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Kalexander2

Why do people try to hide who they really are? Advancing self-discrepancy theory

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The anonymity of cyberspace provides people with a unique environment to behave more freely and openly with less restraint from the real world.  Individuals can express their true self more freely and openly online than offline.  People desire to perform effectively, to obtain the experience [or the impression] of being competent.

 

The self-discrepancy theory proposed three domains of self: actual, ideal and ought self.

 

An example could be used to better explain the difference between the three domains of the self. For a shy and lazy man who is currently an ordinary programmer in an IT company, the identity of a programmer is the actual self that he expresses and be

 

recognized by others in the company. His wish is to be a popular singer who is extrovert. The extrovert singer is the ideal self from his point of view. At the same time, himself and others (e.g., his wife) believe that he should work harder to better take care of the family. Then, the diligent worker and responsible husband are the ought self he should be.

 

Generally, identity is defined as a certain “kind of people” that an individual expresses and [want to] be recognized by others in a given context. Subjective to variously given context, an individual’s identity is ambiguous and unstable. Identity is also defined as the actual attributes that an individual presents in daily life, namely actual self.  Can one truly know who a person is with or without revealing her/his true self, and how much harder, or substantial is it when someone deliberately hide?

 

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Sometimes people who are trying to conceal their true identity inadvertently provide clues for a perceptive person to pick up on.  A lot can be discerned by someone who can instinctively read between the lines of what someone else writes - or says.  Who and what ideology an individual supports can indicate the political persuasion of an anonymous person, or at least narrow down the type he or she can be categorized as.  Yes, people can pretend to be something they are not, but unless you are on an online dating site, what purpose does this serve?  Most people conceal their identity on line so they can be their true selves without fear of repercussions.  

 

You tend to come across as offensive, and poised to get people before they get you.  I think this is facade, an acquired persona.  The real you is probably more filled with adventure than aggression.  

 

 

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4 hours ago, Cynique said:

Most people conceal their identity on line so they can be their true selves without fear of repercussions.  

 

You tend to come across as offensive, and poised to get people before they get you.  I think this is facade, an acquired persona.  The real you is probably more filled with adventure than aggression.  

2

 

Yes, and Yes sister Cynique.  I'm embarrassed to say so but I do find it adventurous mocking certain individuals.  I said before and I say again, your damn preception is scary.  An acquired facade to hid discrimination and marginalization I've experienced in the past. You are indeed a very intelligent woman!

4 hours ago, Cynique said:

Yes, people can pretend to be something they are not, but unless you are on an online dating site, what purpose does this serve?  Most people conceal their identity on line so they can be their true selves without fear of repercussions.  

 

According to excerpts from the study above, you are right.  "Advancing self-discrepancy theory: The online service providers are advised to implement features that support virtual identity reconstruction so that individuals can express more true self with reconstructed identities."  Then, are you suggesting that their 'true self' come across as 'real' is also a kind of eat-and-run attempt to see how far they can go?

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Cynique

 

You tend to come across as offensive,


Lol.....
You could have just STOPPED right there as that pretty much sums it up.

But I'm pleased to see you're starting to interact with him....lol....this should be quite interesting.

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5 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

You could have just STOPPED right there as that pretty much sums it up.

 

Pioneer1:  You have your entire life to be stupid. Why not take the rest of today off?

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Perhaps the REAL question should be......

Why is there a need to KNOW the identity of everyone who is using the internet?

......unless you belong to some secretive organization and are building a profile of the users and what they think.


Much of the spying that is taking place today is a violation of privacy beyond the wildest dreams of the so-called "founders" of America who are claimed by some as the champions of liberty and basic personal rights.

Some people are going to jail simply because of what they said or posted on Facebook.

I think what Roseanne said about that sexy ass Valerie Jarret was not only inappropriate but down right appauling.
But the idea that an employer can discipline you or even fire you because of what you said on Twitter or Facebook is even MORE appauling in my opinion.

