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I try to speak from experience. Being raised by a single Nubian female before it was cute to be one. I (and my brother) received a lot of Love, council & instruction from the males within our family. My Father's Father would pick us up and take us to see his side of the family sometimes but often it would be to get some cheep labor from us also. Fast-Forward---> My sister In-Law has "Chose" to have 5 children. While my Wife and I do what we can, the whole situation over there is out of control. My wife and her sister obviously grew up within the same house. I've been married to my Wife for 22yrs and was attracted by how she was raising her younger brother's and sister. Again, my Mother had me in HS and my Father was soon sent to Vietnam only to return a shell of his former self from what I'm told. I was 3. While we ALL have our own baggage, scars & wounds from childhood to young adulthood (& on for some of us). I have chosen to do What-I-Can-Do. No more, No Less. Being with my children is VERY important to me. It is not for many others. We have young men walking down the street singing "On to the Next One" as their National Anthem. While my Mother (& Grand Mother) are the most powerful women in the Universe. My Brother and I would be just another statistic without the Men (brothers, uncles & yes some of Mom's boyfriends) that took the time with us. To do SOMETHING with us. We MUST start to rectify this as close to HOME as possible. I don't need to correct every little Nubian boy or girl. I just need to talk to my family and spend some time with the little ones. After all. They took time with ME!

This made me think of a comment I read today on the Mad Men forum about Joan Harris, the knockout, indispensible, 1960s era ad agency office manager at Sterling Cooper Draper Price. It said that "Joan's finding the right marriage fit was always going to be problematic. She's too strong, too dazzling, too bigger-than-life for the average man. Most of the men around her know that. As for the few who would be her equal in star quality, they were scoffed up by the "Bettys" of the dating world long ago." For those of you who don't watch Mad Men, the Bettys of the dating world are stereotypical "arm candy" wives. Joanie did get married ... to a young, handsome doctor ... but he's so threatened by her independence that he raped her on the office floor one night. True, these are characters on a TV show but something about it rings true with me, as I have many female friends who are accomplished but the men (even those who are similarly accomplished) choose arm candy or they stay single. Can one of you guys please explain this phenomenon?