Cynique

The late Troy Donohue and actor Sidney Poitier were contemporaries although at the opposite ends of the spectrum with Troy being a blond, blue-eyed teen idol. I wonder if any white parents saw "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?" which starred Poiter and decided to name their new born son "Sidney".

I am among those who squint at the multi-syllabic names replete with apostrophes that black baby mamas brand their kids with, names which can come back to haunt their offspring when a tight-assed paper shuffler in the human resources department decides she'd rather hire Stephanie Longworth instead of D'Shaquinta Jackson for the opening in Customer Relations. But, I also scowl at the silly names white women give their daughters which rather than being made-up, refer to an object or a place like "Apple" or "Brooklyn", or are taken from surnames like Taylor or MacKinzie. Not only do high profile goof balls think their giving birth is an event of world-wide significance, they regard their choice of a name as a proclamation wherein the more cutely-contrived it is, the better. No denying, names prejudice me. Even simpler ones like “Kayla” or “Travis” evoke images of trailer park lovers having a showdown on Jerry Springer's show, and any namesake of “Jesus” doesn’t exactly bring a pious savior to mind. When I meet a home grown black person who has taken an Arabic or African name, I immediately categorize him as someone with a deep-seeded need for self-identity, and I know before long this person will blitz me with the patented dialog about white slave masters and African nobleness, yada yada yada all in an attempt to penetrate my self-esteem even as I stifle a yawn. I know as I grow older I lose my relevancy, and time brings change. There is no accounting for taste and I have no defense for my rejection of what I consider “non-traditional” except to opine that a name should not be a tongue-twister that obliterates the person who bears it. The less odd the name, the easier it is for the uniqueness of an individual to manifest itself. I'm a sucker for a name like “Ian” or “Mia”. John and Mary also work just fine for me. I, myself, was named after an aunt. I go by a nickname but my given name is a 4-syllable Spanish one which my mother thought was “pretty”. Hispanics hear my name and think I’m Puerto Rican. I never know whether to laugh or cry… BTW, I always liked the name “Troy”, too. Before I ever became acquainted with our fearless leader, I named a character in one of my books, “Troy”.

You're funny, Crystal. And you're good with words. YOU should write a book! I'm trying to keep my enthusiasm in check for fear the Bulls will let me down.

Well, Kola, books I read which are not self-published have benefited from being proof-read, so grammatical errors don’t jump up at me they way they do in amateur endeavors. Sometimes the editing of these books leaves something to be desired but that's always a debatable issue. BTW, I don't have a high voice like Julia Child, or do I affect a phony, proper way of speaking You, Kola, apparently have an innate talent that has enabled you to navigate the dynamics of language. And "talent" is the operative word here. There are, of course, those who may be good storytellers but who are not proficient at writing. They are the ones in need of re-write people. But, if these scribblers want to pen books in their personal syntax, who's to say they can't? They should, however, be prepared to draw criticism. In any case, “UNRAVELING” by Steve Marie is there for those interested in tying up it's loose ends in the course of reading a story they've never read before!

Thank you, Jesus, for giving me the strength to overlook how a promo can prejudice a discriminating reader's desire to read a book when it begins with an incompete sentence,(A dramatic story depicting the ups & downs of relationships and the unthinkable lengths they will take you.), and when the synopsis lapses into redundacy(up and down roller coaster, a phrase where up and down is not necessary since the words roller coaster already imply an up and down motion, not to mention the repeated use of this phrase in the text which could've benefited from the application of synonyms), and which uses the verb "affect" when it should be the noun "effect",(...emotional affect that a relationship has on...), and not having your singular subject agree with your plural pronoun(...sympathizing for "a character" while simultaneously despising "them", a sentence containing a double whammy inasmuch as one sympathizes "with" not "for" a person), and, last but not least, the puzzling use of ampersands(&). Why???? I will admit that I am intrigued by the sub-title of this NEW book: "A story you've never read before". Okaaaay. Say what? Oh, sorry, Jesus. Then just forgive me. Not to worry; as I tell you all the time: nobody pays much attention to a sinner like me. Amen.