And the worse part of all of this is young people are being conditioned to voluntarily give up their privacy and personal information in the name of being "transparent" without the slightest understanding that all of this information they're sharing with the world just might be used to harm or manipulate them socially, financially, or even legally.

You'd be a fool...or just Krazy as hell..lol....NOT to conceal atleast some of your personal information when navigating online today.

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1 hour ago, Pioneer1 said:

You'd be a fool...or just Krazy as hell..lol....NOT to conceal atleast some of your personal information when navigating online today.

 

Right, because you have so much to lose.  I forgot you wouldn't want anyone getting your SSN to steal all your money.  No, yoyo, identity conveyance is about giving us an idea of who are or want to be. Hence: actual, ideal and ought self.  But in your case, we still have not an idea who you really are, except that you have a schoolboy crush on sister @Cynique who I think find you repulsuve.

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3 minutes ago, Kalexander2 said:

 

 we still have not an idea who you really are, except that you have a schoolboy crush on sister @Cynique who I think find you repulsuve.


The only one around here who has "crushes" on sisters is YOU....you incestuous freak, lol.

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6 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

The only one around here who has "crushes" on sisters is YOU....you incestuous freak, lol.

 

Okay, okay, right.  Trying to deflect attention from yourself, again?  GIVE IT A REST ALREADY, too late; you're exposed and it's disgusting!!!  Unexpose yourself or go show your mommy.

 

Please just tell me you don’t plan to home-school your kids.  

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Krazy Alexander said:
Image result for clarence williams iii tales from the hood
"Unexpose yourself or go show your mommy."

 


I don't know about where YOU come from, but we just didn't do that in OUR family, lol.

Tell me something Krazy Al......

When you hear the term
"family values", do you still get flashbacks of what you and your siblings were SOLD for?
 

 

 

 

 

Please just tell me you don’t plan to home-school your kids.


Please just don't tell me that you even HAVE kids.....lol.

I thought they sterilized those of your mental condition back when you were trying to grow up.

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9 minutes ago, Kalexander2 said:

@Pioneer1 p(h)ony: There are some remarkably dumb people in this world. Thanks for helping me understand that. 

 

No problem.

That's what SPECIAL EDUCATION is all about....Special K, lol.

Now put you helmet back on and go run along and play safely.

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7 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

That's what SPECIAL EDUCATION is all about....Special K, lol.

Now put you helmet back on and go run along and play safely.

 

You're on a roll with the dumb comebacks.  Really matches the limit of your existence.   Are you always such an idiot, or do you just show off when I’m around?

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3 minutes ago, Kalexander2 said:

.Special K

 

Thanks for thinking I'm special,  you did tell me to expect hostility from you; so when are you going to get hostile and stop being funny?  Or, you just can't help it!

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5 minutes ago, Kalexander2 said:

 

 Are you always such an idiot, or do you just show off when I’m around?

 


Fool, the only reason YOU'RE AROUND today is because I "showed off" and someone was impressed.....LOL.

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1 minute ago, Pioneer1 said:

I "showed off" and someone was impressed

 

Sure about that?  I think we all need a comedian around to break-up the monotony of having serious discussions.   Case-in-point here we are now, thanks to you.  

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It may make more sense, in most cases, for people to hide their identity when online.  People are held accountable for what they put in the web -- ofen without their knowledge.  This is a problem that people are not taking seriously at all. 

 

@Pioneer1, you may be using an avatar but if you've visited any of the large social media site your identity is known.  To truly hide one's identity takes a great deal of effort and as Cynique points out we reveal clues about who were are by the nature of what we say.

 

I'm not convinced that people (non-trolls) who use avatars and fake names less honest than people who do. @Cynique (she is a novelist) did not initially reveal her identity, but after she did the nature of her posts did not change.  From a personal perspective I would never have guessed her age, because Cynique is not what one envisions as the stereotypical little old lady.  It revealed a bias I had and I'm learned you can't prejudge people.  I don't anyone is the proverbial little old lady if you listen to them.

