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Cynique

Calling all amateur psychiatrists

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21 hours ago, Delano said:

Perhaps it is related to your being comfortable critiquing and psychoanalysing the men. Which you don't do with Mel.

You are a better writer than all of the men here. You treat men on the  forum the way men treat women in the world. It's not that you don't take men seriously. Its just you feel that the writing reflects half baked ideas.

 @DelWHO are you talking about?  Me? Or Troy?  

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@Mel Hopkins if you go back through tje exchanges at various points you, me , Cynique and Troy. Have had an emotional response to what Pioneer has written. Also each of us has questioned his thought process. Which does not speak to non attachment.  You Troy and myself have begrudgingly agreed with Pioneer. At a certain point I decided to stop having an emotional response. 

 

@Mel Hopkins if my words haven't made you question your response.  i can repost some previous post that demonstrate my opinion.

1 hour ago, Cynique said:

 @DelWHO are you talking about?  Me? Or Troy?  

You. 

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3 hours ago, Delano said:

 if my words haven't made you question your response.  i can repost some previous post that demonstrate my opinion

 

@Delano yes, that would be helpful. 

 

 

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I don't think you folks know that Pioneer came and went on this board.  He showed up one day and stayed around for a while, and then left.  Later after a long hiatus, he  suddenly reappeared.  Even during his first  "term", he and i constantly argued. When he came back, there was truce but we gradually began to clash again.

 

If what he provokes in me can be described as an emotion (?),  irritation would be what comes to mind because so much of what he says strikes me as absurd, or inaccurate, or dogmatic. And this is compounded by how he thinks he's never wrong! At some point, this has become a knee-jerk reaction because as soon as he posts something, i know i'm going to disagree with it, -  and I usually do. And, of course, all of this is exacerbated by my argumentive personality. I've come to the conclusion that he and i are  like oil and water; we just don't mix.  As Mel previously noted, some people have a natural aversion to each other. Maybe he and i had a contentious relationship in another life.  Who knows? Who cares?

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I don't think I have an emotion response to Pioneers posts.  When I agree with him it is not begrudging either.  In fact I often feel, as I've said before, I can relate to Pioneer because I've shared many of the opinion he hold -- even the one on race.

 

@Delano I think you may be projecting your relationship with Pioneer onto others.  At least in my case you are not seeing it the way I do.

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@Mel Hopkins, I think you dropped the Buddhism bomb. Attachment. 

 

I cannot speak for anyone else, but I have found in the past that when I have too much of a stake in the outcome of a conversation, I become too passionate...I want to be right, I want the world to revolve around my views. I am not open to possibility. 

 

No matter WHAT I discuss on ANY forum or in person, no matter what I express, I am NOT attached to it, no matter what I say about my feelings on a topic. That is why I do not get upset with anyone who has a different view or experience and eventually go silent when folks cannot consider another view on a topic. I don't want anyone to "take my side" but to just consider ideas. Because at the end of the day, my stance is, we could ALL be wrong about our thoughts/ideas/opinions, even, dare I say, our observations that we define a certain way. Our observations in and of themselves may not be wrong, but our interpretation of what we observe could be 100% wrong.

 

There could be 6 billion separate views of life and existence, and they could ALL be wrong because we have yet, as a human species, to advance to the point of understanding what we THINK we are looking at. So while I enjoy discussions about things and I share what I THINK I know, I am not attached to anything. I leave myself forever open to possibility. 

 

Possibility. That is the crux of it. So many are attached to their view of the world and how they've defined their observation that they cannot consider possibility.

 

For example, I've pondered the changes in weather/climate, etc., and have not come away with this doom and gloom that is pushed by the scientific community and something that needs to be fixed. Just like we go through seasons in a year--winter, spring, summer, fall--what IF the planet is merely going through a couple millennia long season? What if what we think is some terrible warming that could destroy everything on Earth is merely the planet's normal shift into Summer that will last for about 2,000 years? I am not saying for sure that is what it is, but because we are so stuck on what we've decided the observation means, we cannot consider other possible reasons for what we are observing that does not include doom and gloom.

