Troy

No, you keep screwing up my opinion. Stated plainly. I think men need to define what it means to be masculine. Women define what they find sexy and who to copulate with. I'm not understanding why you keep writing I want women to take my opinion into account. If a man's definition of masculinity does not appeal to women, we will adjust accordingly. You can't force someone to like something they don't like. That leads to incel groups, rape, and all forms of dysfunction. That is you as an individual. I'm talking about men in general. Some individuals don't even desire sex. Some men want to attract a mate but consistently fail. I'm talking about the general case. In general, effeminate men (barring any other beneficial characteristics including wealth, power, or musical genius) will have more difficulty that a man with more traditional masculine characteristics. One would think this is common sense. Del, the reason people have a desire to knock boots is biological. The underlying reason for this is biology is procreation. Damn Del -- ME TOO, because I'm not a woman! Yeah, I've had women tell me the first thing they look at on a man is his shoes. I've heard this so many times it is a cliché. But I tell you what, when I'm on the prowl, my shoes are together. That comedian's joke was funny 😉 Having grown up in the 'hood it was not true there either. @Delano would you trade your body for Prince's? Do you think it would help or hurt your ability to attract a woman as a sex partner? @Pioneer1, you've described yourself as not the most handsome dude in the room, would you trade with Prince?

That is absolutely correct! Thanks man! That should have been easy for me...

OK, you caught me out there 🙂 Sometimes I take myself too seriously.... There is always intercourse too 😉 @Cynique It is times like this that I miss your exchanges with @ABM ...

Clearly! Data means nothing to this man 🙂 @Pioneer1 you may be right, but we can't really know. I would not be surprised that woman outside of the U.S. would not find a physically effeminate man, like Prince, sexy. Again, you can fill-in-the-blank with anything and my opinion holds. Of course. Indeed that is one of the reason a site like AALBC needs to exist. OK I see the disconnect. I was talking about men defining masculinity, while you and @Cynique were describing sex appeal. I do not think a man can determine what a woman finds sexy. What a woman finds sexy (want to breed with) are the attributes men will try to enhance -- otherwise they will be naturally selected out of the gene pool. Here is a theory: Since most men are not trying to present the way Prince does, one can assume that this is not a technique that will attract women. It is Prince's, wealth, power, and musical talent that women really find sexy. The typical man has no problem trying to develop these qualities because they definitely attract women and they also happen to be masculine traits. This is not by accident. Yes, I think I understand your point now.

I came across this phrase in the title of Sly Stone's upcoming Memoir, Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin): A Memoir by Sly Stone and Ben Greenman It fell like I should be able to get it, and it is probably something simple -- there must be some mental block. Can sometime tell me what the heck this means please. 🙂

Where did I write or suggest that @Delano? Even if I were unclear, or your lens misinterpreted the meaning of what I wrote, I think you know me well enough to know that I would not suggest, or even want, my definition to become the standard for everyone else. I never expressed an opinion in what manhood should mean. What I did say was that men should make that determination, which was in direct reaction to Cynique's statement, "Men need to stay mum when it comes to the subject of masculinity..." If I wrote, "women should keep quite when it comes to femininity...," that would sound crazy wouldn't it? Maybe you can relate on this level; on a smaller scale @Delano you should get to determine who Del is -- no one else should have that capability that is tantamount to taking away your freedom. Do you agree?

what your are describing are important events, but you are missing my point. Think of it this way @Delano what was the first telephone that you remember? It probably was a wired, rotary dial phone. That technology was in wide spread use a decade before you were born and well into the 70s. The only improvement was the push button phone which was in wide spread use until the late 1980s when cordless phone became available. there were only minor incremental changes to telephone technology for decades. Someone just 30 years old witnessed the change from push button phones to pocket sized super computers! The advances in technology have been profound and unprecedented. Moreso than even the Industrial Revolution. Adaotion to technological change is difficult . Adoration to the rapid changes we are witnessing in recent years is extremely difficult. There was a reason the VCRs of senior citizens were always flashing “12:00” 🙂 Adaotion to social change is difficult . Adoration to the rapid sociological changes we are witnessing in recent years is extremely difficult. Adaptation to rapid social change is probably more difficult. We adapt to social change as people steadfast in their old beliefs die off.