 

@Thumper, fought to hide his identity -- never allowing me to take his photo (thought one is on the site now).  Indeed people simply assumed I was Thumper.  Because Thumper was so honest with his book reviews people either loved him or hated him.  I know, because I bore the brunt of these emotions by people who thought I was Thumper or because I provided a platform for him.

 

There was another poster on this site who used to post under different names. I knew this to be the case because that person(who I will not name), posted from the same IP address and the writing style was similar, so this was obvious -- but not always.  One of the aliases was of a known journalist, who emailed me to say that someone was posting under her identity on the website.  I deleted bogus account but allowed the original poster to continue to post, because others found their posts so interesting.

 

Zane ran her own website discussing erotica for years and was a published author before anyone knew who she was.  She posed on these forums back in the day.  She introduced herself to me at a book convention and, as with Cynique, she was nothing like the women I'd imagined in my head. In many ways our imaginations are better than reality. Once you become a celebrity it is impossible to maintain your anonymity -- because people work so hard to figure out who you are.

 

Bottom line, I don't really care if someone chooses to post under an alias.  It has the benefit of; (1) preventing people from judging you based upon your age, gender, race, education, location, etc. This focuses them solely on what you write; and (2) it protects you from losing your job over some nonsense you may have posted.

 

 

 

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Troy

Those in the government with the high technology know who's posting and have your information.
That's not who I'm concerned about.

It is what it is.

But what you must be especially careful for are these White racist trolls and computer geeks who lurk around Black websites monitoring the members and even joining to troll and gather information.

AfroAmericans shouldn't feed them their personal information to use as ammunition.



 

 

A few months ago, Krazy Alexander said:


Image result for clarence williams iii tales from the hood
"I’m in a foreign country with a questionable background and a target on his back. I need to blame someone for some recent experiences I’ve faced.

 

There’s no better evidence than social media records and data. "

 

https://aalbc.com/tc/topic/5062-listening/?tab=comments#comment-26293

 

 

Well hell, you already have the answer to your own damn question!

If the data you put out on social media is the reason your paranoid ass thinks someone is following you around.....why would you encourage OTHERS to make the same mistakes YOU made?????

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17 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

Those in the government with the high technology know who's posting and have your information.
That's not who I'm concerned about.

It is what it is.

But what you must be especially careful for are these White racist trolls and computer geeks who lurk around Black websites monitoring the members and even joining to troll and gather information.

AfroAmericans shouldn't feed them their personal information to use as ammunition.

 

Remember when we asked for your opinion? Me neither.  But you should know your continued attempts to deflect attention from yourself only draws more attention to you.

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Krazy Alexander said:

Image result for clarence williams iii tales from the hood

"But you should know your continued attempts to deflect attention from yourself only draws more attention to you. "


Attention from WHO????.....YOU????

Is that your way of telling me you're ATTRACTED to me....you old lisp-tongued sissy.

Lol.....

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5 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

Is that your way of telling me you're ATTRACTED to me....you old lisp-tongued sissy.

 

You give a new meaning the term "two-faced," on one side you suggest gay tendencies, on the other you suggest tough gay tendencies.  I bet you'll hide if confronted with a brother hoping he doesn't see you, scared of getting punched in the face.  

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20 minutes ago, Kalexander2 said:

 

You give a new meaning the term "two-faced," on one side you suggest gay tendencies, on the other you suggest tough gay tendencies.  I bet you'll hide if confronted with a brother hoping he doesn't see you, scared of getting punched in the face.  

 

Lol......what's up with all of the violent talk, troll?

Are you trying to get me say something incriminating???

You're probably doing it for the same reason you're posting all of these anti-Jewish conspiracy theories and remarks that you know will get the site flagged.

YOU supply the dirt so that your co-workers can come in claiming that the laws were violated on this site.