 

Love your assessment on attachment. It brought up a lot that I often meditate on. I detach when I see I am communicating with those who are attached to their way of seeing things, or have decided that their conclusions on their observations are the ONLY conclusion that can be derived from an observation or experience. That is why you will rarely if ever hear/read me use the words, "you are wrong" no matter if I think they COULD be. I am more inclined to ask, "Could you be wrong?" If someone said to me they are going to walk off a mountain because gravity doesn't exist, to be frank, unless it is my child, I am not arguing with grown folks who think the way they see is the ONLY way. I'll merely ask them, after a bit of discussion to gauge how they came to their conclusion (can't let them go out without at least speaking on gravity), if they can, to let me know how it goes when they've tried it. Cause at the end of the day, maybe they've developed a way to fly that I am unaware of. So who am I to tell them they are wrong?  LOL. 

 

:: closing eyes and crossing legs :: I detach myself from my opinions, knowledge, information, facts and beliefs. Ommmmmm. Namaste...

 

 

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19 minutes ago, zaji said:

 

:: closing eyes and crossing legs :: I detach myself from my opinions, knowledge, information, facts and beliefs. Ommmmmm. Namaste...


Yes, Yes, Yes,! (I'm over here giggling -because I have to meditate on this All.The.Time. ) :)

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We 3 women here all seem to be on the same page.  My inner-narrative is constantly prompting me to exercise my 3rd eye, and to make sure i'm seeing what i'm seeing, and hearing what i'm hearing.  The ego can be a capricious filter.    

 

Zen is the key to my inner sanctum. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

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On 10/02/2018 at 9:23 AM, Troy said:

I don't think I have an emotion response to Pioneers posts.  When I agree with him it is not begrudging either.  In fact I often feel, as I've said before, I can relate to Pioneer because I've shared many of the opinion he hold -- even the one on race.

 

@Delano I think you may be projecting your relationship with Pioneer onto others.  At least in my case you are not seeing it the way I do.

Ok Troy 

 

I am focusing more on awareness and my reaction. So that I cam freely agree or disagree with a topic. And not be influenced by the personal dynamic 

it is a work in progress. 

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10 hours ago, Cynique said:

We 3 women here all seem to be on the same page.  My inner-narrative is constantly prompting me to exercise my 3rd eye, and to make sure i'm seeing what i'm seeing, and hearing what i'm hearing.  The ego can be a capricious filter.    

 

Zen is the key to my inner sanctum. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

 

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo  - Yes, @Cynique . This just reminded me that five years ago I would chant every day. I was wondering what was different about my life then but I noticed a lot of things changing. I may have to revisit this practice.  

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Cynique

 

 

So I didn't reverse myself and agree with you.


You only agree with me when you DON'T consciously realize it...lol.
Once it has been brought to your attention (usually by me) then you'll go out of your way to CHANGE your position and disagree.

 

 

 

 

I don't think you folks know that Pioneer came and went on this board. He showed up one day and stayed around for a while, and then left. Later after a long hiatus, he suddenly reappeared. Even during his first "term", he and i constantly argued. When he came back, there was truce but we gradually began to clash again.


Lol....
For a person who could "care less" about my presence you sure do keep up with MY comings and goings.

There was no "truce" between us because I never took you serious enough to fight with.
People like you don't make formidable opponents because you don't have any solid positions nor do you have any serious diagreements; you just like to push buttons and enjoy the emotions it brings out of people.

The only reason you stopped squabbling with me was because you had your hands full with Sara. As soon as she was gone.....you turned your flashing eyes back towards me and started licking your fangs, lol.

 

 

 



If what he provokes in me can be described as an emotion (?), irritation would be what comes to mind because so much of what he says strikes me as absurd, or inaccurate, or dogmatic. And this is compounded by how he thinks he's never wrong! At some point, this has become a knee-jerk reaction because as soon as he posts something, i know i'm going to disagree with it, - and I usually do. And, of course, all of this is exacerbated by my argumentive personality. I've come to the conclusion that he and i are like oil and water; we just don't mix. As Mel previously noted, some people have a natural aversion to each other. Maybe he and i had a contentious relationship in another life. Who knows? Who cares?


YOU care.....lol.

Which is why I've stated CLEARLY and consistently through out this thread that I suspect your problem is:

1. You see my presence as a threat to your status here.
2. You have a degree of attraction towards me and enjoy the attention you get from our quarrels.

I stand by that assessment until it is proven otherwise

Yes, we may be like oil and water......but I'm the oil because I always come out on top, lol.

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20 hours ago, Mel Hopkins said:

Yes, Yes, Yes,! (I'm over here giggling -because I have to meditate on this All.The.Time. ) 

 

@Mel Hopkins, I'm giggling right along with you. 

