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Lovely prose, @Mel Hopkins and thank you. your posts as you know I like to read, very informative.

I will limit the number of mailings, designed solely for authors, publishers, and book promoters to just one per month. The goal is to help this specialized audience learn how to take advantage of AALBC.com's platform and to provide insight on how to take advantage of the web in general. This will also allow me to remove content designed strictly for authors and publishers from our regular eNewsletter. . Email* First Name Last Name City State Country

thanks @TroyImagine if we can get aalbc to grow more:) wouldn't that be great @Mel Hopkins as the online black community, this should be our goal, to make a black owned website more popular:) Ok Mel:) private message me on here, we will work something out. I will say this, the promote or social share is not present on blogs and i think is not needed. let us be honest. more and more online people, spend their time with photo viewing or tweeting but very few of them spend alot of time with in depth looking at any level. So, social promotion is good but in the end of the day, we have to come up with ways to engender them to us. many people today have filters to their social experience that grooms it.

Thank you @richardmurray - I'm writing right now too - maybe we can come up with something together. Hold off for now and finish your book. I'll send you a message to check with you on your schedule. I know what it's like to juggle so many projects.

@Pioneer1 Yes, I believe EVERYONE is born with strengths and talents. Mine is being able to recognize those strengths and talents in others. We all have our reasons why we seek out the people we find in life. Maybe you seek out people who are lost to help them. Or maybe you seek out "average" people to exploit their vulnerabilities. We all operate on a wavelength that keeps us comfortable and allows us to achieve our internal and external goals. So If I am out of touch, it's a place I choose to be- because I will never seek mediocrity. It's my intention to look up to people. My comfort zone IS intellectual discomfort. I don't ever want to be the smartest one in the room (or in this case on the discussion board.) I seek out people who share wisdom. The definition of wisdom is "knowledge into action". Aside: Here, I learn so much from @Cynique Her words, wisdom and life story are proof positive that black women can rise above any barrier set for us in any era. I hang on every word that she writes because her eloquence in relating her experience is a treasure... You may not know this but it's not @Troy 's academic degrees that make him wise...(whether he exercises it daily -<snark>) - he has complete mind-body control ... Ask Troy about his days as a champion gymnast and swimmer. Whatever Troy puts his mind to he accomplishes... He could actually write the book on "how to operate your earth suit". @Del 's world (and multi-dimensional) view is enough for me to run to the board whenever I see his name pop up. I want to know what he is revealed because I'm sure it will trigger my Aether experience. I can then be reminded that the reality of this world isn't all there is to life. @richardmurray Doesn't comment much on the discussion boards but if you read his works and his profile comments you'll immediately see he exercises his creativity without wondering if it's appreciated. (by the way, yes it is. I marvel out your Je ne sais quoi - you remind me of a world traveler) @harry brown always seems to put into prose highlights of current events that antagonize the black community. I may not like it but I'm challenged by it. And even @Xeon and you Pioneer have the courage to speak the conviction of beliefs without trepidation on this board. Not sure of your waking life since you both hide under the cloak of anonymity here. Still speaking your beliefs is a virtue. But I digress. As you have indicated, since you look for people to prove your point you will find them As long as I look for people to prove my point I will meet them and I do. I don't look for people so I can say "people are average"... I look for people using all their strengths to achieve - so I can move forward with the confidence that anything is possible with this life. I no longer need to see it, though, it's a firmly entrenched belief. The beauty of my life is I've passed on my ability to seek greatness in self and others to my daughters and other young people I have had a chance to mentor. Therefore, I've created a new group of people who seek to find the best in others and in themselves. So, enjoy the world you create while continuing to seek cheer-leading black women and sexual support for black men who choose to wallow in mediocrity. I'll continue to be out of touch and inspire (from the latin word inspirare which means to breathe life into) all the young people I come in contact looking for the best out of life. By the way, my youngest daughter asked her 20-something-year-old-entrepreneurial-no-degree-having-job-creating--six-figure-earning-ready-to-franchise-car repair shops-nationally-friend, if he needed the support of black women (or any woman) to do his thing . He said that's not needed, only the support of the woman he's in a relationship with...and even that's not required. He did say what would make black men great is the support and mentoring of OTHER BLACK MEN. Out of the mouths of babes... Thank goodness he's the future.

I remember once an ex of my partner asked her for money while we were dating. I felt really uncomfortable because it was obvious I was working in an office. While he was underemployed. That same partner also put me up for a few days when I needed it. so I have been in situations where I had more money than my partner and the reverse. I also had a situation where I was visitng my partner. She went to work and I was unemployed. So I cooked dinner and maintained the house. That seems fair. However if one person is making the money and maintaining the home. Their partner is useless. I can't comment about the sex and cheerleading issue. I don't know how common or uncommon my experience is since I don't know the statistical breakdown of the nature of people's relationship. Perhaps women want a man that matches the environment they are in or the one they want to aspire to be a member . We may be using strength , normal and good in very different ways. And sometimes that prevents us from hearing each other. or not. Interesting convo from the sidelines.