Lol...is THAT your angle, fool?

 

 

 

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25 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

.what's up with all of the violent talk, troll?

Are you trying to get me say something incriminating???

 

It's not violent talk, it's me talk, and to show you're a thin-skinned tenderfoot and, in reality, a coward.

 

25 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

You're probably doing it for the same reason you're posting all of these anti-Jewish conspiracy theories and remarks that you know will get the site flagged.

YOU supply the dirt so that your co-workers can come in claiming that the laws were violated on this site.

Lol...is THAT your angle, fool?

 

Hey, twinky, it's not what you say but how you say it that makes the difference.  Everything I post is deliberate and calculated.  But I wouldn't expect for you to not pretend you don't understand that - seeing everything you post is a deliberate, uncalculated attempt to take attention away from your posts that help the White agenda and debase Black folk.

 

Besides, I'm sure brother Troy would love the international attention for an illegal censorship of a real Black website dedicated to all Black folk where everyone is welcome.  Equitable damages of a counter lawsuit would put AALBC.com over the top!!  And I'll help him win it, rally the public or whatever it takes.

 

Sucking up, Pioneer1 p(h)ony doesn't work with intelligent Black folk, or are just playing this by-ear?  

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Krazy Alexander

 

 

From a "cowards" perspective, you made an INTERESTING statement in another thread.

You said:


"there was a time I was pro-life. Then I started reading your posts. I thank God I never met or I'd be pro death-penalty. "
 

https://aalbc.com/tc/topic/5190-royal-wedding-are-you-watching/?page=2

 

 

Lol, I found that statement QUITE interesting.

Since everything you post is deliberate and calculated, perhaps you should explain EXACTLY what you meant by that statement.

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19 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

Since everything you post is deliberate and calculated, perhaps you should explain EXACTLY what you meant by that statemen

 

It means I THINK before I type and know what I'm typing and to whom I'm typing.

 

19 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

"there was a time I was pro-life. Then I started reading your posts. I thank God I never met or I'd be pro death-penalty. "

 

In other words, because YOUR MAMA SHOULD HAVE ABORTED YOU but didn't, I'm now all for abortions and, maybe for the death penalty should I ever meet you!!!

 

 Pioneer1 p(h)ony,  I wonder if the witch and deadbeat you call mom and dad; your parents even realize they’re living proof that two wrongs don’t make a right; And if you've learned from their mistake?

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9 minutes ago, Kalexander2 said:

 

It means I THINK before I type and know what I'm typing and to whom I'm typing.

 

 

In other words, because YOUR MAMA SHOULD HAVE ABORTED YOU but didn't, I'm now all for abortions and, maybe for the death penalty should I ever meet you!!!



;)  Well, THANKS for clarifying that statement and for making it CRYSTAL clear who you are and what your agenda is here!

You're not called Krazy Alexander around here for nothing....lol.

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2 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

Well, THANKS for clarifying that statement and for making it CRYSTAL clear who you are and what your agenda is here!

You're not called Krazy Alexander around here for nothing

 

Well, that's disappointing, I'd thought you were going for something more substantive, I'll with 'Krazy' then because that hurts so much more! HA. 

37 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

From a "cowards" perspective, you made an INTERESTING

 

You clarify now, does that mean you are coward too, or that I am and you are not?  The very perception you project on this site, hiding and all is proof you're a coward; as if disclosing who you really are will result in some kind of identity theft or government conspiracy because you're so important.  I can’t help imagining how much better the world would be if your deadbeat dad had just pulled out.

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What, no snappy comeback, has your kindergarten teacher ordered everyone to take a nap; or are you searching the site of past posts to spur your imagination?  Come on now, it's getting boring!

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Krazy Alexander taunted:
 

Image result for clarence williams iii tales from the hood
"What, no snappy comeback? Come on now, it's getting boring! "



A "comeback"?????

