Chevdove

@Cynique This is too funny! You know though that if you are alien, then we are all aliens! LOL. Your RH-negative Type "O" blood is only one aspect of this alien presence and I told you I was told I had blue eyes when I was born. And, I have had red hair for years until it began to darken. LOL. But I am not broadcasting my blue eyes at all, though! LOL. I KEEPS DAT on the down low. LOL. You are most welcome, my brother! @Pioneer1 Are you speaking in reference to my story? If so, then, yes, my husband's grandmother was MIXED RACED. But due to her 'racist' mother marrying an Indian and abusing her in that way about her father, she obviously did not like it and guess what? She grew up and met and married another Native American! LOL! So, while my husband's grandmother was mixed-raced, though she did the same thing that her 'racist mother' did and marry 'an Indian' and, it was not necessarily out of love, but women back in those days married due to needing to financially taken care of and they had been passed over by the kind of men that they really wanted. My husband's grandmother would always say that her 'racist' mother hated the INDIAN that she married. She would tell us that the woman would always refer to her husband as 'THAT OLE INDIAN'. LOL. But then, I touched upon it briefly, by saying that this same grandmother of my husband was also defined as being 'racist'. She had 13 kids! Most of her kids were very light skinned but a few of them came out dark like her Native American husband and also her genes from her Native father and, she did show that she had problems with COLORISM herself. One of her sons, was dubeed 'the Black One' and it was he that said in my very presence, "Mama is racist". So true. Yeah, but this is too difficult, IMO. Therefore, I don't really agree. Culture has a lot to do with how people are identified too. Therefore, by expecting people to identify as being Mixed-raced, biracial and etc. can be disrespectful in some regards. Some biracial people and mixed raced people do cosign onto ther Black culture and become much more beneficial to the Black cultures than Black people who are possessed with issues of Self-Hatred!

@NubianFellow Thank you for breaking this down! Until now, I couldn't find the actual story. But I just read in the tabloids, yesterday, that he has returned to the set of that show, I think it's called, Empire. And I also read yesterday that the FBI has been requested to investigate the charges on his behalf. I'm not sure though. I only read briefly. But now, after your post, I am wondering if this is all some kind of hype that is coming from certain groups who want to draw more support for the LBGT cause and to connect this to Black Americans. I am wondering about this process due to this show called Empire, that I have heard about. I heard that the show is suppose to be really good, but i have no interest in watching it right now.

@Pioneer1 I absolutely agree with you!!! Here, by brother, you are talking truth!!! the term 'BLACK-WHITE' woman is truth!!! and vice versa too. There are a lot of BLACK-WHITE men in the African American culture that use their traits to deceive us and put out the White Supremacist format. THANK YOU PIONEER!!! OMG! But again, you are attacking Mel as if she is this profile and I tell you that, in this, you are wrong and you are being disrespectful. Yes, and don't leave out African men from that continent too. They also obssess over White women. But no, Pioneer, here, you are missing the major point. The Latina and ARab women don't comdemn their men, in that I do agree, but it is because they too, have a problem with their identity. They believe that they are White and define themselves as being 'White' on applications! But when it comes to Black women in Africa and here, we are most damaged by Black AFrican men who obsess over White women. In this you are so wrong. We have been enslaved due to the global effort to divide and conquer the Black man and woman... this is the very process and this is why when Black men do this, it is most oppressive. Go back and read what @Del wrote. I have no problem recalling!!! I do agree that you deserve a testimony from me and Black women on this score, and again, I have offered one and you completely brushed me off!!!--- as if you don't agree. smh. You are clearly showing the very process in how Black women have been completely oppressed by Black men!!! LOL! Come on Pioneer; wake up! Please read this statement @Pioneer1

@Mel Hopkins What!? Really? Wait a minute--Really!? Now, this is deep, a deep insight. @Pioneer1 I do look forward to your response here. You have requested some responses from me and Mel regarding personal issues on our position of 'abusive Black men' and I responded to you that, it is difficult to make responses but I have responded in this very thread!!! However, you have made no replies, so why should I bring up another case!? That makes no sense. Please respond to my first testimony and then, we will go from there. But no, I don't have any doubt that you don't love Black women. I feel this from you, but I do agree that you have some deep issues about your past relationships and you may be superimposing your experiences onto us! Oh but for now, I feel you my brother and really appriciate you deep insights. @Delano Thank for you insight too! OMG! @Delano So true. @Mel Hopkins Oh no. @Troy Did not reply to me at all. He made a blanket statement about 'King James" and I responded and he completely ignored me, brushed me off. @Pioneer1 I did read what Delano wrote, encouraging her to share her stories, but you miss the fact that he did not push the issue. I understand too though what you are saying, in that, we owe you, as a Black man, some kind of explanation, and I do agree. But, I have offered a testimony and you have brushed it off!!!--completely!!! It is so amazing how, some Black men pretend to be so 'together' and 'respectful' to Black women... LOL... This is the problem!!! @Pioneer1 Please tell me that you are joking!!! You have completely ignored the mental and emotional abuse and etc that causes much deeper wounds than physical. Come on!!! Tell me that you didn't mean that! Yes you did. And here lies the deep truth. You are trying to use one Black woman's offered experience to fit in your personal life's experiences that has caused you to be prejudice against the sum of Black women.

