about how good they look or how sexy they are do this to compensate for their lack of confidence.
How many rich people have you seen running around flashing money and talking about how much money they make or have?
That's what POOR people do in order to impress others and compensate for their low opinion of themselves.
How many people with doctorate degrees stand around arguing with people and telling them how smart and capable they are as a person?

If  Black women in America were so happy with themselves and the way they looked they wouldn't spend so much time and even more money straightening their hair and even dyeing their hair blond clearly in an attempt to look like White women.
Now I have to admit that it's not all their fault.
Many Black men love the way White women look and find them more attractive than Black women. Which is one of the reasons so many Black men...even many of the so-called "conscious" and "pro Black" Black men love "red bones" or very light skinned Black women. It's as closest they can get to a White woman without actually saying they are with one.  So many Black women try to imitate the appearance of White women in order to attract Black men who they know or believe find them attractive.

Black women spend more money on getting their hair and nails done than any other woman in this nation. 
Black women (and Black men too for that matter) spend more of their income on clothes, shoes, perfumes, jewelry and other "accessories" than other races of women PER CAPITA.  
When a person doesn't like the way they look naturally...they buy "accessories" hoping that people will see those things as an extention of their person and in the process make themselves more appealing.



Now obviously I'm not talking about all Black women.  Many are healthy and happy with themselves and most Black women from Africa that I've met have extremely high self esteem...even more so than White or Asian women.
But a large percentage of Black women in America DO have self esteem issues and are clearly frustrated living in a society that constantly holds the OPPOSITE of how they look as the epitome of feminine beauty.....not to mention the state of Black men who have our own issues of not being able to provide and protect Black women as we should right now.


Also, there's more at play when it comes to a woman's self esteem than how she sees herself in terms of looks and beauty.
A person can see themselves as very attractive physically but WORTHLESS morally.
How many times have you heard Black men and women say "they ain't shit" when speaking of themselves?
Or see themselves as gangsta....or criminal.....or see themselves and other Black people as "wicked" and no good or children of Cain?

Black people in America in general...which includes Black women....suffer from confidence and self esteem issues not only in terms of how they look but also in terms of morality as many feel they are "cursed" or just not meant to succeed in life.

Talk is cheap, actions speak louder than words and the behavior of Black men AND women in America tell the world how low many think of themselves.

 


Cynique

You're right that Black women have never been accurately rewarded for their strength and other positive attributes. It's clearly because of the historically patriarchal focus on a woman's worth being decided based on her looks and femininity rather than her strength and intelligence.

I have to admit that even in my own personal life...when I look for a woman I don't look for "intelligence" or "strength" but looks, femininity, and social skills.
Although most of it is cultural, I also believe a large percentage of it is just inborn and natural to human beings to attribute strength (both physical and inner) to men and beauty to women.


 

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Sara

My statements aren't arrived from ONLY my personal experiences or who I hang around.

I'm not the only Black man in the Black community nor are the Black women I've been with the ONLY Black women. Infact, most of the Black women I tend to be with aren't native to America anyway but come from the Carribean or African continent or their parents do, so the vast majority of them haven't been influenced as much by the American media and tend to have very high self esteem and a certain amount of confidence but still maintain a feminine demeanor.

It would be pretty naive of me or anyone else to use their own personal situation as a barometer for what's happening in Black America.

When I speak on issues affecting Black America I take as much of the general "norm" into account as necessary for accuracy.

 

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