I said weeks ago that this wasn't a GAME...fool, lol.
Nor do I make threats over the internet.

My questions weren't for fun!

They were calculated and DESIGNED to be the rope that was provided for you to (proverbially) HANG yourself with because your responses have proven that:

1. You're a liar who has even admitted such
2. You're a troll who admitted you got joy from pushing people's buttons
3. You're mentally disturbed and FINALLY resorted to making online threats which I was waiting on.

And a QUITE POSSIBLE fourth......

4. You feel comfortable making anti-Semetic statements and violent threats DESPITE claiming you're living in "Israel" because you're actually lying about your identity and your REAL JOB prevents you from being prosecuted for your statements.
It's your JOB to go on and poke and prod and troll people until they're angry enough to respond in a reckless manner.....if they were "Krazy" enough to do so. 
Which is why you have plenty of "free time" to monitor everyone's comments and respond so quickly.

And I've proven all 3 and possibly....quite possibly...the fourth, beyond ANY shadow of doubt and without breaking any laws or rules.

You may have been calculating, but you certainly weren't the ONLY one.....lol.

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50 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

I said weeks ago that this wasn't a GAME...fool, lol.

 

Okay, Mr. LOL, not a game to you.  It is to me, or do you doubt I'm having fun.  Well, NO SNAPPY COMEBACK because you're late and weak.  Without further ado, let us get started, shall we?  But first, let's be serious, I'll give you benefit of the doubt.  

 

50 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

My questions weren't for fun!

They were calculated and DESIGNED to be the rope that was provided for you to (proverbially) HANG yourself with because your responses have proven that:

1. You're a liar who has even admitted such
2. You're a troll who admitted you got joy from pushing people's buttons
3. You're mentally disturbed and FINALLY resorted to making online threats which I was waiting on.

 

Like I said: It means I THINK before I type and know what I'm typing and to whom I'm typing." Says nothing that you're trying to infer.  That's right, I said I'm a liar, I enjoy pushing your buttons, very much.  

 

Now, prove you are different:  Pioneer1, ARE YOU A LIAR?

Do you enjoy calling me Krazy Alexander, mentally disturbed?

 

You opened yourself up for these questions, NOW, answer honestly.  EVERYBODY'S WATCHING!!!

 

50 minutes ago, Pioneer1 said:

but you certainly weren't the ONLY one

 

Please explain what mean by that statement, exactly.  After all, we're being serious, right?

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Pioneer1:  I get a sense you're about to put your foot in your own mouth, again.  So let me help you out:

 

It starts when we are very young. The chant from childhood: "Who took the cookies from the cookie jar?" and the refrain: "Not me."

 

It's the little toddler with chocolate smeared from ear to ear saying "I didn't eat any candy." Or the third grader with bright red nails that now decorates the beige living room carpet who says "What nail polish?"

 

Maybe it's the high schooler who tells his parents he had a B on his term paper that he has not even turned into his teacher.

 

Did you ever lie? If you are alive and breathing, the answer is "Of course!"

 

Why do we do it? Why do we twist the truth and turn a blind eye to others who do so?

 

There are various shades of gray in lying from catching a fish that gets bigger and bigger with each telling, to some of the famous liars of the day sitting in jail like Bernard Madoff, whose charm won over smart folks like Steven Spielberg and Elie Wiesel with his Ponzi Scheme.

 

Is it lying to over-promise and under-deliver?

 

Or like disgraced Olympic swimmer Brian Lochte who fabricated a robbery to save his butt after a night of heavy drinking in Rio. Did he over-exaggerate (small fish becomes a big fish) or just out-right lie hoping to save his butt? We all know he plain out lied.

 

I simply realize this universal fact and accept because I know it to be true, first hand.  PLEASE RESPOND. 

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Further:  Dr. Mark Domberk, Ph.D., yes a Jew, insults are a common and healthy defense mechanism. 