African and Native American Hair-type; THE COMB TEST One key historical mark that reveals issues of Colorism that existed in the Native American world would be a practice that became known as ‘the Comb Test’. Perhaps there has been some publications with regards to this subject but, my account would only be based on a personal experience. Nevertheless, as it was explained to me, this practice was common and widespread at least on the east coast of the States. However, there has been a serious mis-education when it comes to the whole truth about what life was like for millions of people who lived in North America before the coming of Columbus and the Colonial Movement. Even though the Native American world consisted of many different kinds of natives however, today we have been conditioned to define the American Indians (ie. Native Americans) by European construct. But sometimes when I look at my husband, who happens to be a ‘Black Indian’, I sometimes think about how back during the Civil Rights times, a common racist shout against Black people was to ‘Go Back to Africa’ and now, the deception becomes apparent. Because of this European tactic to ‘Divide & Conquer’, based on issues of Colorism as well as many other methods, the reality of Colorism that had already occurred amongst the native peoples became even more of a confusion. My husbands people though, mark both the ancient history and the more recent American Indian history too. As a Negro Indian [i.e. Black Indian], my husband reveals that not all people with nappy hair identifies with the term ‘Africa’ as it applies to the Mid-Atlantic African Slave Trade. For a certainty, all modern humans originated OUT OF AFRICA at one point in time, but also, just like many different kinds of people who are from other continents and countries all over the world and who have no known recent historical link to Africa, nevertheless, there are a significant presence of Native American Indians that fit todays physical description of ‘an African’ but have no recent historical link to Africa at all. Because their cultures were almost wiped out, therefore, some of them have intermixed with African Americans, have chosen to blend, or conveniently allowed people to define them as African Americans but many of them are not direct descendants. Over time, African American Descendants of Slaves have been made to absorb many other kinds of people into our culture and therefore, in order to better understand issues of Self-Hate and Colorism that has plagued us, it may be good to look deeper into our origins and formations. Following, will be four brief personal accounts with some of my relations that may better help to understand how, perhaps, the notion of ‘GOOD HAIR-BAD HAIR’ has been connected to Colorism and White Supremacy and used to classify Black African-typed people as being inferior to others. 1. My husband’s paternal grandmother. She would be defined as ‘a Straight-Haired North American Indian’ woman. He took me to visit her from time to time, before and after we married and it was always enriching because, she was always willing to talk and share a lot about her life. But she was also very frank, abrupt and sometimes crude to the point that some of her grandchildren became offended and would not visit her. On one visit she told me that she remembered ‘the Trail of Tears’. She said that she was very young but remembered it very well. She was led out by hand with her people as they were forced marched out of their lands westwards to become a part of a Cherokee Reservation. She was not Cherokee though, but Sioux, however, there was no designated reservation for the Sioux, so for the many that were caught in the North Carolina woodlands, they were force marched to Cherokee lands. On another visit she told my husband and I about ‘the Comb Test’ and said that this was a common practice. She said it became incorporated into her Church and when a visitor would want to join the congregation, the preacher would then call that person up to the front of the church! She further explained that the preacher would pull out a comb and then run the comb through the hair of the person and if they did not have ‘STRAIGHT-TYPED HAIR’, they could not become a member of their church community. I fell back… LOL. She told us this story with a straight and stern face. I asked her was she serious and she confirmed. On yet another occasion, she came to visit her son, my father-in-law. And as the family gathered around the table, I decided to ask her a question because I felt that her presence was so unique in how she compared to my father-in-law; her son. I said to her, “you have a beautiful skin tone but why is it that you are darker than your son and most of your children? She immediately smiled at me and then she threw her head back and paused. Then she looked straight forward, and it was almost as if she went into a trance. She looked as if she went far back in time and in her imagination while she was speaking of a very traumatic time in her childhood. She said, “I know. I am also darker than both of my brothers. I was my mother’s only daughter and she hated me.” Then she said that one day when she was a little girl, her mother punished her for not washing the dishes. Her mother led her outside and made her stay outside on the swing in the sun for a long time and ever since that time, her mother would tell her that she became dark because she was a bad girl. I could tell that her mind went back to that very experience and it seemed as if she was ‘that little girl’. But then after she told the story, she ‘came to’. Then she looked at me and said, she hated her mother and did not miss her after she died. She had no remorse. OMG! Anyway… fast forward … to one of her own sons, that was dubbed, the black one and he said that she was racist. My husband said that whenever they would go to visit this woman, his great-grandmother, who was a White woman, she would line all the children up—by color—LOL. My husband was always in the back! 2. THE POW WOW—I learned by going to Pow Wows that many of the East Coast Natives adopt spiritual names that relate to a significant event in their life or based on the nature of animals common to their environment. So in the western parts of America the natives may adopt spirit names connected to perhaps the buffalo, bull, horse, coyote, or etc. And in the east coast, some natives refer to the fox, squirrel, rat (swamp rat), beaver, deer, and etc. There are many different tribal people from all over America and I met a native, a Straight-haired-Indian, who told me an interesting story that made me realize that I had mis-judged my husband who spoke about this very topic. So, I need to go back to the story that my husband had told me about some of his father’s people. He would constantly tell me how some of his relatives would have a particular hair-type but then all of a sudden, it would completely change. He said that he had an uncle who was young and had very tight curly hair and then he got sick and was hospitalized but, afterwards, his hair became bone straight. And, he continued to tell me other similar stories repeatedly until, I got sick and tired of it. One day, I told him, “Negro Please! You don’t have to worry about your hair changing as nappy as it is. Be sure, it won’t change at all. Smh!” I didn’t believe it but then, when I went to the Pow Wow, this native man told me the same kind of story. I have since learned that there is such an occurrence in that some people do have this happening in that their hair will change texture or, they have a distinct combination-type hair texture, and not due to old age, but it is a commonality that occurs across the world in certain ethnic groups. This makes me wonder of the useless purpose of ‘the Comb Test’. 3. BLACKFEET Comb Test—My husband’s father lived in the Piedmont area and his people have a long history in this region. However, some of the decision that he made was spurred by the government’s programs aimed at wiping out the Native Americans. He marks a very crucial and historical time of conflict that revolved around the World Wars. The Federal government passed a law known as the Racial Integrity Act (RIA) in order to deal the American Indians and the federal reports concluded on the repercussions of this law years later. Initially, the natives had three choices; (1) they could be defined as White if they were light skinned enough, (2) they had to remain on reservations if they still wanted to be listed as Natives, or (3) they had to be defined as ‘Colored’ and be defined with the Negro ‘race’ if they signed up for the military. In general, and as a result of this RIA, the federal government documents later reported that almost 90% of the Native American men married White women and completely left the reservations and became ‘White’ if they could pass (this is what my father-in-law’s, father chose to do, but he was too dark skinned to pass as White). Only a few natives remained on the reservations and as a result many of them that remained became very impoverished. And finally, there was a small percentage of natives that were aggressive and did not want to be defined as White nor chose to remain on the reservations, therefore, they bonded with the African American community; and this is what my father-in-law chose to do. However, he married a part-Blackfeet woman. My husband’s mother, at my first glance, appeared to be an African American woman, but the story behind the picture of her grandmother displayed in her house was about a woman that came from Montana, was forced out of Blackfeet country with her people who faced harsh times of starvation. They were driven at first to Nebraska, and then some of them were taken by wagonloads further east to Maryland. My husband’s mother was a little girl at the same time that some famous Blackfeet Indians were being pressed hard by the government and were resisting annihilation. Black-and-White photos captured some of the Blackfeet Indians during the 1930s and there was one famous depiction of a Blackfeet on a subway rail in the Capital. But the very brief written documents about the Blackfeet Indians has been severely White washed and painted a very different view of a much bigger story! The oral story about the Blackfeet Indians has some color to it! Although my husband’s mother has that same distinct forehead that I see in a lot of pictures of Blackfeet Indians, her hair was also nappy, no doubt due to being intermixed on the east coast, however, there are small bits and pieces of early stories of the Blackfeet that does include the African presence before the Great Starvation. And also unfortunately, my mother-in-law conducted her own ‘Comb-Test’ amongst her own children and grandchildren. She made a point of announcing to me and her own son, my husband, that our firstborn baby would not be lucky enough to have ‘hair like Papa’. Both of our sons were born and grew nappy hair like her and all of her children and grandchildren. And like my husband, who has the same prominent forehead and hairline as she did, one of my sons were born with the same traits. Our first son developed some physical features of the Sioux while our younger son developed some physical features of the Blackfeet. 4. THE ETHIOPIAN YOUNG MEN—As a Biology Major, my further research began with my personal stories about my family here as an African American Descendant of Slaves. Yet, even though, through by son’s paternal line, they are Third Generation Native Indians starting with my father-in-law and Second-Generation Black Indians, and come from a long line of Natives, however, their maternal links to Africa through myself becomes the Agar that makes them so complete. The American government has damaged and fragmented the American Indian populations so intensely that the Black Indian Identity is almost gone. For this reason, and as my sons grew up, I became so happy to see their African traits develop. I enjoyed taking my sons to the barber shop to get the trendy African American haircut styles such as the High top, Box Cut, fade, and corn rolling their hair. I remember how all the Black young men grew out their afros over the summer and turned up in school for the 7th grade with these large ‘Jackson 5 afros’. And I could see that my older son began to look like my maternal origins more and more, as he grew up. He looked to me like East Africans, but I had no idea that he would receive this same confirmation from many East African and Middle Eastern people! I remember one day that we went to dine at a buffet restaurant in North Carolina and a rather large group of Ethiopian young men came into the restaurant to eat. They walked passed our table and sat over near the window and they were close enough so that their conversations in a foreign tongue could easily be heard as they talked amongst themselves. I noticed that they looked a lot like my son who was sitting at the table with us. But then my thoughts were confirmed by those men that day. At one point, my son stood up because he wanted to go to the sushi bar and he turned and began to walk towards their table because it was in the pathway of the direction to the sushi bar. As my son began to walk briskly towards that direction, the men stopped talking abruptly and looked directly at my son, and three of them immediately stood straight up and began to reach out their hand as if to shake hands with my son. Meanwhile, my son, who had no clue what was transpiring, kept on walking past their table and so, the three men looked baffled and then they slowly sat down and continued speaking in another language. Apparently, they must have assumed my son was going to greet them. I was so amazed at how much he looked like those young Ethiopian men, but it was not until I did more research that I could really appreciate his traits. And as he grew up, however, there was one unique trait that he began to express that really caught me by surprise. My oldest son went off to college and moved into the dormitory community when he was about twenty. But it was only a few weeks later that he told me that he had decided to cut his braids and get a barber shop cut. So, a few days later, I drove up to the campus to visit him and I was taken by surprise to see his new look. He opened the passenger car door and sat down in the car and my mouth dropped open as I gazed at his profile and look at his Mediterranean typed nose. … I said, “Okay, what happened to your hair!!!” He did a silent laugh and said, “I don’t know.” Then I said, “Where are your naps!? What happened to your hair!? It is BONE SRAIGHT! OMG! You look like a Gypsy. You’ve got a White woman’s bump in your nose. What am I going to tell you father? He is going to joke me! … I ran my fingers through his hair. So much for ‘the Comb Test!’ smh. To this day, my oldest son’s hair has no naps. When he grows it out, it is very, very Black and has soft big straight-type curls but, nonetheless, there are no naps!—at all! His hair texture resembles many Ethiopians in that he has a combination type hair texture. He lost the bushy afro that he used to have. His hairline has receded, and he looks like he could be one of Haile Selassie’s sons. Umh. What a thought. Well, I wrote some of my personal experiences with respect to ‘African traits’ [i.e. ???] because of the deeper research that I have done with regards to the ancient scripts of the distant past and to better explain the problems of today that has arisen due to issues of Self-Hatred and Colorism that has plagued the world. These four personal experiences are sort of an introduction to a better understanding of the past.

