that's a possibility... but it's not different...but it's still a past life that the current host has lived...

@Delano, maybe i missed something - but I thought this graph was indicating co2 emission is not related to global warming because it didn't track with the rise in temperature? and the charts are showing something else is in play?

@Troy It's because you're over-thinking it. ( I never use that term. lol) But You can't think your way into "seeing" someone. It's not with the mind or eyes, it's with the heart.

@Troy ,If you're caught up on the "seen" then that's where your focus belongs. Your focus is not on how others see . That's irrelevant in this task. Are YOU are willing to to "see" your life partner. Are you willing to see your partner objectively? This means to see her at her core... See past her behaviors and habits and into the heart of her maybe even more deeply than she's willing to see herself. If you are it ceases to be a task and instead becomes an ability.

And if we included Personal Intelligence , we can use the 3 legged chair as a foot stool because possibly one person who is already seated might be willing to share his/her seat and or lap .

There's nothing so satisfying as being SEEN by the one with whom you share Life and LOVE...

This was really good, @Troy! Do you know I don't have a clue as to how the stock market works. (I have an idea but not enough to teach) but I still made a nice chunk of cash and cashed out to do other things with my money... Do you want to know how? Because I pay attention!!! I listen! I bought walgreens at $35 a share and sold at $105 I think it was... It wasn't insider trading I just paid attention to movements of the company... I heard they were setting up clinics inside larger corporations and for things like drug testing etc ...and employee health maintenance. I went online to see how far reaching it was and lo and behold... there was evidence everywhere... Know what else I bought? Siemens, because of the high speed railroad that broke ground under Obama, this company had a few subcontracts related to the high-speed railroad -so I bought a piece of their company. Not much, a few shares. but enough to play around with and make cash. I invested in chinese bonds (yuan) via EFT retail because they (PRC) hold a lot of U.S. debt and I followed a lot of American companies such as caterpillar who were investing in building China at their rate of exchange... Since I had gone clothes shopping in Beijing a few times I realized how much U.S. dollars could buy in RMBs (their currency)and I thought holy crap - American companies are making out like fat cats because they could buy so much more... then I noticed how the Chinese were playing with the U.S. treasury by lowering their currency's value and by the way- that was reported in the U.S. media but no one was paying attention because everyone here is focused on the fuckin' kardashians. So U.S. media stopped reported on it. I turned to Bloomberg.... they tell you who is moving the crowd and why the crowd is moving" It's not market manipulation - it's people manipulation and now Bloomberg is a media empire that is taking over the world ...but folks are paying attention to google whose product is an address bar. I just noticed that bloomberg law is a thing... that is getting ready to overtake LexisNexis (RELX) ( correction* I believe it already has but don't quote me on it) but I digress....that's a whole other story. Troy, nothing is rocket science except rocket science and even that is dependent on how we measure time... - the stock market is exactly what it is a market... you buy and sell everything. But you have to pay attention to what you're buying. You have to decide if you are going to let someone do your thinking for you - or are you going to pay attention. President Obama enacted a law to protect the consumers.... and it did. Now we have 45 taking away the very protections that you just mentioned will screw us all... so yes, you are right. I have to make people care to understand. (I love that line) So Troy if I can make you care then my job is done because you are a champion of black people... and you will echo my voice. And you'll tell them the only trickery is diversion - distracting your attention like a sleight of the hand from what matters.

@Troy yes, THAT WAS ME!!! It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye lol... I couldn't keep it up which is why I said "No" every time. These young black women today, don't play those games when it comes to dating to marry - they show up warts and all.... and that's why it's difficult for them to make a covenant with a black man. As @Cynique mentioned black men don't have to accept black women as they are -(paraphrasing) there are too many other women willing to play to the black man's personality weaknesses and trust that is exactly what I was doing to - I was playing to the man's weakness not his strength... to get him to propose. As I said though, I couldn't keep it up and weakness (both mine and his) is not something you want to build a relationship on. When I did get married, I had never put on act because I didn't think I wanted to marry my husband .. so he saw me for me...but marriage is whole other story... Marriage is quite unnatural but is a great experiment of merging two personalities into one... especially if you're totally open and don't hide anything. It gets really good when you actually see the other person...not their habits because that's not them but see them as they are at the core. That's when marriage is perfect and desirable.