Did anybody see Tavis Smiley on Bill Maher's TV show this past week? I know if ol carey watched it he had to have been apoplectic with what Tavis and Bill had to say about Obama as they gave new meaning to the word "hater" - the label carey pins on anybody who doesn't kiss the same asses he does. Bill and Tavis both calmly stated with clarity and logic their cases for being disappointed with Obama, or as Carey calls this: "hatin". Not being a particular fan of Tavis, I have to admit that he gives the distinct impression that he thinks the country would be better served if he was president. Bill gets my vote because unlike most white liberals he’s not a hypocrite. And it's not like carey, himself, is full of sweetness and love. I'll bet that if he watched the NBA all-star game this week, his bowels had to be backing up everytime Lebron James scored, making himself less qualified for the hate carey harbors for him. And carey has to be stewing about the coach of the year specuation that persists about Chicago Bulls' Tom Thibodeau, who he hates along with top-5 center Joakim Noah. Of course Carey will continue to maintain that he knows more than sportswriters and commentators because they are paid to say good things about athletes, a ridiculous claim considering how these media vultures descend on any player who doesn’t live up to the hype. Just ask Chicago Bear quarterback, Jay Cutler. And while I’m at it, hopefully Carey had on his diaper if he happened to have read the post where I didn't show enough love for the author who checked in to promote his new book on relationships. Too bad “bookfan” had to do what Carey is too inept to do which was to tweak one of my corrections in regard to the use of an apostrophe. What can I say? I got a thing about apostrophes. Hopefully it won't turn into the obsessive-compulsive disorder that afflicts Carey when it comes to washing his teeth 10 times day. (They say the tongue can be the culprit when it comes to halitosis, so give that inert slab of blubber that stuffs your mouth a swab, too, carey) I thought your essay where you made mention of this mania was going to be about Prince's song "if I were your girl friend" but from what I could discern before losing interest, it was nothing more than your typical blather. Well, enough of passing the time about nothing. 'Guess I'll stroke my purring black cat, as I lounge in my filmy, flowing, lavender khaftan and brush my silky, silver locks before I enjoy a tasty repast of ambrosia and nectar.

AHA! Just as I suspected. The jig is up. "Caveat Postor"!

I confess to not knowing where I got the impression that you were a PETA person, bookfan. I'm sure your avatar had something to do with it. Until you identified it as a squirrel, I thought it was a rat and I figured anybody who felt a kinship with a rat had to have special feelings for animals. Anyhow, I apologize for being presumptuous about your PETA membership and I would've ceased and desisted had you ever protested my giving you this label. BTW, in spite of my analysis of you, I remain puzzled as to why you have gravitated to this black-oriented forum. You are actually a mysterious person of unknown origin, and your expertise in accessing information would make the CIA suspicious. : Needless, to say I am not in charge here, and do not speak for everybody so don't write yourself off yet when it comes to being a brother from another mother. Troy seems to appreciate you and that's a good sign. In the meantme, I look forward to your next eye-opening contribution to this board.

If I get a chance to read this book, I will probably post a mini review of it on this board.

Wellllll, bookfan, in response to your request, to me you come across as a square, well-meaning, white guy - the antithesis of the hipness and insouciance that embody the black mystique. And I sometimes get the feeling that Blacks are like specimens to you, - like life-forms to be examined under the fascination of your microscope. You always seem to be monitoring our behavior and extrapolating about our numbers, doing so from a position of entitlement. You benignly put up with our digs because you know that, when all is said and done, your whiteness makes you immune to any serious damage from us "po ol niggas". Of course, you’re free to try and familiarize yourself with blackness. - for whatever reason. But, cynic that I am, your knee-jerk bleeding heart concern with the plight of the underdog too often bespeaks of a person with a need to wallow in the pseudo humanitarianism that makes him feel good about himself, - especially when it involves your implicit empathy with minorities. And I’m not so sure that there isn’t an unconscious correlation between this and your affiliation with PETA. Granted, there’s no necessity to be unduly cruel to animals, but who’s in control here? Using their hides for clothing and their bodies for food contribute to the well-being of Mankind, and spawn industries that put the population to work. Nourishing and employing humans takes priority over the welfare of snarling animals who, if left to their own devices, would prey upon people. IMO. Of course any person who doesn’t agree with my opposition to PETA can pursue a lifestyle aligned with the philosophy of this organization. Not wanting to kill a disease-carrying mosquito who is sucking one’s blood, is an individual choice. But it is not an option that should be imposed on others, or a reason for fanatical mobs of rodent lovers to harass those exercising their human rights. But I digress. Suffice to say that very few black people were up in arms about Michael Vick's involvement in dog fights. They didn't approve but they were not frothing at the mouth, and thought he should've simply be given a slap on the wrist. I doubt if you felt this way. And that's why you could never become an honorary black man. So, bookfan, you requested my opinion of you and there it is. But my criticism doesn’t mean that I dislike you or wish that you’d to stop posting here. In your attempt to be relevant, you make interesting contributions to this board, so stick around, and keep me in check. I’ve always felt that there should be those who balance out what others consider to be my negativity; just as what I consider to be my realistic approach balances out the delusions of those who stop by to promote their pipe dreams.