I love this! So, when I think about 'beyond the physical' then I am wondering if this can have something to do with 'deep visions'. But now, I am going to have to look into what the term 'esoteric' means.

@Mel Hopkins You are so right. Again, you are so right. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!!!!!!!!! Oh Gosh! I needed this!!!!!!! Thank you so much!!!! Oh Wow! Okay, I am probably wrong, but I actually thought that Shakespeare may have had some cultural connection to being 'Black' and that was why I love that quote. I read somewhere that the other poets did not like him. They called him an Upstart CROW. And they did not like it that the queen of England liked him! And lastly, some of his writings were based of of the Bible, I think either Songs of Solomon or Psalms or something like that. Okay, @Troy Since you saw the need in mentioning a 'book' King James commisioned, it is okay if I comment in response? "Beliefs one holds usually have nothing to do with reason or logic"? Well, when I compare: [1] Trump's Maga platform [2] the 'book' King James Commissioned, and [3] your assessment in that 'usually' ones belief has nothing to do with reason or logic, then I think about this; Trump's life is less than 100 years, your life is less then 100 years, King James life was less than 100 years, but the 'collection of books' that the king commissioned to be translated by a body of learned people, books that had been written by over 100s of people over the course of thousands of years, I guess you are right in your assessment in regards to people's beliefs usually not based on any sound reason or logic.

Wait-a-minute, I think I wrote about this incident in this very thread? Yes, this may be true but, they do not have the same history that we have and this is very important. That is just crazy wrong! LOL! I don't watch TV that much but I have seen shows in which it is commonplace in how Black men obsess over non-Black women and I don't see this coming from any other race/culture! You don't see the connection to 'oppression' in this regard? AGain, PIoneer, this is so wrong. At one point in the past, someone was able to come into Africa and set up human slavery and therefore, this process begins within our circles for what ever reason. Black men were not protecting their people for some reason. I agree! And it happens both ways though, sadly, IMO. It happens both ways, we, as BLack men and women demean each other in this mode and I suppose that may have been one of the reasons we were overpowered and enslaved.

@Pioneer1 That's funny that you coined the hype 'fake outrage'. I think today there are so many other more important issues that this media hype was not that important either and it may have been hyped up, but however, this tactic, in ancient times is one of the very modes of how we as Black-African-typed people have been conquered. And so, I can understand why I am not making sense to you about 'a white women coming into a Black environment and presenting themselves in a fashion that the Black kings would NOT ALLOW THEIR OWN WOMANKING TO DO. I can understand why you and perhaps many other Black men still today cannot recognize this issue as a method of White Supremacy and in how they were eventually overthrown. So, I guess, I will leave off from this scenario. But, before I do completely, I think that this very thread sort of touches upon what I am addressing. Many Black women today wear 'White women hair textures--that are NOT growing from our scalps and this was introduced to us, not only through modern slavery but a long time ago, in Africa and elsewhere. And now, we Black women are being bashed by many Black men that do not take responsibility for their part in this trend. NubianFEllow does speak on this though, he does say how Black men share apart in this issue. If Black men obssess over non-African traits in the presence of their own womankind then that is a form of White Idolation--White Supremacy, and from this too, some Black men harbor hatred and rejection against BLack women who do not have 'good hair' or 'curly hair'; That is a form of White Supremacy. We as Black people can also be defined as being 'White Supremacist' and that is why I don't feel that you should charge other INDIVIDUALS and attack them for issues that you feel are White Supremacist beliefs. Pioneer, we all have to deal with issues of racism and have to sift through the kind of people, Black, White or other, that are spritually whole or not. LOL. You are so off track, IMO. I just can't understand why your are reading into this. Everyone has a different experience and meet various people along the pathway of life. Do you think that Black African Americans should not marry out of their race/culture? If a Strong White man or Strong Black man is attracted to a woman and marries her, then the woman should feel that this man is 'the best man for her'. For a White man to marry out of his race or a Black man to marry out of his race is a conscious step in this world and due to how horrible this system as been, a man would have to be strong IMO when it comes to these choices; that is how I feel. I a non-African man asked me to marry him (of which has happened to me!), I would know that he is making a strong stance about his manhood. There are so many ways that @Mel Hopkins statement could be viewed, IMO and I do feel that you are imposing your ideals on her due to issues that you, as a Black man has come across. You're right! I have been dodging! And, I do have some personal stories but, I am trying to figure out how to write them down and am wrestling with some thoughts for certain reasons. For one, I did share a personal story in another thread and I feel that was a very good response to this topic!!!--But you may not have read it or agreed! Another reason I am slow to respond is because I have a problem speaking about certain issues about Black men because--I did not come into this community with the goal to speak against Black men-- therefore, I am trying to figure out how to speak about this kind of 'Black Disrespect coming from Black men to wards me as a Black woman' in such a way that it will not be detrimental as a whole. @Pioneer1 Another reason why I have not responded to you about this is because, it hurts deeply, as in the story that I did share in another thread. It is very demeaning when a Black man attacks a Black woman and in that story that I told, had it not been for other kind of men that responded to me positively, it would have been impossible to have a healthy self-esteem in that environment that I was a part of.