 

19 hours ago, Cynique said:

We 3 women here all seem to be on the same page.  My inner-narrative is constantly prompting me to exercise my 3rd eye, and to make sure i'm seeing what i'm seeing, and hearing what i'm hearing.  The ego can be a capricious filter.    

 

Yes @Cynique. Ego can catch us unaware at times. I make it a point to attempt awareness of when my conversations are all about my ego, rather than finding truth. Some folks think we are trying to find truth, desiring to reveal truth to others, when in fact, they are just full of ego and trying to be right. 

 

The worst part is when an individual finds a little bit of information without knowing the fullness of a thing (or using no critical and unique thinking) and then they are off and running with the I-know-I'm-right attitude. And not from a humble place of so called knowing, but from a boastful place, a place of intellectual superiority. If I have to boast about knowledge I believe I have, then I need to question myself as to whether that knowledge is true and not just something I'm using to pretend I'm better informed than others and therefore above them. Truth does not require me to fight for it. It can stand on its own whether someone wishes to see it or not. Truth also doesn't require me to be angry and overly passionate on its behalf, simply because someone doesn't see it. My job is to drop seed and keep it moving. I try to leave my ego at the door whenever I am aware of its attempts at infiltration. Third eye gotta stay open!! 

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3 hours ago, zaji said:

 

Yes @Cynique. Ego can catch us unaware at times. I make it a point to attempt awareness of when my conversations are all about my ego, rather than finding truth. Some folks think we are trying to find truth, desiring to reveal truth to others, when in fact, they are just full of ego and trying to be right

So true.  I had that experience here more than once.

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@zajii really appreciate your insight and clarity, and  how you are able to keep yourself in perspective. Some of the things you say are like shoes that fit my feet.  i am not deluded about how flawed i am and that is my salvation. I am on a truth seeking mission, myself, and the one truth i've learned is how elusive yet constant the truth is and how the journey supercedes the destination.  i really appreciate having you on this board to keep me in check by virtue of what i gain from the thoughts you share.  

 

@Pioneer1Did you read Zaji's above post.  You could take some lessons from this.  Your ego and your imagination are over the the top. A threat you are not. That's something you have imprinted on your psych, in order to feel good about yourself. Why you think that you are anymore riveting than Troy or Del, is beyond me. Most of your long posts i don't even finish reading. i categorize you as a certain type.  i've encountered males like you from time to time all my life and they've always turned me off.  And, lo behold, one of these types turns up on this board in the person of a deluded boring know-it-all.  

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On 11/02/2018 at 7:47 AM, Cynique said:

We 3 women here all seem to be on the same page.  My inner-narrative is constantly prompting me to exercise my 3rd eye, and to make sure i'm seeing what i'm seeing, and hearing what i'm hearing.  The ego can be a capricious filter.    

 

Zen is the key to my inner sanctum. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

It would appear so. 

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On 31/01/2018 at 4:51 AM, Cynique said:

is remarkably objective and very smart! He and I don't bite our tongues around each other and often disagree; i don't think we ever fully resolved our mansplaining smack-down.

@Troy perhaps not to @Cynique satisfaction. 

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On 11/02/2018 at 7:47 AM, Cynique said:

My inner-narrative is constantly prompting me to exercise my 3rd eye, and to make sure i'm seeing what i'm seeing, and hearing what i'm hearing.  The ego can be a capricious filter

In deed.

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Incidentally, Troy and i did pretty much accept our "mansplaining" debate as a "draw", when he reluctantly accepted the Oxford Dictionary of the English Language's  inclusion of this word in its dictionary,  as a legitimate alternative to Merriam Webster Dictionary's omission of the word. 

 

 

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Actually @Cynique our mansplaining debate was not a draw. Given the fact that mansplaining is in the Oxford Dictionary, I'm forced to accept it as a word. Now I don't have to like it, and I'm really not a fan of it, but if the English say it is a word, it is a word.

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How about that?   Someone who admits he was in error.  I'm sure Del could parse Troy's reasoning  ad infinitum, and Pioneer would have little empathy for him, but "in my opinion" Troy's admission was a sign of good character. B) 

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Cynique
 

How about that? Someone who admits he was in error. I'm sure Del could parse Troy's reasoning ad infinitum, and Pioneer would have little empathy for him, but "in my opinion" Troy's admission was a sign of good character.


Yeah, yeah, yeah........

The only reason you're praising Troy is because he's the Administrator.
If he was a man with the same status as me or Del you'd be picking needless argument's with HIM TOO like you do with 90% of everyone else who comes on this board.
...like you TRIED to do with Zaji but she was smart enough not to take the bait.
....like you'd be doing with Mel or Del if I weren't here, lol.