There is no bar of entry to the stock market... for the same amount of a mcdonald's big breakfast anyone can make a trade...in fact, black think tank are encouraging black people to diversify their investments - while home ownership is still the biggest asset to wealth building it is not the only one. President Obama's dodd-frank law (Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act )made it safe for consumers to invest in the market while not getting taken advantage.. The House just voted to repeal that law That's why you go to the source... court records, government periodicals, legislative proposals, etc... all on-line and available And we trying to build a business really appreciate this information... I use your information as almost gospel ... but I still continue to research it. Your information is my starting point though. Thank you, @Troy, I've been tempted to do a "side column" on government as it relates to black people.. It feels like no one cares though... they want opinions and I just want them to make their own decisions. I think maybe sharing the possible benefits or harm might not be biased it - but rather a way for folks to use the laws, and executive orders... maybe then more of us see the benefits it might help us get interested in government

@Troy YOU CAN'T. You have to do your own research. I understand not having the time but you have to make time to be informed. It really is that important. Just like you take the time to research social media and its effects on small business you have to make the time to research the legislative, executive and judicial activities going on in Washington, D.C. and the world... and then with this forum encourage others especially black people to do the same... Then they aren't informed... I have no opinion of President Obama, I have an evidence of his actions.

@Troy, Maybe you didn't read my post and part of the conversation that @Cynique is referring to.. - This thread, you've started, talks about black women believing they can't find a good black man. ... I didn't think that was true but I did explain how I had to become the "ideal" to get those proposals ... Thank you. My bestie, didn't sacrifice any of her personality to become "marriage material".. most black woman as @Cynique mentioned are no longer willing to sacrifice self just to get a proposal. They rather black men meet them where they are -- and deal with them from there. This post, as I've read, so far doesn't discuss post marriage proposal and engagement...right?

@Troy , OMG I was literally out of the country for all Obama Administration - and it seems I've forgotten more of what you actually know about the Obama administration. of course I knew of President Obama, flicking away the tears over sandy hook massacre ...this is what I mean by blind spot. How can you not watch the movement of a person who holds so much power. As much as I hate 45* is president I don't miss anything he does... I pay attention to his cabinet picks what they hell they're involved in, bills that are up for vote in congress, budgets executives orders and sadly his dummass tweets, ... Where are you???? - I'm going to go out on a limb say I already know more about the Trump administration than you do. Maybe it's because you are a championed of books and shun broadcast and social media but there's information that is presented in real time in print, that you can peruse to make an INFORMED opinion. hell sign up for government email - both houses send out email of what goes on in the day to do - every government department allows you to sign up for email of their day-to-day - we still live in an open government democracy it's hard not to have facts. Thank goodness for@Cynique ! - now i understand why you wrote you weren't going to vote... you are not participating!!!! None of this, including the "Weak" moniker many men have assigned to President Obama is lost on me... but I've already written here in this thread I don't waste my time "researching" opinions. Opinions are irrelevant without facts or evidence. Obama is a self-proclaimed Feminist - get over it ...but it does not make him weak by definition. AGAIN , where is your evidence regarding the black community being in dire straits.. I deal in facts, and the most impoverished ethnic group in america is still the white community by $10,000 per capita. Obama Administration passed quite a few laws, enacted initiatives, propped up the stock market (I even made money) signed executive orders that would return the black community hit hard by the 2008 recession back to whole...during Obama Administration there were more black women employed than ever in history , more high school graduates and a robust admissions in colleges with pell grant money in the billions which cut down on student loans - or and I forgot under the obama administration the us dept of education stopped pilling on the interest to money already borrowed. 45* s budget already took aim at reversing it. Yes, the black community got hit hard by the 2008 recession but it wasn't created by the Obama Administration however as I've linked to all over this conversation and other discussions here how his administration helped the black community. 42 Million strong, the black community spends as much as the country of Australia; economically speaking we have the money to spend. So, I'm unsure what you're referring to when you speak to "dire straits" . Any think tank report available today, has now taken the focus off of poverty and now focusing on wealth building in the black community. We're now out of the impoverished column to looking for ways to close in on the wealth gap.