The DIVINE FEMININE? The COSMIC MOTHER-- METAPHYSICS I don't know if you are contradicting or not. In one sense you say there are no saviors/leaders but then, your book is about 'a leader', the Cosmic Mother who is our beginning creator? Sounds confusing. So, after I read the comments, as of now, I still don’t have a good understanding of ‘Metaphysics’ so therefore, I decided to do a brief google and try to understand. Well, after doing this, I now wonder what was the intended purpose for this subject and also, the ‘goddess aspect’ of this book. I know some people do not like Wikipedia, but I confirmed their statements from other links as well so this is a quick description of what I have gotten. The first part of the definition says this: Metaphysics is the branch of philosophy that examines the fundamental nature of reality, including the relationship between mind and matter, …. [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysics But after reading much farther into this topic and searching other links, I did not see anything in reference to “MATTER” and this supposed aspect of Metaphysics. Am I missing something? So it seems to me that Metaphysics is simply ‘A BRANCH OF PHILOSOPHY’ and therefore is about some form of thought on how things have come to exist and interact with the material world and, in this I have a problem with Metaphysics being a primary focus. It’s as if this subject is all about understanding ‘how we exist’ but does not even attempt to address ‘how we have come to exist’ and ‘how matter has come to exist’. It’s like being a slave, a smart educated slave, arguing on philosophy during a break from working in the cotton field, meanwhile the master is forcing the slaves get back to work to pick his cotton and clean his mansion and drive his carriage…’ Then I read this: The word “metaphysics” comes from two Greek words that, together, literally mean “after or behind or among the [study of] the natural”. … https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysics Uh oh. So is this a Greek invention or creation or whatever? It seems after reading much further that this subject became important at the time of the White Civilizations—which is the Greeks of the Classical Age—and they formed this based upon other ancient foreign ideals that they coined during their rise. In other words, After the material world was well developed in the ancient Black civilizations thousands of years prior, the Classical Greeks formed this Metaphysical philosophy of thought; or am I wrong? They used ancient ideas such as the ‘Ka’ and ‘Ba’ and formulated ancient ideas into their philosophy of thought. But none of this has anything to do with the wider spectrum of how the material world came to be. Topics of metaphysical investigation include existence, objects and their properties, space and, time, cause and effect, and possibility. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysics Again, it seems that Metaphysics deals with ‘existence’ as it is and their properties but does not address how things came to be. Mind and matter [edit] Accounting for the existence of mind in a world otherwise composed of matter is a metaphysical problem which is so large and important as to have become a specialized subject of study in its own right, philosophy of mind. … https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysics Uh uh, it is a problem, a real big problem that as of yet has not been explained. Rejections of metaphysics [edit] A number of individuals have suggested that much or all of metaphysics should be rejected…. In the eighteenth century, David Hume took a strong position, arguing that all genuine knowledge involves either mathematics or matters of fact and that metaphysics, which goes beyond these, is worthless. …. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysics So then, another link at the end of this article lead me to perceive that there maybe something else I need to look at in order to understand this thread: IDENTITY AND CHANGE and also FEMINIST METAPHYSICS. Where metaphysics tries to explain what is the universe and what it is like, feminist metaphysics questions how metaphysical answers have supported sexism. [1] Are ideas we have about fundamental subjects like: the self, mind and body, nature, essence, and identity formed with gendered bias? … https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminist_metaphysics Immediately, I see the flaw in this paragraph in that ‘Metaphysics does not try to explain what is the universe’ from what I have gathered so far. But more importantly, I immediately answer the question about gender biasness as – YES!—IMO, The initial gender should be FEMALE or rather BOTH, but that is not what this Metaphysics seems to point at but it seems to take a defensive approach to address a present world whereby MALE gender is primary but also incorrect. And after reading further, it seems to me that there is a gender purpose for this thread that may be based upon this earlier coined subject matter of ‘FEMINIST METAPHYSICS’. You say: "So, according to metaphysics, there is no God or Goddess other than ourselves." But again, why address philosophy without establishing a basis, a material world basis? Why address White Supremacy (White Male Supremacy) and knock down the Black male presence by saying that ‘at some point in a distant time, there were no male or female, god or goddess, but only the COSMIC MOTHER or EARTH MOTHER?—from which we come’ Why focus on ‘being free’ in a White dominant world whereby the master owns the cotton field, his mansion, your house and your place of business where you hope to have your ‘own’ business that will also be taxed for the benefit of this White dominant government? How does Metaphysics benefit Black freedom in that regard? Free the mind for a moment while we on break then… back to the cotton field? Am I missing something? So lets wipe out the presence of the Black Male by saying that there are no gods and goddesses only White Supremacy and then expect to get free without Black Male Power!? Am I missing something? In order for this BLACK FEMINIST IDEAL to catch on, all Black males will have to be effeminized and I don’t think that is ever going to be a completely successful endeavor because of the historical GODHEAD! LOL. So then, I read on: Identity and change [edit] … Identity is a fundamental metaphysical issue. Metaphysicians investigating identity are tasked with the question of what, exactly, it means for something to be identical to itself, or – more controversially – to something else. … https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysics Ah ah! Now I am getting it! Now, I think I am beginning to understand why the Classical Greeks came up with Metaphysics. Now I think this is all about continuing to keep down the conquered Black material world! OMG! Mind over Body… how to stop the powerful Black man from conquering them… The metaphysical positions one takes on identity have far-reaching implications on issues such as the mind-body problem, personal identity, ethics, and law. The ancient Greeks took extreme positions on the nature of change. … https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysics LOL! Now I am getting it! OMG! This may be the feminist aspect of it of ancient times, in how Black women were used to assist the White world in conquering the Black man! Stop! Wait! Is this what Metaphysics is all about!? Again, for this idea to be accepted as valid, IMO, it would have to be based on a ‘MATERIAL WORLD’, meaning at the very least, THE BODY. So if there is a ‘oneness’ and therefore, no gods or goddesses then, what was ‘the body’ defined as way back when? Will the body be anatomically male, female, intersexed, or parthenogenic-based in the future or what? Since today many people are anatomically male or female, therefore, should we adjust our minds to being female, male, or intersexed and erase gender altogether and then after the BLACK AFRICAN WOMAN gives birth, make a law that allows anatomical BLACK AFRICAN MALES to be STAY-AT-HOME-BEINGS and keep house while the BLACK AFRICAN FEMALE gets back in shape and then goes out to work under the White Supremacist system and bring home the bucks and pay taxes? Or, do we plan to go back to Africa and then think that the African leaders over there will step back and allow us to set up this gender-free society where we all pray to the Cosmic Mother as the godhead or the godhead consciousness that exist but only in our consciousness? How can we ignore the physical body structure of Black African men today? If we effeminize every Black African man under the American citizenship or on this planet, then will the White Supremacist world reward us Conscious Cosmic Mothers? With What? Taxed free businesses that we will be allowed to own? Will we Black women be free from being attacked and enslaved again? But then, if all Black men allow this to happen, in the total effeminization of Black African men, then, they deserve what they get. Identity, sometimes called Numerical Identity, is the relation that a “thing” bears to itself, and which no “thing” bears to anything other than itself (cf. sameness). A modern philosopher who made a lasting impact on the philosophy of identity was Leibniz, whose Law of the Indiscernibility of Identicalsis still in wide use today. It states that if some object x is identical to some object y, then any property that x has, y will have as well. … https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysics LOL! ‘They’ hate Jesus. ‘They’ are so afraid of Jesus! The Anti-Christ. Yes, this seems to be the fanaticism behind metaphysics; PARTHENOGENESIS. I absolutely believe in this mathematical aspect in that ‘any property that x has y also has but for now, a male physical body, in general, is unique, and a woman, in general cannot overpower a man without firepower or etc. In one aspect especially in terms of spirituality and ‘the mind’, all beings are the same, but today, we still have to consider other aspects. Men don’t have wombs. And women do Not have a penis. If Black men have organized to protect your presence as a Black woman, then you should show some respect. Dang. And, if Black women respect you and nurture up your sons and daughters and teach them about your culture and honor you as a man in this mode, then you should show respect and not disrespect them and elevate women of another culture as being better. Geez. In the future, things may change, but for now, to effeminize a malefactor just because he is of African descent with African traits is sad. It is not good for anybody. By weegaweek - File:Feminist philosophy.png, CC0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=72704008 female symbol merged with a question mark One of the symbols of German Women's movement (from the 1970s) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminist_metaphysics