 

"Personality defenses (coping techniques, defense mechanisms) are important things in that they strongly influence the ease with which people are able to form and maintain healthy relationships and reject unhealthy relationships. Developing organically in response to frustrating, difficult and painful situations and experiences, they function as the human equivalent of a computer firewall, helping to defend against hurtful and abusive relationships, while hopefully also allowing healthy and nurturing relationships to pass. Discriminating when to be defensive and when not to be defensive is key for health. You need defense to keep you safe from those who would mess with you, but you also need to know when to relax and let your defenses down so as to retain the capability for innocence, openness and healthy relationships. Defenses are important, an immune system unto themselves. They're worth spending an essay talking about."

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@Pioneer1:  I'll take your non-answer as an ADMISSION you are a liar and enjoy insulting others, or as a DENIAL you are not a liar nor enjoy insulting others; in either case, YOU'RE A DISHONEST PERSON which is the nature of my complaint against you.  THANKS FOR FINALLY BEING HONEST!!!

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Krazy Alexander

 

Lol....

Fool, you keep shitting out post after post and except for me, no one else is paying attention to you.

So who are you talking to.....yourself???

Wanna get serious?

OK

Like I said, for the past few weeks I've proven WHO you are and WHAT you are which is why most of the other posters have been ignoring you and avoiding any meaningful conversation with your Krazy ass.

Outside of Chevdove who is relatively new to the board, you have to BEG other people for conversation with you as you try to impress them with your diction and breadth of understanding of a given topic......but even when they respond to you it's usually a quick answer and you're soon ignored again.

Haven't you noticed this?

It's because they.....we...all can see that despite your seeming smarts and articulation.....something isn't quite right about you.


The only reason I continued talking and going back and forth was for the above stated reasons because I knew where it would lead with someone of your temperament.

 

You're a nut case my man..........

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5 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

Like I said, for the past few weeks I've proven WHO you are and WHAT you are which is why most of the other posters have been ignoring you and avoiding any meaningful conversation with your Krazy ass

 

 

According to you, I'm the one who's proven who and what I am by words from own mouth.  Being who you want me to be is your problem, not mine.  If you have a problem with who I am, a problem with how I think, a problem with what I say, and a problem I'll never apologize?  "YOU HAVE A LOT of PROBLEMS."  I don't have a problem, not even if you ignore me and all my posts, that's convenient for me because you are not interesting to me, nothing you say is important and I couldn't care less if I never heard from you again.  But you've made that threat before.  To go one even better, from this moment forward I will ignore you and pretend you never existed, even if you insult/attack with all you have; I'll ignore you.  That's all the proof I need to confirm the truth what and who you are.   

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14 hours ago, Pioneer1 said:

Outside of Chevdove who is relatively new to the board, you have to BEG other people for conversation with you as you try to impress them with your diction and breadth of understanding of a given topic......but even when they respond to you it's usually a quick answer and you're soon ignored again.

Haven't you noticed this?

It's because they.....we...all can see that despite your seeming smarts and articulation.....something isn't quite right about you.

How do you know the caliber of Kalexander's enunciation?  Can you hear him speak??? He has never begged me to converse with him, and others here converse with him just as much as they do you. You can't make points when your statements are inaccurate and subjective. You need to stop assuming that others share your opinion about Kalexander and that you are our spokesman. (This is what pushes me into Kalexander's corner. )

 

Anyhoo, I'm sure everybody is glad you 2 have agreed to put a sock in your "debate".  Nothing was accomplished by it, except that you both inadvertently revealed things about yourselves.

 

 

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1 hour ago, Cynique said:

I'm sure everybody is glad you 2 have agreed to put a sock in your "debate".  Nothing was accomplished by it, except that you both inadvertently revealed things about yourselves.

 

Word.

 

Actually Chevdove created her account several years ago, I'm not sure why she just started regularly.  We get scores of new registrants every month, but outside of those looking to get their book reviewed few actually post.  

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