Of course this has always been the case. White racists have been dupped into believing the most marginalized people in this country are the problem. One would have thought after seeing 600,000, mostly poor white people used as canon fodder to defend the wealth of the oligarchy things would be different today. White boys are beat by the police too, but that does not work with the narrative, so it is ignored. White men are frustrated. The are committing suicide at record rates, addicted to opioids -- their life expectance has gone down in recent years. The anger of racists is misdirected. Again this is by design, but since this is not taught in schools. A poorly educated population is easily distracted, manipulated, and abused. The protests against the war in Vietnam, in reaction to all the senseless loss of life, was one of the few times white boys recognized they were being abused... Racists never learn. It is astonishing white racists continue to believe Black people are their problem. The same ole tricks continue to work.

Oh you won't need to worry the universe will snatch this himan racve up soon enough. We see the damage we are doing to the planet, but none of us, including myself are doing a damn thing about it. Maybe in a 1,000 millennia after the human race has been wiped rendering the planet inhospitable to homo sapiens and new life form will do a better job. They will dig up our remains and ponder why we were so self destructive.

Pred, this statement reveals how little you know about American history. This is not surprising given our educational system and the way our media work -- especially today. The really alarming thing is the push back educators are getting, mostly in the former slave states, teaching students about Black history. In some ways we are taking steps backward. Back to the video: Tell me @Pred007, what did that women do to deserved to get decked by a grown man. If you ask me, a man who would punch a woman in the face like that is the one behaving alike a nigger.

@Cynique Were you up on the meaning and distinctions between Womyn and Womxn before I made my post? Were you up on Mxn? (how do you even pronounce these "words?") Cynique, surely you must appreciate that in the last 50 years along with dramatic and rapid changes in technology we have seen similar changes in our culture. The scope of these changes are unprecedented! Prior to that things did not change so rapidly and I think this is what has many boomers to stressed that they would vote for a Trump and use woke as a slur. Think about it, someone could have lived a life time and listened to music on the radio or a record player. Someone who is 40 today would have listened to music on records, cassette tapes, CDs, mp3 players, and now streaming services. This demographic may have been able to adapt more easily than the typical 70-year-old but the constant changes are a source of stress --even for young people. Have a little compassion for us Boomers and GenXers. Some people will never get with the times. The world is changing rapidly and humans are simply not built to adapt this quickly.

I guess it depends upon how much they have been influenced by American culture, which you see through the global Black diaspora. After almost 20 years of reading your often impressive posts, I must say that statement is the first one I could think of that does not make sense. Who else, besides men, should control the subject of the very thing that defines us, masculinity. Obviously, men will disagree on the subject, but we must be the ones to control the narrative and define what is means to be masculine. Now a man running around in high heals, a blouse and mascara. Might be sexy to women but most men would not define that as masculine. Since you are not in the habit of making nonsensical statements I clearly missed something...what was it? Of course Prince was a great musician. Based upon what I'm reading from you @Delano is that if Price were not the gifted artist that he was... in other words if was was an average mope flipping burgers and Denny's he'd lose most of his sex appeal. Once thing that seems to be true is that masculinity has little to do with sex appeal. Through when I was much younger I recall women buying into the notion that they want a little thug in their men. Though during the same time the "pretty boys" -- pulled a lot of women too...

What makes that video so crazy is that has not the Smith/Rick incident occurred the situation in this video would have been too outrageous to be funny.

So @Pred007 you are proud of the way that man treated that woman? BTW don’t describe Black peoples as niggers here.

Talk about creating a strawman. not even worth addressing as I never write anything close to this .. sheesh! What have YOU accomplished @jollyrogers, other than a grand display of ignorance and a penchant for creating strawman arguments?

Given that he is an ex-president with the best health care imaginable Trump may outlive us both 🙂 How about I give you 4 to 1 ($100 to your $25) that Trump does no time in prison before the end of 2024? That does not include house arrest.

Yes. Despite all the misleading statements you made. We can make it simple and just boil it down to life expectancy. The life expectancy of a Black person in America had almost doubled in the last 100 years. Of course, the quality of life, the amount of leisure time, and the variety of diversions we have access to has increased dramatically as well. It is like we have been blessed with an additional higher quality life compared to Black people from just 100 years ago. That is not to say that this trajectory will continue with climate change. On the heels of Covid, Opioids, and mass shootings a year or two has been knocked off the life expectancy of Americans, but we are still FAR better off today than 100 years ago.

