A Jealous And Insecure Man

[Pioneer1]

Let me ask a provocative question.....

What's wrong with a man being jealous and insecure?

Not in a timid and scared way to the point that he doesn't take risks or chances.
But in a protective and territorial way where he's generally on alert when other men come around and suspicious that they may try to push up on his woma(e)n or take his money.

If a man should NOT think like this, WHY shouldn't he?

[Troy]

Jealously and insecurity are human emotions nothing is inherently wrong with them, but like all negative emotions including hate, fear, envy, etc we should try to moderate then.

 

If a brother greets your woman with a smile while you are standing there, do you fly into a rage or are your pleased that she was greeted in a friendly manner?

 

Do you later give her grief, or slap her around, for encouraging the brother or do you think homie was a friendly guy?

 

The emotions are natural what provokes them and how we react to them is what matters. 

[ProfD]

2 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

Let me ask a provocative question.....

What's wrong with a man being jealous and insecure?

As @Troy alluded, those are negative emotions. Usually points to deeper issues within that individual.

 

People don't make the best decisions based on their emotions. 

 

Jealousy and insecurity are not traits that enable a man to provide for and protect his woman, children, family, village, etc.

 

 

2 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

But in a protective and territorial way where he's generally on alert when other men come around and suspicious that they may try to push up on his woma(e)n or take his money.

If a man should NOT think like this, WHY shouldn't he?

A man should have the mental and physical abilities to handle his business. No time for jealousy and insecurity.

 

In fact, a strong man (mentally & physically) doesn't have to worry about his woman leaving and/or another man testing him.

 

A strong man can easily find another woman. They are attracted to him.

[Pioneer1]

Troy

 

Jealously and insecurity are human emotions nothing is inherently wrong with them, but like all negative emotions including hate, fear, envy, etc we should try to moderate then.

 

I would argue that although these are STRONG emotions, they aren't necessarily negative emotions.
It depends on their origins, context, and how they're used.

 

A man COULD use being jealous or envious of another man to take HIS woman and money....or use those same feelings and the energy they invoke to get an even MORE ATTRACTIVE woman and MORE MONEY than the man he was jealous of.

 

I believe as humans we were given all of our emotions....including jealousy and envy....for a reason.

 

 

 

 

 

If a brother greets your woman with a smile while you are standing there, do you fly into a rage or are your pleased that she was greeted in a friendly manner?

I wouldn't fly into a rage over such a minor act; but depending on WHO that brother is and especially HER REACTION to it....it may be a cause of some concern, lol.

 

If a brother KNOWN to try to snatch up every woman he comes across for the fun of it smiles at my lady a little too long I would notice that and be on alert.
And if SHE starts slobbering and acting bashful over his greetings as if she's being tickled by it...that TOO will put me on alert...lol.

 

 

 

 

Do you later give her grief, or slap her around, for encouraging the brother or do you think homie was a friendly guy?

 

I don't slap women around, however as I said....depending on HER REACTION and how often this happens...I would probably consider LEAVING her.

I don't like dealing with the stress of wondering whether or not my lady is cheating on me.

In this type of society women are too independent and we spend too much time away from eachother for me to keep an eye on her all day....so if I know she's prone to that, I just wouldn't have her as a "main".
....a SIDE DISH maybe....lol....but not my "lady".
 

 

 

 

 

 

ProfD

 

 

As @Troy alluded, those are negative emotions. Usually points to deeper issues within that individual.

 

They may indeed have issues going on in their lives.
Yet my question remains...WHAT'S WRONG with them being jealous and insecure that another man may take what they have?

 

Perhaps their insecurities are JUSTIFIED.

Perhaps he's deformed, or sexually dysfunctional, or struggles with some sort of addiction and feels that at any time his woman may be unsatisfied with him and may leave him for a "better catch".
Wouldn't it MAKE SENSE for him to be insecure and jealous when other men she may like, come around?

 

 

 

 

People don't make the best decisions based on their emotions. 

While this is true, there is usually a THOUGHT that preceded those emotions....and THAT'S what a person should pay attention to.
An emotion is simply a REACTION to a thought.
But the thought itself may be justified because it was brought about for a reason.

You have a woman who is YOUR woman...but for the past few weeks she has to get up and go downstairs to talk to somebody every other night at 2 and 3 in the morning.
She gets off of work at 5 pm and usually comes straight home....but for the past few weeks she's been coming home at 10 and 11pm at night and doesn't even have an excuse for doing so.

That's enough to make the AVERAGE man a little "emotional"....lol.

You'd be a fool not to suspect SOMETHING strange is going on.

 

 

 

 

Jealousy and insecurity are not traits that enable a man to provide for and protect his woman, children, family, village, etc.

 

I'm not sure about insecurity but I do believe JEALOUSY would definitely enable a man....atleast provide him with the energy and motivation...to protect his woman, children, family, and village.

Jealousy is a sign that he really loves or atleast desires the object OF his jealousy and would do almost anything to keep it....including fight and kill for it.

Show me a man who never gets jealous over his woman and I'll show you a man who DOESN'T HAVE a woman....or can't keep her long because another man who actually DOES want her will take her away...lol.

 

A man should have the mental and physical abilities to handle his business. No time for jealousy and insecurity.