Since admitting that one is wrong is a sign of "good character" then when will YOU show some "good character" and admit you were wrong about:

1. Science NEVER being espoused to religion....after I showed you that sometimes they are.

2. There being multiple races.....if you now believe there is only one.

 

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@Pioneer1 don't even try it Brother. You, and everybody else who posts here knows, my admin role is limited to removing trolls, keeping the software and hardware working, and general administration. 

 

Saying, "The only reason you're praising Troy is because he's the Administrator," is not just false, but a pure desperation move on your part -- beneath even you... or so I thought :lol:

 

 

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@Pioneer1Everything you said is nothing but a failed attempt to make yourself look good.  i never tried to pick fights with Mel or Zaji because i admire and respect both of them and i adore Troy and Del. Plus, everybody on this board spars with each other.  

 

 And, unlike you, when intelligent reasonable arguments are presented i don't stubbornly cling to opinionated trumped-up theories rather than at least keep an open mind. As far as science espousing religion, the far-fetched statement you were "pretty sure" about, was definitively dismissed by Mel!  As far as race is concerned, i settled on the scientific findings and societal circumstances  that made the most sense to me.  If that offends you,  then good!

 

And i don't need to respond to your petty accusation about Troy.  He said it all in the below response to your sulking.

10 hours ago, Troy said:

Saying, "The only reason Cynique is praising Troy is because he's the Administrator," is not just false, but a pure desperation move on your part -- beneath even you... or so I thought

 

You declaring  that my not agreeing with you is an indication of my having bad character is ludicrous and exposes you as the needy validation freak that you are.  It's easy to disagree with somebody who's a wanna-be oracle.  And why do you care if i don't agree with all of your spouting?   It makes me no difference whether you agree with me.   If you had good character you would stop looking upon yourself as infallible.  

 

It really wasn't necessary for me to even respond to your transparent self-serving litany, because it stood alone as a reason for my aversion to you. But just in case you didn't read the post below when you were doing all of your selective quoting, these are my sentiments. 

On 2/11/2018 at 1:53 PM, Cynique said:

i categorize you(Pioneer) as a certain type.  i've encountered males like you from time to time all my life and they've always turned me off.  And, lo behold, one of these types turns up on this board in the person of a deluded boring know-it-all.  

 

Nuff said.

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Troy

even try it Brother. You, and everybody else who posts here knows, my admin role is limited to removing trolls, keeping the software and hardware working, and general administration.

Saying, "The only reason you're praising Troy is because he's the Administrator," is not just false, but a pure desperation move on your part -- beneath even you... or so I thought


Desperation?????
Beneath even me????

I'm not the one going around stirring up trouble.
Infact, I'm the one who tried to make peace between Cynique and Sara after Cynique's repeated provocations.  And speaking of Sara......

If you'll notice the ONLY time Cynique was half-way civil towards me was when Sara was here and she needed all the allies she could get....lol.


 

 


Cynique

 

i never tried to pick fights with Mel or Zaji because i admire and respect both of them

 

Oh really????

Well HERE YOU ARE attacking Zaji simply for agreeing with me:

"Doeth the lady protest too much? i can see how Troy might get the "wrong" impression since you seldom agree with him, and never challenge Pioneer because you 2 are on the same page and reinforce each other's views."


"Because zaji is invariably in lock step with him, i now have my suspicions, and while she is watching me, i am watching her. It's too bad that Pioneer is oblivious to all of all of the admonitions and advice she offers, - her stream of conscious monologues that mesmerize us even as she has lapses where she doesn't practices what she preaches... But, hey, nobody's perfect!"
 

https://aalbc.com/tc/topic/4990-the-problem-of-identifying-ourselves-based-upon-whites-concept-of-race/?page=2

 



And HERE YOU ARE attacking Del simply for agreeing with me:

"
I can't believe anybody would consider Pioneer a role model when it comes to being open-minded. Does this mean you are now more receptive to Troy's POV on climate change? Or does Pioneer's lack of open-mindness inspire you to not be that way? Or is it because his opinionated pontificating exposes you to points of view you have no problem swallowing? Or is it because you empathize with him for not conceding to Troy? Since you have confessed that you are trying to "improve" yourself, is this because you have decided to be a more tolerant person - or because you didn't realize that you weren't a tolerant person? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh?