@NubianFellow Yes, maybe guilty but for some reason, not brought through the court systems back then. I wonder why though, but for right now, I am not really interested. I do wonder though about the issue, the very subject is pedophilia, a subject that I feel the courts should have been dealing with way back when! Okay!!!-- This foundation of this government is build on Child Rape!!!!!! Absolutely!!! Absolutely!!! Sounds like it. We have become the poster child for all of the societal ills. You are so on point!!! @Cynique I agree. I don't think so, But I hope it will. Here, I cannot do this sometimes, I get too angry. I am not the kind of person that choose to sit and twiddle my thumbs and wait.... for time.... to change. Lol. funny.

Yes this would be great but under these big governments, what I have seen already is how when certain Black people get going, they soon are approached and completely bought out-- it seems-- by force!!! For example, I remember seeing the hype about FUBU and wondered what it was and then soon, I saw that it was a clothes line that, to my surprise, did become amazingly successful! I couldn't believe it. But, I loved some of the clothes and bought them. Then they became bought out--completely!!! LOL. I couldn't believe it. Then I saw another Black business, a well known restaurant who had soul food and everyone from many cultures came. It was always filled to the max! But then to my surprise, they were bought out! I couldn't believe it. Asian companies bought out both businesses, the FUBU and the restaurant. So, I went to the soul food restaurant that was in the mall, and was seated by Chinese management and the family ran the whole business. Wow! Chinese people selling soul food. What a thought. It's hard for me to grasp. I slowed down from going after I got sick one time. I am not too sure about being served soul food from the workers now, who are all non-black. LOL.

@Delano Another brilliant statement! @NubianFellow Amazing statement-- This is the second time I have heard this statement from a Black man! That is so insane because, even back then, during the campaign--the first campaign for his office, I knew that he would be used to promote the White cause--no matter how he felt about Black people. I think highly of Barack Obama though, but this system is bent on exploiting us for their cause. This system was fixed on making us Black Americans the poster child for homosexuality and therefore, this was the main purpose, IMO for putting Obama in office. My problem with this issue of 'homosexuality' is that it is not the 'whole'!!! The beginning of homosexuality--a long, long, long time ago is PEDOPHILIA!!! So therefore, I always see the dual aspect of this term 'homosexuality. Today, it doesn't matter to me who chooses to be homosexual, but what enrages me is that in the beginning... it was the main tool aimed against BLACK MANHOOD. Period! People got angry with the statement of the Russian leader for also saying this very thing in that the beginning of homosexuality is pedophilia, but this is the truth. This issues cannot be forced upon a grown man or an adult, but it was introduced and put on a child and this is a great evil. Barach Obamas childhood was nurtured under a White Grandfather who was really racist and I just can't get past this point and don't understand how Black America, especially 'the Church' can ignore this point. Stanely Dunham was a rebel in his day and even he had a very troubled childhood. He witnessed trauma in his childhood in reference to his mother who had apparently committed suicide. He and his wife fled to Hawaii from Kansus during the Civil Rights Movement and wanted nothing to do with Black peoples issues, and yet he was the one to raise Obama. Geez. As far as Obama himself, I saw his anguish over Black issues and believe he was fighting for our cause but he was undercut a lot. Scary thought. But yes, seems true unless we today, can go back in time and see how things were set up and continued on and on for thousands of years.

LOL! I love Delano! LOL. It was funny. But @Pioneer1 knows I love him too.

@NubianFellow Did you make this decision after you voted for Barack Obama in the 2nd term? In his 2nd term, I think his slogan was CHANGE and it had to do with this homosexual (pedophile) law and he made this clear well before people went to the polls to vote. Because I take this pedophilia issue hard, I do Not understand how Black people could have not seen this issue. It just does not make any sense to me. I kind of remember Chris Rock saying something about this and then he was shut down. But Barack's mother, Stanley, let him be raised up by her father, Stanley, a White man! She was not around but lived, I think, in Indonesia with another husband. Barack did not know his African-Kenyan father. So, I do not understand how Black people cannot see that he was selected to put in this homosexual law due to his upbringing. Maybe for White people, the homosexual-pedophilia issue is okay, but are beginning in this government is based on CHILD RAPE, and little Black boys 'maleness' was comprimised!!! I just don't understand how Black people accepted this. It's baffling to me. LOL! true! You're right, 'religious beliefs' and 'Integration' is a flaw that is NOT apart of ancient script. The 'Black Jesus' had nothing to do with the Romans, but some of them came up to him. We have been deceived and need to go back and find out the truth. We will continue to be confused about this historical religions if we don't consider the global aspect and the origins of these cultures over hear in Western Civilization. It is a low level of thinking that will continue to be used against us if we are not educated properly. Most of the world, even today, still operates under these religions under a different understanding and the Western World cannot get rid of them like they have done over here. We've been lied to and confused. The Arabs are NOT the beginning of the Muslim religion but that is what Malcolm was made to falsely believe and it led to a big fallout over here in America. Those Islamic warriors over there in the east world did not form with the ARabs, but they formed amongst themselves, meaning Negroes. The Hebrew Israelites and the Islamic warriors and the Muslims formed and eventually the ARabs became apart of some of their formations by and by... we've been mis-educated over here. Those religions and other ancient religions are still the basis for many people all around the globe, and they will not discard their relgion for the western world. It's not going to happen.

Ugh... @Pioneer1 Thank you for taking the time to respond. I appreciate your comments. But I think the problem I am having on this topic may also be personal too because of some of the bitter situations tht I have experienced too and so, I think I have heard a different perspective than you have. And also, I don't see myself nor you as being immune to White Supremacy. Pioneer, you don't think that you have had this problem? I believe we all have had this issue. I may be wrong, but I just don't believe that @Mel Hopkins statements equates to her being what you have concluded. At any rate, I think that we as humans in general, have been conditioned and manipulated by big government in so many ways, it's not easy to make any conclusions on others. It also seems obvious to me that you don't understand why I keep bringing up the media hype about the late Areath Franklins funeral and the reaction of that Black man (pastor) in relation to this subject. But maybe if a flip it, you may understand. PIoneer, what if there was an ALL WHITE or predominantly White funeral and a BLack girl was in the place of Arianne Grande. What if that Black girl wore a mini skirt and was asked to perform a song at this funeral; and then what if a White man (pastor) grabbed this Black girl wearing a mini-skirt, around the waist and pulled her close to him and massaged the sides of her breast and speak on the mic of how happy he was to have her be there in an audience of a bunch of White females, older and younger; Pioneer, do you believe the White women would be quiet about this kind of reaction? Do you think that kind of reaction from a White man would be acceptable to his White peers? You said that you didn't have a problem with it, but I think that your reaction shows, a White Superiority complex that you may not recognize. If a White young woman wore a mini skirt at a formal affair that is predominantly White, surely, she make get some negative remarks from some women, but the atmosphere would be different if the girl was BLack and no White man would justify it. Also, if a young Black girl wore a mini skirt at ARetha Franklins funeral at the podium, surely she might get some negative remarks from Black women, but the atmosphere is different, IMO, because Ms. Grande is White, nevertheless, you as a man are justifying it. Again, no White man would refute White women if they rejected a sleezy dressed Black girl at a formal White event. Black men, in the past have done this commonly; they oppress Black women but allow other kinds of women to have lower standards with in the Black culture. That is White Superiority expressed in the Black world. Yes, we as African Americans have this problem, both genders. Again, he is the best man for her; that is what I heard. And here, you have repeated this statement and I agree that this is a problem amongst us, and it's good to know that you would not do this. As for me, I have heard of some horror stories about Black women being raped and etc. by Black men and therefore, I cannot judge another person because, I believe that this system is the bigger problem starting back to the slave yard where this kind of behavior was encouraged. Oh Hell no... Here we go ... You are completely wrong here. I worked round several foreign women from the Middle East, and this is NOT true. They are very oppressed by this kind of behavior that you describe that should be acceptable. @Delano I love it! You are brilliant!