Oprah did delay publicly revealing that she had a long lost half-sister in order to gain ratings by announcing that she had a secret to reveal on an upcoming show, and I'm sure her having Whoopi on an earlier show to clear up their misunderstanding was calculated. So "O" has no qualms about doing whatever it takes to bolster her viewership. It took a superstar quarterback to fake Oprah out. Her hopes of scoring a first down by interviewing Michael Vick were de-railed when he cancelled his scheduled appearance. 'Guess Oprah was a pit bull that Vick didn't want to tangle with.

bookfan, you rival me when it comes to being a know-it-all. I realize that you subconsciously consider your approval of anything on this site as a form of anointment, but I beg to differ with your paternalistic pat on Robert's head as demonstrated above. As Troy and I pointed out, the title of the book "The Complete Black Men's Guide to Developing Healthy Relationships" was misleading because a "complete black man" wouldn't need a guide to a healthy relationship, so the title would be better stated as "The Black Men's Complete Guide To More Healthy Realtionships". Of course maybe you think there's no such thing as a "complete black man". (And as far as the Compleat Angler goes, "compleat" is a perfectly acceptable archaic form of the word complete.} Yes, I was in error when I corrected Mr. Taylor's placement of the apostrophe, something I stumbled on because I thought that since there is such a usuage as "peoples", as in the peoples of the world, that this might also apply to the word "mens". But I was wrong. Thank you for setting me straight. To Robert Taylor, I say don't underestimate the value of controversy where a book is concerned. Any kind of publicity can be good publicity and my critique will gain you fans because there are a lot of people who resent pedants like me. And, as I previously said, you are free to dismiss my pointing out the lapses that take away from the professionalism of a book. Like everybody else, I wish you luck on your manual. There's no reason for me to do otherwise. You are to be commended for wanting to improve relationships between the brothas and sistas; an endeavor where luck will definitely come in handy.

Yes, Oprah is going out with a bang. All of her shows in this, her final season, have been compelling mostly because the topics usually contain an element of gossip. And we now see why Oprah has survived and Ms. Vanzant faltered. Vanzant appeared unstable and flustered and came across more like a buffoon than a spiritual guru qualified to dispense coping advice. But, "O" remained unflappable, - in total control.

Thanks for the heads up, bookfan. I knew I was on shaky ground with the "men's" thing. I let it stand in my initial post and then went back and edited it. I knew that to show possessiveness for a noun that ends in "s" that the apostrophe comes after the "s" and when I checked the dictionary just to make sure I didn't see anything specific about collective nouns like "men". BTW, in the black vernacular there is such as word as "Mens".

Oh-oh! As a member of the punctuation police, my alarm is going off! Apostrophes! Why would you use apostrophes in the second paragraph of your summary? Instead of brother's it should just be brothers since you are simply using the plural of a noun, a form which does not call for an apostrophe which is a puctuation mark used to show either possession, as in my brother's book, or as a contraction, as in my brother's writing a book, which is a contraction of my brother is writing a book. Also, think about your phrase: "The Complete Black Men's Guide to Developing Healthy Relationships." If a black man is "complete", he doesn't need a guide to developing a healthy relationship and since "men" is a plural noun, the apostrophe comes after the "s" to show possession. So, this phrase should read: "The Black Mens' Complete Guide to Developing Healthy Relationships". Now, stew a moment over my criticism and dismiss me as a "negative, nit-picking bitch" and then let it go. This has simply been a teachable moment. I'm sure your book will do well because your targeted audience is not known for being detailed-oriented. Good Luck. BTW, whenever I hear the name "Robert Taylor", I am reminded of the movie star matinee idol of the 1930's and 1940's. He was very handsome, suave, and virile and, yes, apostrophes are used to pluralize numbers and letters that stand alone.

Wow! I'm impressed; a thoroughly professional presentation on both the verbal and visual level. You had me at "metaphysical". As a fan of esoteric subject matter, this book sounds like just my cup of tea.