Just curious about your mid-life transformation/epiphany. Me, i'm too old to change. Which is why i can't resist taking pot shots at Pioneer. i guess i should congratulate him on acquiring 2 new choir members for his preaching"


https://aalbc.com/tc/topic/5005-bringing-fire/?page=1

 


But I guess those aren't your words.
I guess I just made up all those quotes of you attempting to humiliate people simply for agreeing with me.....lol.

 

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@Pioneer1 That's your version of things. I never considered you an ally in my feud with Sara.  Why would I? You had no influence over anything. You were nothing but a spectator.  You, Troy and Del were who wanted me to end my smack-down with Sara, but i kept things going because I was fired up.  When Troy wanted to ban her, i asked  him to let her stay. 

 

That quote you printed about zaji was not me trying to pick a fight with her.  That's your interpretation.   It was a wry observation which i felt free to make because i don't think zaji expects people here to treat her with kid gloves.  She can hold her own,  which is why she made reference to "bringing the fire". I tend to think that she didn't respond to my gibe because she has enough self-awareness to realize that she had, indeed,  written a lengthy post in making her point which you weren't the subject of; Troy was.  Or was i the one who originally said zaji was observing us.  When i told zaji i was a cynic in another exchange, she assured me that this was no problem because cynicism was needed when it came to keeping people grounded.  That's why i like her because she is confident enough to be broadminded, and intuitive enough to understand the person behind the words.  i think we get each other.  The long argument about the Viola Davis picture on TIME's cover is when the rift between you and me began.  

 

 As for my cross-examination of Del, who had  always been at odds with you, he responded to me and explained why he had done an about-face.  I thanked him for his "heart-felt" sentiments because i was impressed with his sincerity.  On another occasion, he explained something  about which i could take heed.  He had figured out that it's a waste of time to argue with you.  

 

You blow all this smoke in an attempt to obscure and justify your insult to Troy.  The whole gist of you petulance was that his being honest and admitting that he was wrong  was not a sign of good character.  Your determination that my compliment was just an attempt on my part to suck up to him, really shows your true colors.  You couldn't stomach that he was being praised for having the integrity to concede a point, something you don't have the guts to do. 

 

No, you didn't make up all those quotes.  You simply did what you always do:  cherry-pick to make yourself look good.  

 

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Cynique
 

Quote

 

That's your version of things. I never considered you an ally in my feud with Sara. Why would I? You had no influence over anything. You were nothing but a spectator. You, Troy and Del were who wanted me to end my smack-down with Sara, but i kept things going because I was fired up. When Troy wanted to ban her, i asked him to let her stay.

That quote you printed about zaji was not me trying to pick a fight with her. That's your interpretation. It was a wry observation which i felt free to make because i don't think zaji expects people here to treat her with kid gloves. She can hold her own, which is why she made reference to "bringing the fire". I tend to think that she didn't respond to my gibe because she has enough self-awareness to realize that she had, indeed, written a lengthy post in making her point which you weren't the subject of; Troy was. Or was i the one who originally said zaji was observing us. When i told zaji i was a cynic in another exchange, she assured me that this was no problem because cynicism was needed when it came to keeping people grounded. That's why i like her because she is confident enough to be broadminded, and intuitive enough to understand the person behind the words. i think we get each other. The long argument about the Viola Davis picture on TIME's cover is when the rift between you and me began.

As for my cross-examination of Del, who had always been at odds with you, he responded to me and explained why he had done an about-face. I thanked him for his "heart-felt" sentiments because i was impressed with his sincerity. On another occasion, he explained something about which i could take heed. He had figured out that it's a waste of time to argue with you.

 

 

Translation:

"
:unsure: Oh....that..??

Oh....uh...well....see..no I wasn't trying to humiliate or belittle them.....
No....see....uh....what I MEANT to do when I said all that was see....well...wha had happened was.....you and me was arguing over red lipstick...and see....THEN.....Zaji had said something and I wasn't sure what she had said...... and see...THEN Del had said something and then...yeah..but ..now we all straight".


 Lol.


 

No, you didn't make up all those quotes. You simply did what you always do: cherry-pick to make yourself look good.


Lol, if my quoting you makes me look good....what does that say about YOU?

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@Pioneer1Bottom line, you were wrong in saying that the only reason i said Troy had good character was because he was the administrator. Everything you brought up after that was your attempt to draw attention away from your petty remark.  

 

if you're expecting me to say that i was all wrong and you are all right, you should know better.  And it comes as no surprise to me that you cling to the idea that you can do no wrong.   And so it goes. 

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