@Cynique This statement is so funny too me . One of my best friends , a life-long single-no children-petite-gorgeous-wealthy-professionally-successful-woman, refused to sacrifice her personality for any man. She had a blooming love life but only dated a black man once, and that's when she closing up the legal affairs on her parents estate. She hired him to close up one of her homes in Philly... ... She'd later confess to me she was in an weakened state. He had a daughter, she adored, the little girl's name was "Destiny," which held a special significance for her. She would "study" the man's baby mama "...In fact, you would have thought she was Jane Goddall the way she observed and reported on black men. She observed and thought black women would have to be contortionists, to deal with black men. It was funny to me at the time because her observation was my "normal". I worked as a marketer in my professional life and it carried over to my persona;. Sadly, if my experience serves as evidence - then I'd have to agree, black women would have to sacrifice self - and that too could be a reason they're salty. When the woman, I spoke of above passed away, I changed a lot of things in my life and it included stopping the charade and contortionist act in my dating.. Needless to say my dating love life changed drastically. I wish I can say I care but I don't. Today, I show up in all my relationships, life is too long to sacrifice or hide any part of me .

Twin, @Delano, I had to give you props! You hit 2-3 of my soft spots! I'm a nerd, nerd-lover and I'm a dancing queen...I don't drink, do drugs or smoke but I will go clubbing to dance the night away. When I worked as a flight attendant, during one Denver layover, I met up with a facebook friend and he took me to this place called the "beauty bar " OMG!!! The DJ played old school soul music from 9 - 2 am! I never left the floor. The next day, I had a flight back to O'Hare, I told the Captain I had danced all night at this club. Don't you know when I deplaned, I was met for a drug test!!! Dude ratted me out but I was clean - and still floating that I had an opportunity to get my dance on.

@Troy In May 2017, the former president, Mr. Obama pledged and donated 2 MILLION DOLLARS "toward two Chicago programs that provide summer jobs and apprenticeships," Mr. Obama "cited the city's violence and the need to "reach young people who might be at risk if they don't have something to do during the summers." THAT IS PERSONAL CASH FROM THE OBAMAS !!! Maybe you should start researching and "Stop talking" when it relates to Barack Obama. Every time you refer to him you make it clear that you don't know of his accomplishments as president nor do you know of his activities now that he's left office. There's an obvious blind spot when it comes to him so maybe you should leave him out of your conversation.