In fact, a strong man (mentally & physically) doesn't have to worry about his woman leaving and/or another man testing him.
A strong man can easily find another woman. They are attracted to him.

You're speaking in idealistic terms....not necessarily realistic.
 
Besides, most women in this society who cheat...don't seem to choose the mean they cheat with based on their strength.
Mental or physical.
 

The fact is, based on my observation....most cheating occurs by simple ACCESS.
They more you're around a person of the opposite sex the more likely you are to have sex with them as you get to know them and know more about them.

Many Arabs and people in very religious cultures have BEEN known this for centuries....which is why they usually keep men and women who aren't married to eachother SEPARATE.
They don't work together or even go to school together.

They know things will just "happen" between men and women.

[ProfD]

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

A man COULD use being jealous or envious of another man to take HIS woman and money....or use those same feelings and the energy they invoke to get an even MORE ATTRACTIVE woman and MORE MONEY than the man he was jealous of.

There is nothing to gain in taking another man's woman.

 

A man's energy is better spent increasing his own wealth. 

 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

...I would probably consider LEAVING her.

I don't like dealing with the stress of wondering whether or not my lady is cheating on me.

 

In this type of society women are too independent and we spend too much time away from eachother for me to keep an eye on her all day....

It's best to not get involved with a woman who's not truly on the team. No stress.

 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

Yet my question remains...WHAT'S WRONG with them being jealous and insecure that another man may take what they have?

It is unproductive. People cannot own each other.

 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

Perhaps he's deformed, or sexually dysfunctional, or struggles with some sort of addiction and feels that at any time his woman may be unsatisfied with him and may leave him for a "better catch".

Wouldn't it MAKE SENSE for him to be insecure and jealous when other men she may like, come around?

A man should do whatever it takes to mske himself more attractive. More importantly, he should pursue women who are genuinely interested in him.

 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

You have a woman who is YOUR woman...but for the past few weeks she has to get up and go downstairs to talk to somebody every other night at 2 and 3 in the morning.
She gets off of work at 5 pm and usually comes straight home....but for the past few weeks she's been coming home at 10 and 11pm at night and doesn't even have an excuse for doing so.

The question becomes was she ever really his woman and how did he lose her.

 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

Show me a man who never gets jealous over his woman and I'll show you a man who DOESN'T HAVE a woman....or can't keep her long because another man who actually DOES want her will take her away...lol.

Men don't have to be jealous or insecure if they are with women who are genuinely attracted to them.

 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

You're speaking in idealistic terms....not necessarily realistic.

Realistic in my environment. 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

Besides, most women in this society who cheat...don't seem to choose the mean they cheat with based on their strength.
Mental or physical.

Just like men, women cheat for a number of reasons. 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

They more you're around a person of the opposite sex the more likely you are to have sex with them.

Depending on where one lives, works and plays, they can be around the same people of the opposite sex for many years without getting physical.

 

7 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

Many Arabs and people in very religious cultures have BEEN known this for centuries....which is why they usually keep men and women who aren't married to eachother SEPARATE.
They don't work together or even go to school together.

They know things will just "happen" between men and women.

There's several reasons culturally that men and women are kept separate. 

 

A man should only get involved with women to the extent that his mental can handle it.

[Pioneer1]

ProfD

 

There is nothing to gain in taking another man's woman.

 

1. If that was his GOAL....to take "his" woman...then that was the gain in and of itself!
2. As you've so often said before, people don't OWN eachother...so is that really "his" woman; or is she a free woman who can make up her mind as to who she wants to choose and be with moment by moment?

 

 

A man's energy is better spent increasing his own wealth. 

 

In your and my opinion, yes....however people tend to have their own goals.
If HIS particular goal isn't to increase wealth but to get THAT woman he's had eyes on since 9th grade....and he finally has an opportunity to snag her, then in HIS mind his energy is best spent chasing after her.

 

 

 

It's best to not get involved with a woman who's not truly on the team. No stress.

 

Some men learn that as they get older, some men don't learn it at all.
Some men actually like the chase and the psychological games of trying to "win" her over to his team.

 

 

 

 

It is unproductive. People cannot own each other.

 

See....you just backed up what I said earlier about people not owning eachother.
However FEAR is a powerful motivator.
If you have wealth or women and don't want to lose them....FEAR and the prospect of getting hurt will prevent a lot of men from attempting to take them from you.

 

 

 

 

A man should do whatever it takes to mske himself more attractive. More importantly, he should pursue women who are genuinely interested in him.

 

You'll get no arguments from me on this.
However if she's genuinely interested...he shouldn't have to pursue for too long...lol.

 

 

 

 

Men don't have to be jealous or insecure if they are with women who are genuinely attracted to them.

 

Unless another man she's ALSO genuinely attracted to also comes along...lol.
Now you got competition.

 

 

 

Depending on where one lives, works and plays, they can be around the same people of the opposite sex for many years without getting physical.

 

Ofcourse.
But proximity is the biggest factor.

 

Most boys find their girlfriends...not at some public playground...but as school.
Most men find their wives...not at a club or bar...but at work.

Again, this is why most men from eastern cultures keep their women AWAY from working jobs and at home.