This is so true. @Troy Watching Now! Thanks for posting! I sure to love to watch these kind of programs. You're right, I have boycotted TV but not only because of some of the shows but because of other reasons too. I do wish I could get some of the progrmas today featured on cable, but cannot afford it right now. Absolutely. me too. LOL. Sad but true.

But I believe that you are 'one-sided' here. Mel is NOT White, and therefore, her assessment as a Black woman can absolutely be trusted! LOL. Her interactions with White people and Black people and her experiences are a part of what is going on in this world today. You believe that she 'worships White men' and my problem with this is that you are using her personal experiences to make conclusions on a very wide subject. White Supremacy is real, and Black support of this issue is also real, but your comments based off of her experiences that she is sharing is what I am addressing. I can understand if you were to say, that her statements seem like 'this or that', but you are being judgmental of one person's experience. That is wrong. And because you are dong this, I am choosing to turn the tables on you, so that maybe you can understand my problem with your approach. So, I am using your reaction the media attention on that Black man, pastor, about Arriane Grande. @Pioneer1 You did not see anything wrong with that man's reaction, but yet, you are so judgmental against Black women in what they wear. That is a red flad, but you can't see it. Also, I brought out in this very thread, a story about Black young men dating non-Black girls for the Prom and neither you nor @Troy even paused!!! This is common here in America and goes all the way back, decades, to when I was in high school too. All of the popular guys took non-Black girls to the Prom and many of the popular Black girls did not go to the Prom because they had no dates! That is WHITE SUPREMACY! we all have issues here, both Black men and women and this is a conditioning, and a governmental issue. We all come to terms with issues about our government from different perspectives. What seems like worshiping White people might seem true to you, but it may not be that at all, regarding individuals. So, to form your opinions on an individual is not going to help the reality of White Supremacy at all. If every body Black only married Black people and if every body White only married White people, then that IMO would be a bigger problem. Interracial unions are beneficial to some extent but understanding where the line is drawn where it can be detrimential is the problem. But picking on an individual for choices they have taken is not going to solve the problem. I think it is important though, to here you views, but to attack someone you don't even know, does not help, but takes away from the conversation. That is what I believe. I understand that, in the bigger scheme, this is a problem. But when some Black women have been abused by Black men, and then are treated better by other kinds of men, then you are not hearing that part of it. You are not mirrorring the situation properly. We as Black people came to be in America where the White man has gotten the upper hand. So, if Black men are conditioned to be 'the Buck' on the slaveyard and are rewarded for raping Black girls, then it may be that some Black women come to hate Black men and see the White master as the top. This issue lingers. I don't understand how you can't see this as part of the problem too. If a White man comes along and builds a relationship with a Black girl who has been abused by Black men, then how can you not see this dynamic. White Supremacy is a big issue, and to pinpoint one persons' experience as the basis to say they are wrong for what ever reason is not going to help the cause at all. But too discuss other avenues may be a better way for us to grow as Americans altogether.

@Pioneer1 The Mormon Movement and the Amish Movement are based on Religious conflicts out of Europe but they are relatively new movements that does show male dominance over younger women, but the wider more powerful White systems still operate under a Matriarchal System.

@Troy Really!? How so? I do not understand how having knowledge can be dangerous. Can you give an example. Also, I don't remember your caustion towards me. Now, this is crazy, especially regarding the very definition of Quantum Mechanics and theory. Why you even try to stop something that even you cannot explain, either way. Scientist theorize about this subject to a great extent, so how can you know for sure? As far as Xray in comparison to cell phone cameras, I don't know. NOt makeing comparisons, but regarding Xrays, this is amazing to me, because a picture is taken and then it is your skeleton that is clearly seen on a film. I have no idea if that has any relation to Quantum Mechanics but, that is just what I think about when this subject comes up. Yes! Cells and then atoms which are small dimensions and then electrons, protons and etc.; What a concept. I did not do very well in chemistry! But I am trying to understand because there is so much science in these small dimensions that scientist use today. That is interesting what you wrote about 'Fasting' and how it helps cells. Wow. I don't know how it works. But I will look into it. Thanks. @Pioneer1 LOL. That sounds kind of true! Some say that women mature at a faster rate than men. Oh No! I don't thinks so, @Pioneer1. NOt historically at all! For now, I am not quoting any sources but from what my memory tells me, the ancient Matriarchal Systems prove what you say to be completely wrong, when it comes to White people. It is only a recent conflict though, in which some White men have taken the lead and become dominant. White men, even if they are dominant still worship White women as being THE QUEEN BEE.

@Mel Hopkins Thank you. Exotic Matter... That is so amazing! And another concept I was thinking about on this subject-- You know, when I go to the doctor to get an XRAY!!!??? I am wondering if there is a connection to this subject too, even though I know that there is today, no answer, but the explanation that you wrote is amazing. I can't wait to share it with some 'thinkers'! You know, when you go to get an xray, you are told to stand on one side of a room, and then hold your breath; then the tech takes a pic, somehow, and within seconds, their it is!!!-- a picture of your skeleton on a film! ... and then what about 'cameras too? ... a dark rooms where films were developed.... I think that there is so much more to know in this world...

Yes, this is bothering me too. I heard the late Dr. Francis Cress Welsing spoke out against the movie 12 Years a Slave along these same lines though. She really impressed me in how she spoke about how they set up Black actresses and actors and then praise them for certain kinds of demeaning roles. And it seems like to me that all of a sudden around a certin recent time, all of these slave type back-in-the-day movies began to be produced. So, I became un-interested in them and have not seen most of them especially when I heard certain comments about them. I did see The Help and I did not like it at all. Those days cannot be glamorized imo, no matter who plays those roles.