Wait? @Troy How did I get into this one LOL! I was doing my best to stay out of this controversial topic. But since you called my name... the last year I was proposed to by a black man was 2013... and practically every year prior to that of my adult years. Well, not while I was married. I was off the market then. But even before my divorce was final it was a white man who proposed that year. But I do know what this woman is talking about, unfortunately, and I've dated some real "good black man catches" ... In fact, one GBM couldn't make it into town but put me on his guest list for one these exclusive club here in Atlanta. He wanted me to go and enjoy myself with everything on his account. It was all arranged I just couldn't see myself going on a date alone because I knew what type of life I was setting myself up for. But that's the level he was operating on... . I've dated some trashy BM/WM/LM too. I married a white man but he was exactly what I needed in my life at the time. I needed to get over my black baby daddy who was the love of my life but our affair was far too tumultuous for my maturity level. Still, to this day, I would label him a good black man. We were just star-crossed. I've dated the UN since I was 16 years old and then my boyfriend was a bona fide Alabama white cracker and we were in love. So maybe that's why the sisters are salty - they've only dated or waited for Black Knights and for me knights come in different shades of black - from light white to dark black. I stay away from married men but like @Cynique mentioned they are an easy pick. I learned a few years ago, I'm not as open as I thought I was. I like honesty and I was hedging (I think that's the correct term) into in a polyamorous relationship when I figured out, I don't like to share men. I'm not a jealous type though I'm a serial monogamist. But chile puh-lease, don't get me started. I love the inner intensity of black men - they smolder white hot internally,and are exciting! White men burn hot externally and Latin men are just fire (too much fire to be exact and us as a couple is dangerous liaison because I have a bad temper when unleashed.) I came close to dating an Asian man but I can't remember why it didn't continue. I learned getting any of those dudes to propose means you practically must become a chameleon and morph into their ideal... I was good at that which is why I got so many proposals but from my experience black men were the most difficult to convert from single to married. I did turn a few but they were the most difficult. Maybe it's because black men are used to down home cooking and the other men aren’t. I made mashed potatoes, green beans, pork chops smothered in an onion gravy for the white guy (One I mentioned up there) he disappeared for about two-three weeks -I thought damn maybe I shouldn't have cooked for him. When he resurfaced, it was with a proposal with conditions. I had to promise to give him one son. I was like dude I have 3 daughters and there's no guarantee and I just can't take that chance. So, we ended. Most of my relationships ended when it came to the prospect of having more children or me keeping up the charade. There are very few men I know of any shade that are interested in marrying fat and out of shape women. I know some women don't like to hear that but for most of men, aesthetics matter - men like looking at and waking up to pretty...just like women like looking at and waking up to gorgeous/handsome. So, I don't know why any of us trip when it comes to looks. Anyway, what I've learned about black men is what most married women know. The BM I’ve dated don't want to be controlled or conquered they want to be won over. That's a dance within itself. The fact that those men on the panel have been married multiple times speaks to this point. Black Men want to be married (I learned that the hard way). It's been my experience that most men want to be married. So, not sure what this battle is going on between the sheets... and that woman's statistics don't match the U.S. census figures - so she may be talking about eligible single BM with a certain amount of wealth and education in comparison to women of equal stature.

@Troy Actually, I liked your little survey. I'm like my twin - I have an appreciation for numbers, data and stats. Further It was fascinating that the larger surveyed mirrored our sample...

Now that's the book I want to read!

The only time I don't discount large percentages or numbers is when I'm selling something, looking at the scale, my debt ratio, bank account or when people are taking action. The rest of the time opinions are irrelevant.. I find people are woefully ignorant in large numbers - and agreement makes people unbelievably lazy. By the way, while it's true that less than 40 percent of ELIGIBLE voters went for trump ... He WON with than 45 percent of people who cast a ballot . You proved my point - paying attention to a percentage of number of people who are inactive is a waste of time.

@Cynique You know, that is a good point!!

I agree with you @Troy, I didn't know that so many women didn't know about their own bodies until I got to myspace. And worse it seemed that a lot of women never learned from their moms. Many seem to take their cues from men - Anyway, that's how a lot of relationship experts started to thrive in the age of "social media" I used to belong to this facebook co-ed group and it would get super steamy and incredibly educational and liberating for both women and men. Sometimes brothers would post pics of their woman's discharge and the women would tell the brothers what was really going on depending on the quality of the "biological waste". Growing up in my family, the matriarchs, were very open about teaching us girl youngins' age-appropriate lessons about our bodies. Sex was never a taboo subject. It's a tradition that the women in my family continue. ..my poor daughters would sometime say TMI when I start in or certain topics... they would about die when my mother chimed in... she's the worst when it comes to vivid descriptions lol. As for men learning how to satisfy women - and vice versa, that's an integral part of intimacy... If you can't tell your man or woman what is satisfying - why are you two even together? (Hypothetical question. I'm not targeting you or anyone)

Th Rounding error in favor of... the majority? Ok. We didn't learn much more - between the five of us we came up with the nearly the same results. I think Cynique and I agreed it wasn't racist but we differed on how flattering the pic was. white folks chiming in provided another voice - but I didn't think we'd get a consensus . "Racism" is a social construct and unless it denies someone of rights, it becomes nuanced and has to be added to other acts to feel its effect.