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Bisexuality and Sexual Confusion 101

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This thread was started to continue the conversation I was having with Delano in another thread but obviously anyone interested can comment.

The context of this thread can be found in here:



1) First, there are 4 MAIN sexual orientation types:

1. Heterosexual -those attracted to the opposite sex
2. Homosexual -those attracted to the same sex
3. Bisexual -those attracted to both the same and opposite sex
4. Asexual -those who aren't attracted to either.

Got me?

2. Sexual orientation is NOT fluid.
It's stationary....hardwired pretty much from birth

With me so far?

3. You said that sexuality is fluid and that set off an alarm with me.
Because if a person is bisexual it may appear to be fluid TO THEM because THEIR sexuality contantly switches back and forth between the sexes.

A bisexual man may THINK he's straight and have a wife or girlfiend, but because he also likes men he may one day meet a man who he falls in love with and leaves the woman to get with this man.

If he's ignorant on bi-sexuality, he may think he TURNED gay.

Or he may THINK he's gay and have a boyfriend, but one day run into a woman who is so captivating that she pulls him in and he starts kicking it with her.

Again, if he's ignorant on the laws of bi-sexuality, he may think he TURNED straight.

But this is not fluidity, this is a bisexual acting out his natural impulses because he likes BOTH sexes although he may have been ignorant of his orientation.

With me so far?

I'm not asking if you agree or not....just...do you UNDERSTAND what I'm saying so far?


4. As I said, a person who is bisexual and ignorant of this fact may BELIEVE that sexuality is fluid because of HIS/HER own experiences....and there by PROJECT that same belief on others.

Which is why I told YOU that if YOU are bisexual...not saying you are or not...but IF you are then ofcourse it may seem to you that a man can "sway" another man by conversation or other means.
If you've done it or had it happen to you you believe it can happen to any man.

However, as I've said sexuality is pretty much set and hardwired.
This is why no matter how good the conversation or how much trust is achieved, no man will entice a STRAIGHT man to turn gay any more than he will entice a GAY man to turn straight.

It took me many years to learn this lesson during my silly attempts to "turn" lesbian women I found attractive straight.....lol.

My overall point is, most straight people and solidly homosexual people know and understand this.
But I doubt that most BISEXUALS do....since THEIR sexuality appears fluid as their attraction bounces back and forth between men and women they may assume and project their reality on others.

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Well what do you call a man that hangs out with another man who is in love with him. But that man is ignorant to that fact, Pioneer.

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Well what do you call a man that hangs out with another man who is in love with him. But that man is ignorant to that fact, Pioneer.

If the man who is in love is named Delano.....then I'd probably call that man Pioneer, lol.

And if Pioneer is ignorant to that fact, perhaps he should be KEPT that way by Delano keeping his feelings to himself....lol.

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In another thread you said:

Why not post the story in the new thread as well since that is what started the conversation. And it will give context to your statement. You said if some dude made a move on you it would end in violence. Why can't you just say you are not interested. And why couldn't you tell that guy you weren't interested. Sounds like the Fight or flight response. Which is the result of a perceived threat. Why do you feel threatened by homosexuality? Is cutting to close to the bone?



First, I thought about posting the story here but it seemed a little akward because I'd have to post the story as well as our responses to it.
Perhaps Troy is able to do it, but for me it would be too "sloppy" as I don't have the tools to edit the posts properly.

There's a simple reason I didn't tell my Asian friend that I wasn't interested in him, HE DIDN'T ASK....lol.
Perhaps YOU consider someone who constantly seeks your conversation and loves talking to you as being "in love" with you...I don't.
I've had a couple women in love (atleast they claimed they were) with me before and how they behaved towards me were totally different from his.

Again, as I've said several times.....I detected absolutely nothing gay or even effeminate about him what so ever. I have to admit that his constantly craving my conversation was a little off putting, but other than that I didn't detect any sensual desires coming from him.

As a man, I know how insulted I'd be if a cat I was chilling with all of a sudden broke out and said,
"You KNOW I ain't gay right.....so don't think I like you.
But uhhh....are you in love with me??".

I'd be like WTF....lol.

So why would I do that to someone else?



As far as a dude making a move on me becoming violent..............

I've had men hit on me before, but it didn't end in violence because it didn't become physical.  If a man just gave me the eye, or tried to start some crazy-talk with me it's annoying but it wouldn't make me become violent. However if a man were to try to grab my hand or feel on me THAT would bring an almost involuntary retaliatory response.
Part of it would be a natural reflex out of disgust, but also as a deterent to prevent them from going further.

Homosexuality itself isn't threatening.  I recognize it as a fact of nature.
I don't completely understand it.....like I don't completely understand how a woman feels.
But I accept it.

However men are men and tend to be aggressive with their object of attraction  whether they are heterosexual OR homosexual and just like women have to be (or should be) CLEAR to men that they aren't interested so that men don't take it further, a man should be the same with with a gay man.

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Here's your post Pioneer. 



On 2017-5-31 at 10:35 AM, Pioneer1 said:


Come on man, you know "white Freudian psychology" don't apply to brothers.....lol.

From what I've observed....
If a White dude is always ranting and raving about homosexuality, chances are he IS a homosexual.
If a Black man is doing it, he may have his reasons but being gay usually ain't one of them...lol.

But at any rate......
I wasn't trying to bust on the gays or demonize them, just pointing out how fond he seemed to be of my company even though I didn't dectect any "sweetness" about him what so ever.
This was the WestCoast and there were plenty of openly gay men frequenting that Starbucks but I never saw him talking to them....or any other man....or any woman!

From the time I saw him and the years I was there, besides myself I can count on ONE HAND the number of people I've seen him really interact with on a social level.

Your asking did we go out on a date reminded me of something else that was funny NOW but was very akward at the time.....

I started kicking it with a young lady out there and I would bring HER to the Starbucks from time to time.
He knew I often came there to meet women so if he happened to see me with a female he'd back off or sit in a corner somewhere and if by some chance the woman happened to leave before I did he'd catch me by myself and start running his mouth.
For some reason....I'm still not sure why.....I told him it was OK to sit with us when he saw us because I "had her" already so he wouldn't be considered in the way....lol.

What did I have to do THAT for???

Dude would come and just sit and watch us talk and after about a minute of silence....he'd talk ONLY TO ME!
If she'd ask him a question, he'd answer casually.....but then got quiet again.
No type of conversation with her what so ever.....lol....damn.
She was a nice girl so for a few encounters she'd TRY to converse with him but he'd turn so red and funny faced that she'd get freaked out and leave him alone.

((shakes head))

This happened for nearly 2 weeks to the point that she insisted that we no longer go to that Starbucks because of that "creepy guy".

I guess I didn't consider him creepy and liked talking to him because he was one of the few Asians who's willing to talk openly about race and politics with a Black man and he'd go all in about how Asians saw Black people and what his parents said ect...


It's true that some gay men do get married, but still.........

You can kind of tell if a person (straight female or gay male) has some "feelings" for you, even if they don't say it.
It's almost intuitive.

Homeboy wasn't on me like that, he genuinely just liked to talk talk and talk some more.

Now he may have been A-SEXUAL.
I've met quite a few people who fit into that category where they didn't like either sex.

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