@Pioneer1 LOL! Oh but still, will you please answer the question? Because if you are going to keep saying this about Mel, then I want to know your response to this one, because it would be 'WORSE' if you don't see or recognize the hiprocracy here. You did not see anything wrong with that Black man's behavior in a Black Church community dressed like she was going to a bar. But, on the other hand, Black men want to control Black women in what they wear and how they style their hair. Well, I appreciate this comment. NO, it wasn't me, but it struck in a personal way. When you feel that it is right to confront Black women who date White men as 'a blow to the Black cultural structure', then how can you sit there and tell me you don't see this kind of evil behavior of Black men, college boys or not, who 'rape' black girls as NOT being detrimental to the 'BLACK CAUSE'!? Come on, @Pioneer1

@Troy "Your husband let you get away with this?" Patriarchal Society -- I will not submit to, NOT TODAY! LOL. Yes, I can see he was 'a grown man' at some point after high school... and well, for BLACK BOYS, I get the sense that they are generally grown even before this point -- when it comes to how they regard 'women'. But, not in any other society IMO!!! I only watch a piece of one popular show years ago, called something like 'Bachelors' and in a episode, the mother was a part of the choosing, and the guy somehow changed his mind from his first choice and went with the mother's choice for his girl. And, most of my East Indian co-workers told me that in their cultures, the mother is respected in how their son's date and choose their mates. As for me, no, I don't get involved but if a young girl comes to me and complains about my sons behavior and I feel that he is in the wrong, I will speak up. As for my husband, there is nothing tht I do that I don't discuss or hash it out with him, when it comes to our sons. "respecting Black men" or Black men who respect Black women? Do Black men respect BLack women? Do White men respect their women? My first story was about my son choosing a prom date and I thought I brought out a point in that most of the popular Black guys in his high school chose non-Black girls from Prom dates! But you don't understand my point!? WOW. My second story was about my son in a group and he was the only BLack and I was told that he was in a sense, 'to harsh' and when I asked him to respond, he initially said, "no." But later, when he finally did call the girl, he found that I was right. I had hoped that the message from this story would show the important role that A MOTHER PLAYS in how men regard women, and especially BLACK MOTHERS. My third story was how a Black man completely disrespected a Black girl. "MORE CONTROLING and MORE DISRESPECTFUL than what that White man acting as principle did to you in highschool." The White principal announced over the intercome that no one was allowed to wear rollers to school, and you think that is worse than a BLack man saying this about Black women wearing weaves? So let me ask you this then @Pioneer1 Have you ever heard of a White man or principal getting on the mic and announcing that "No one is allowed to bring HAIR SPRAY to school? or, what about this; Do you hear White men speaking out against White women wearing hair weaves, and bufont--hairsprayed hair styles? I will answer too; No, they never would disrespect or control White women like that.