You're kidding, right? Is that you, BigBuck? Luring curious Blacks into a trap by offering a snake oil cure for a disease that turns your skin white? I can just imagine your idiotic sales pitch. "If you don't want your skin to turn white, taking a daily dose of this chittlin juice preparation will prevent you ignorant black apes from attempting to move up the evolutionary ladder by turning white."

OCTOGENARIAN! Damn, Troy, I aint in my 80s yet! I'm a septugenarian as in 77 and holding, Bro. Yes, your interesting account was more appropriate because it dealt with documented history rather than personal memories.

I rarely hear anybody of an race refer to Oprah as "ugly". Oprah knows how to put herself together and when skillfully made-up looks quite attractive, something most people would agree to. Her skin color is a dull brown which she brightens up and she has a good head of abundant hair that, altho permed, does not necessarily need to be enhanced with extensions. People also emphathize with her weight problem and admire how she adheres to a work-out regimen to keep herself toned. Her credo is: "live your best life", and she exemplifies this. The reason Oprah inspires so much eye-rolling is not a physical one. It is because of her overbearing pontificating and her implicit male-bashing and how no matter what problem a guest is victimized by, Oprah claims to have gone through the same thing. And course, there is a prevailing sentiment that "O" snubs black authors when it comes to her book selection and that she caters to her white audience. Anyone in the public eye becomes fair game to critics so none of this is surprising. Bottom line, Oprah doesn't need to be defended on any level because she has it made and nobody knows this more than she does How people of different shades are perceived is a fact of life. But color is just one determining factor. We all know that the desired standard of womanhood has been established by the entertainment media and the fashion industry. What should be acknowledged is that women of all ethnicities are subjected to unfavorable scrutiny if they fall short of what is considered the paragon. And, btw, in this century, luscious lips are no longer considered a flaw. Moreover, black people don't bite their tongues when it comes to criticizing how people of other races look. They are just as quick to disapprove of other's appearances as others are to disapprove of theirs. IMO

I ain't listening to shit. I can't stand the sound of your voice and don't intend to waste my time muddling through the maze of your pseudo logic. Your delusions of grandeur have reached ridiculous proportions and my time is too valuable to waste on your self-serving idiotic babbling. YOUR definition of hating. Puleeze. Who cares????

OOOOh stfu. You dont' know jack. What are your credentials other than an inflated ego. You're no expert. The Bulls do play on ESPN and TNT as well as local channels and they all say the same things. Plus all you have to do is to see NOah block and pass and shoot and Carlos cosistently make baskets to give them their props. I watch every game and see them in action while you're down there in the corn fields pickin your toes. You need to go somewhere and jack off. YOur attitude about this says a lot about your approach to life, and explains why you mistake your stupidity for acuity. You brain needs glasses because you can't see clearly. the only criteria you have for reaching conlusions is your own misguided notion that you know more than others in spite of how people regularly clean your clock.

YOu're crazier than I thought if you think I'm going to read all that drivel. Where's the post in which you tell Tyler that the title of the movie says "for colored GIRLS" after which you proceed to ridicule him and his Madea character?? And I didn't say that you said Halle couldn't act; you are putting your spin on things as usual. I said you put her down for the role she played. You aren't losing it, you've lost it because you can't confront the truth about your hypocrisy. The subject of your criticism of Halle winning an Oscar was injected into the conversation because you were boo-hooing about black people hating on each other, something you think that only you are entitled to do. You talk out of both sides of your mouth and nothing of substance comes out of either side. Talk about somebody being delusional. Look in the mirror.

YOu need to be done. Why would I place any stock in anything a duffer like you claims? I was basing my statements on what sportwriters and commentators say but, of course, you know more than they do. You're the expert. (Have you checked the stats of Noah and Carlos?) And the Bulls must be doing something right with the players and coach that they have because they're among the few teams in the NBA with a winning record in both the eastern and western conference. Woo-woo-woo they're working D. Rose too hard. What a silly statement that is, but I'll just consider the source.

YOU said this during a heated discussion about the Oscars the year Halle and Denzel won. I distinctly remember what you choose to forget. Some people were saying that they both won their Oscars for playing roles that put black people in a bad light and you agreed, saying that Halle's co-starring role opposite Billy Bob Thornton was not Oscar worthy. And you also seem to have forgotten how last year YOU were putting Tyler Perry down! I don't expect you to own up to any of this because you are so full of yourself that you stink. YOu really think that you are getting over but you ain't doing nothing but blowing smoke out of your ass. I'v gone from discussing your whining about Oprah's detractors to proving that you are guilty of doing what you accuse others of doing - as usual. You're pathetic.