I've been asking women who they found more sexy Idris Elba (masculine) or Prince (feminine). Surprisingly (to me) Prince ranks higher. Sure this is anecdotal, but nonetheless interesting. I thought my pop culture quote was low @Chevdove Lil Nas X gained a great deal of popularity he & Billy Ray Cyrus won a Best Music Video Of The Year in 2020.

I use the word "conscious" as opposed to "woke." You are right @Pioneer1 the word has been co-opted by right-wing extremists who have perverted the idea into ridiculing so-called left-wing extremism. The sentiment of my post was intended to reflect the confusion or lack of resonance, I feel for these terms, hence the "Black Misery" quote.

Black Misery Is... Believing you are woke, but realizing you are fast asleep. 😉 I was collecting information about a literary magazine, Brown Sugar, that I plan on adding to the site when I discovered this description: “Brown Sugar is a womanist literary magazine for women, womxn, and womyn of color, of any nationality, sexuality, religion, or cultural diasporas that are misrepresented and underrepresented.” I've seen womyn before but, womxn was a new one on me. My understanding of what I thought womyn meant seemed to preclude the need for womxn. Obviously I was wrong. Issues of gender, transphobia, sexism collide to create plays on words that aren't universally understood or even accepted by the people in the communities that are supposed to benefit, let alone the general public. It is like the Negro/Black/Afro-American/African-American debate but far more confusing (at least to me). Seeking additional understanding I discovered “Myn,” gave up and moved on to another activity....

Hey @Delano, lets define a time boundary and you have a bet. Does before the end of 2024 work for you?

Actually all of these ills have been greatly reduced especially in America. Compare America of 1823 or even 1923 with 2023. The same improvement is true for the rest of the world. Interracial marriage was once described as the mongrel mixing of the races. It was a against the law in many states. A Black man could be lynched for looking sideways at a white woman. Did white men stop "protecting" their women, or they just grow up. Today black and white people top the list of interracial marriages. This freedom makes the world a better place.

You know our media. if Clinton was still getting head from young women or if Obama started grabbing the genitalia of random women they would be both all over the media too. It took Carter being at death's door to get any ink. It seems unlikely that 45 will do any time for the Stormy Daniels affair. The likelihood of him doing time for this charge, or any in the future, seems small, but it far from zero. Vegas does not think Trump will go to jail. DONALD TRUMP TO BE SENTENCED TO JAIL? ODDS Yes +600 No -1500 6.25% is the implied probability that he will go to jail. No is the "favorite," and you'd have to bet $1,500 win $100, or you can bet $100 to win $600 (I'd take that bet 🙂).

Just a few minutes ago I added a book to the site, C Is for Country by Lil Nas X. I have not seen the physical book, but after living in Oklahoma for a year and a half and attending my first Black rodeo, I learned there is what I'll call a modern "horse culture" that I did not recall seeing in a children's books, and felt it was important to have this book added to the site. I discovered C Is for Country after learning more about the book illustrator, Theodore Taylor III. Theo is a prolific children's book illustrator whose work was inadequately reflected on this site given his contributions to Black children's literature. I was already familiar with Lil Nas X as a result of Grammy award winning song Old Town Road I added the Video to Lil Nas' page. This video was queued up next the preview thumb nail image (shown below) stuck me. I was like WTF is this?! The Old Town Road video did not reflect anything that the video YouTube queued up video preview suggested. When videos are added to YouTube you can define the preview image and it is obvious this preview image was selected to attract attention, bolstered by Google's algorithm the video has been viewed over 430 million times in the past year. Interestingly, the video has also raised more that $77K for the The Bail Project. I could not help but think of @Pioneer1 theories when watching the video. I'm also curious to read what people think about the shower scene in this music video. It seems gratuitous, though I assume gay men might disagree... What do you women think?

Well @Pioneer1 complaining about the situation has obviously not done anything to change things. Why do you think men bitching about it would have a different effect? Still, the fundamental issue is why do you care so much about who other people choose to love or spend their lives with. Why do you believe they should conform to you standard?