@Pioneer1 I have 3 Short stories: #1 -- I choose to share this account about a Black man that did me wrong because it has other messages within it. Back when my son was in high school and on one occasion, I told him that every time I saw him, he was being followed by this one young Black girl, ‘Brenda Doe’ and, he told me that his frat brothers pretty much told him the same thing. But, ‘long story short’, he took my observation to the extreme. Fast forward to the time of the prom. Months before the prom, tickets were sold and one day, I casually asked my son did he plan to go, and he said yes. So, I asked him who he plan to ask and later, I saw that this young girl looked White. So, I asked him what was his problem; “You are like, a stud, in your high school, and you can’t find a Black girl to take to the Prom?’ What happened to Brenda Doe? Then he said to me, as he sat in the back of our car, “Mom, I just cannot take her to the prom.” And he seemed stressed when he said this. But I pushed farther, and asked him, “Why not!?” Then he said that his frat brothers did not approve of her at all. He went on to say that his frat brothers definitely approved of the White girl and that they too were going with ‘other non-Black girls’. And some of them were not going to their prom. And when he said this, I was quiet for a moment as I was driving. Then I asked him, “Aren’t all of your frats Black? Aren’t all their mothers Black too!? He said, “Yes.” So, now because of his frats, he was ashamed to take Brenda Doe. I said, “Brenda has a crush on you, and you used to hang out with her and others in a group, going out on the weekends to the movies and stuff, and now, you don’t want to take her to the prom?” … Finally, I said to him, “Well, that’s okay, but try to find another Black girl then. You guys are a minority in this high school and yet, all of the other popular Black guys are going to the Prom with White girls, but you will not be amongst them.” … And then there was, Senior Night, when he needed me to drop him off at the band room and before he got out, I gave him some advice due to the attention that he was receiving from girls. So, before my son got out of our vehicle, I told my son that when young girls regard men, they don’t initially care about color, however, they will compete for the attention of the top guys and you are in that category obviously. I also told him, too, not to ignore the bigger picture though. You go to a prestigious high school that is predominantly White, and because you are the first Black drum major ever to be chosen, therefore, you are getting a lot of attention from many directions, from adult teachers and staff and from the kids. However, don’t forget your culture. I don’t have any problem with all of the attention that you are getting from the young White girls but make sure that you notice the Black girls too. So, then, my son got out of the vehicle and reached in to grab his long, black P-coat and threw it over his shoulder and then he grabbed his fancy black felt fedora and propped it on his head. This was part of his outfit he would wear to lead his band in for half-time and for Senior night, and so, he turned to walk away. And, just as soon as he began to walk towards the band door, three young White girls came running. Two of the girls leaped and he bent down and grabbed the both of them and swung them around and they hugged him and giggled. Then, he grabbed the other one and hugged her too. Then as I was backing out, I saw that he walked away over to an angle towards the side door. He was walking in the direction of a group of young Black girls standing by the side door and they stood still for a while. … I started laughing because I knew what was going to happen. Just when he got closer to them, they started squealing and cheering and jumping . . . and when he got up to the group, their arms when up around his neck and they were hugging my son. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________ #2 This is another story about my son. Fast forward years later when after he graduated from college and after he had ridden his bike across America that summer from California back to Washington D.C. with a group of colleagues. I prayed the whole time during that summer of 2013 because it was during the trial of Trayvon Martin and he was the only Black one in the group. I didn’t want him to go but, he was too dominant and insisted on going, so I agreed but reluctantly. Later too, he had some regrets and spoke of some of the tension that he felt amongst the group but all in all, he felt that it was a successful endeavor. I attended the dinner party with other parents to watch the video of some of their journey and my son brought a date, a beautiful young Black girl that he had met in some prior affair at Howard University. But at the Dinner Party, I seemed to sense that one of the two White girls that were a part of this bike group was fixated on my son. Her parents seemed to be following me around the room and her father was a bit blunt. Some of his comments could have been taken as ‘racist’ but it didn’t bother me as I am from the north and accustomed to that kind of behavior. For instance, he asked me if my son played basketball. The Black girl stayed near to me and sat down beside me when the video was played. Soon, my son left briefly to driver her back to her campus and while he was gone, the young White girl eased up beside me and I sensed that she wanted to talk to me. So, I engaged. It turns out that she wanted me to know what my son had done to her. She told me that she started a game of tag while on the journey and well, she said that my son, like the others, played along. And that was pretty much all that she had said, but I read into it deeper. So, a few days after the Dinner party, my son and some of them drove back up to Boston and I gave him a call. I told my son, what this young girl had said to me and he laughed it off. I told him that she seemed upset and insinuated that he was a little to rough in this ‘tag game’ and he immediately got angry with me and told me ‘no way’. So, my son and I went some rounds. I told him that I could tell that she had a crush on him and that she was sensitive, and I asked him to give her a call. And he again said, “no way”. But I insisted. I told him, that you don’t know girls like I do. It may seem small to you, but to females, they read much more into certain situations more than what you may realize. You may be right about the ‘tag game’ being insignificant but, because she likes you, in her mind, she may feel that you regarded her as ‘one of the boys’. Girls will blow up the simplest issues, --you’d be surprised. So, I am asking that you give her a call and make sure that all is well, and apologize to her if she feels that you disregarded her feelings or offended her. And again, he said, “Mom, I am NOT going to call that girl!” But I was relentless. I told him you must! “Don’t keep disrespecting me!” … smh! . . . Finally, months later, my son casually brought out that incident over the phone. And he said to me, “Uh, Mom, I listened to you and I did call ‘Jane’ and, Uh, you were right. She did think that I shoved her too hard. And, Uh, she did have a crush on me.” _______________________________________________________________________________________________________ #3 This is an account that should answer to all three of your questions, but then, if this is not enough, I have more… *smile* BATHSHEBA GIRL. This is what I call one of my younger sisters. She is a natural beauty, dark toned and her skin is so glowing that without makeup, people mistake her for wearing it. She has always been shy in public and my mother caused her to be anti-social. She has given me a hard time, but as the older sister, I became more dominant and, unlike her who had also been shy in public, I broke out of my shell eventually. But, she never did. So, after I went to college, one day, I came home and insisted that she go to her high school prom. But she refused continually until I agreed to go with her. She did not have a date, but I still insisted that she go, so I dolled her up in one of my dresses and out we went. Ultimately, she hated the experience, but nevertheless, she got a lot of attention, and was asked to dance continually. Fast forward to another time, I insisted that she go to the beach with me one summer, and again, she resisted. But I insisted. So, she wore a dark-red bathing suit and her naturally, long, intense-Black hair draped over her shoulders as she sat on the beach blanket. Her hair is thick, but it does NOT ‘fro’ [ie afro] and she has large dove shaped eyes that are slightly slanted upwards. But there she sat on the blanket and refused to get up and walk the boardwalk with me. But I felt good because at least, I got her to go out. Eventually, I got up for a little bit, and told her I was going to the bathroom and would be right back, however, before I returned, there was drama. The Bathhouse was just a little ways off from where my sister sat but while I was inside, I heard a commotion. I heard some Chinese guys yelling. Then I came out and started walking back towards my sister. On my right side was the railing on the boardwalk that I was on and on my left side was some benches and beyond that the tall hotel buildings and some cafes in-between. Behind me as I was walking, I could hear the commotion start up again and I looked over my right shoulder and I saw a couple of Chinese guys yelling and waving each other to hurry. Then, I thought, “Oh no! -- they are going to approach me!” Then they were laughing and started running and two of them had fancy cameras dangling around their neck. One of them came bursting out of the bathhouse and he ran fast, while pulling up his beach shorts. Then they all shot past me!—LOL … They all ran past me and leaped over the rails . . . hit the sand and kept running in the direction of my sister. When they reached her, they were breathless and laughing and bending over trying to catch their breath. Lol. I remained on the boardwalk and leaned on the rail to watch. They asked her could they take pictures of her and she calmly smiled and said yes. … Two of them gave her their business cards and asked for her phone number and invited her to ballroom dancing. Eventually, they realized I was there… in the background… LOL and asked to take pictures of me too. But now, this story will take a dark turn as I bring in the account of the Black man… I began to realize that my mother had a hard time with me because I looked like my father of whom she hated, but I also began to realize that she was simply careless with her daughters as a whole. On numerous occasions, I confronted her about allowing my sisters to date without even asking about the guys. But, eventually, my mother turned against me and this made my relationship with my sisters become strained overtime. After I got married, my mother became angry because she wanted to control my marriage and when I refused, she decided to exploit my younger sister, the Bathsheba girl, in order to hurt me. She urged my sister to call up this guy and they began to date… AGAIN!!! Why do I say, ‘again’—there is a back story to this guy who my sister met in college and I caused her to stop the relationship with him; At one point, my mother enrolled Bathsheba girl into VSU (Virginia State University) an HBCU and I was already attending NSU (Norfolk State University), another HBCU. My sister hated that school and begged my mother not to enroll her there but to no avail. One day, I came home for the weekend and saw that my sister was getting ready for a date. I freaked and confronted my mother about the situation and wanted to know why she would allow my sister to just be picked up by some college guy without him even coming into the house. But my mother did not see anything wrong, in fact, she left to go to her social outing and left me there as I was cooking dinner for my other younger sister. I could see that Bathsheba girl was afraid to go on this date, so I told her that I was going to come up with a plan to rescue her if she wanted out. She told me where they were going—to his apartment but she said he had said that he had roommates and they were not going to stay there but he was supposed to take her out to dinner. I knew that it would take him about thirty minutes to get there and I knew where he lived. So, I told her to give me his phone number and address and I would call. Then I said, “when I call, if you say ‘YES, YES’, twice, then I will know that you want me to come and get you”. So, the guy came, and she went outside and got in his car and he drove off. I couldn’t believe it. But exactly thirty minutes later, I called, and she answered. Then I asked her did she wanted me to come and get her, and to my surprise, she said, “YES, YES”! I was in disbelief. So I asked her again, and she again said, “YES, YES”. So I started panting, sweating… out the door I ran… I drove over there, stressed out of my mind. I parked my car, got out and ran up the stairs. I didn’t knock, but tried the door handle and it opened… There my sister sat on the couch in the dark. I quietly waved to her to come and she got up and left and we went down the stairs, got in the car and left. She later told me that he never intended to take her to dinner. He brought her over to his apartment of which had no electricity and he beckoned her to come back to his bedroom. But she refused. So he was in the bedroom when I came to get her. Now this story will take another dive… Now moving forward to when I was married, and my mother urged my sister to call this very guy up years after I had rescued her from him. My sister was still a complete virgin. But because my mother wanted her to get married, she called this guy up and she began to date him. I found out one weekend when I came home to visit, and I asked my mother where was Bathsheba. She told me that she had rented a car for her to drive up DC to visit this guy… I freaked. I said, “You rented her a car!?” Then I said, “Mom, do you know how that looks!?” But, my mother ‘blew me off’. She complained that she was afraid that her daughter would not get married. Then, I remembered that she did the same thing to me!!! LOL. Then I said, “Mom, don’t you believe in a Higher Power!?” And she responded, “Sometimes, I just don’t know”… Well, I was spellbound. I backed away out of the kitchen quietly. But fast forward… a few months later, my sister was married to this Black man. My mother thought he was perfect. He was tall, and a very handsome fair skinned Black man, who had already served in the air force. … Fast forward to about sixth months later, after I had a nightmarish vision about my sister, surprisingly, in the wee hours of that very morning, I got a call from my sister, the Bathsheba girl and she asked me to come and get her. So I woke up my husband and out the door we went early that morning and we drove about four hours to DC. We walked into his apartment and after a few minutes, my sister packed up her belongings, got in our car and I drove her back home to my Mom. When I walked in the house, my other baby sister looked like she saw a ghost. She quietly asked me to come back to her room. She then told me that my mother asked her to keep this secret for the past six months, but she said that she could not bare to keep it anymore. She told me that on the morning after her honeymoon, and after they consummated the marriage, that guy told my sister, BATHSHEBA GIRL that he had HERPES. My sister was a complete virgin and that was the first date that she had ever been on! When after she broke the news to my mother, six months ago, my mother told her to stay in the marriage and so, they kept this secret from me. I couldn’t believe it! I stormed out of the bedroom, past my husband and the Bathsheba girl sitting in the living room and found my mother in the kitchen, hiding behind the cabinet. I demanded some answers. My sister wanted to come home but, my mother wanted her to stay in the marriage, I started yelling…No!!! What is wrong with you! … She belongs here. At any rate, I can give more stories about the wonderful, powerful, BLACK MAN in how they have honored BLACK WOMEN. Smh. I can tell you stories about me too, in how other Black men have ‘done me wrong’… but I felt that this story, sort of, tops the list.