@richardmurray, man you replied in less than 24 hours--that is perfectly fine. No one expects an immediate response. On the forums I find the "promote" feature to be a lot better than clicking the social sharing button provided. But I don't know if the feature is available on blogs (I actually don't run one).

That s because no amount of exposition is going to reach some people. I used to be very cryptic. Then I tried to explain fully. I worked with a lack woman accountant and our White Male Supervisior, would ignore her and take her ideas as his own. I verified to her that she was not in fact losing her mind. Actually I don't assume that Pioneer knows where I am coming from or we have such a different mental approach. That it is near impossible to explain things. With Troy I get, unless he starts using statistics then it goes to the dogs. I don't think I have been mansplaing, since I find it asier to communicate ideas to you and Mel. Since the conversations are less combative or ego driven. I am more Neptunian.

SMH and LOL The "Mansplaining" Mel referred to is so right! Men either recycle what you say and feed it back to you as if it's their idea, or they misinterpret what you say because they hear what they want to hear. So many times, i have to correct and remind a guy that what he says is something i already said! On my job, men would unconsciously co-opt my ideas. With Pioneer, he is constantly thanking me for making his argument, an argument he hasn't even articulated and, in fact, has to have Troy translate what he is trying to say. Men also put words into your mouth and respond to something you haven't even said. Also Pioneer obviously thinks that the adjective "strong" only applies to physicality and that the idea of men having strong intellects is something he can't fathom. To me, not realizing this is being a linear thinker, rather than a critical one. i was struck by Troy saying once that he didn't bother to proof read his posts on this board because he figured we'd get what he was talking about.(he' has since greatly improved. ) Del just assumes you know where he's coming from and rarely puts his comments in context. But - we are who we are. I am hyper critical and like to have the last word. Except with Mel. She always makes her point. She is a personable, castrating woman. The male and female brains are wired differently. Therein lies the ongoing conflict. Mars and Venus orbiting each other.

@Troy i apologize for seeing this late:) I am trying to finish some poetry and see matches... time is squeezing me:) @Mel Hopkins I am willing to help you, to be honest, i never saw a promote feature on my blog and i use it more regularly. The only reason i have been inactive recently is i am working on my poetry book and i reformatted what my weekly blog will be and i am preparing that to both of you, a tutorial is great, but perhaps I should start a blog post , and it can be a place where we members can come and learn how to use aalbc blog platform through our debates and I will be willing if i don't know how to help to figure it out aside the query maker?what say you guys?

I'll check it out...

Mel you may actually know the software as well as I do. Much of what I know is HMTL, which is not specific to the feature of the blogging feature of the software. I'm sure @richardmurray, knows the software better than I, as he uses it more. It would take me some time to create the tutorial video, one because they take time, and two I'd actually have to get up to speed on the software and I don't know when I'll be able to do that. What I really need to do is check the vendor's website to see what documentation they have and direct people there. Here is a link to a description of the blogging software: https://invisioncommunity.com/features/apps#blogs

Cynique, the operative word in your last post was "anecdote." Pioneer has a bad habit of taking his personal experiences and extending them to the broader community, indeed it is the way he sees the world. But this is natural, for anecdotes, especially personal ones, are very powerful. If is a good thing Pioneer is open to being in a place where his world view is rejected by others with different beliefs, experiences, and even facts. I respect him for that. @Pioneer1, you have so profoundly mischaracterized what I believe it would be too strenuous to refute what you wrote. I'll just let my previously expressed words do that. I will say however, that @Cynique and @Mel Hopkins's presence here is a prime example of Black women supporting a Black man. You see they, like you, could easily abandon AALBC.com and engage exclusively on the corporate owned social media platforms. This forum only exists because of folks like you. Now I could very easily complain about all the Black women, writers in particular, who benefit directly (read: financially) from the existence and efforts of AALBC.com, but do nothing to support the website. This of course would feed into your narrative and is actually supported by 20 years of my experience and data. Here's the thing, even though I have experience with supporting hundreds of Black women authors over a 20 year period, my experience is still an anecdote. I have absolutely no problem saying that Black female writers, for the most part do not support the website as much as I think they should (IMHO), but it would be wrong for me to use this experience to say that Black women do not support Black men in general. Do you see my point? Further, I also understand way Black female writers do not support the site as much as they should. Part of the reason is that don't know how to do it and why it matters. I also understand the pull of social media. it is so strong many writers have abandoned their own websites in favor of social media. Many Black women are struggling, like me, and don't really have the resources/time/energy to extend to others beyond themselves or their families. Of course there are some Black women who hate to see a Brother succeed and withhold support because they want an AALBC.com to fail, but these women are so small a factor they are not worth considering. That said, I think the letter was an overreaction and ill conceived. Using their reasoning each chapter could easily craft a letter warning travelers to avoid most of Florida, Chicago, New York City, Baltimore, Detroit, New Orleans, Philadelphia, the entire state of Mississippi, etc. I've been to Missouri a few times, mostly for conventions, and once for a family reunion. The have nice library and ball park, but again, I have no trouble avoiding the state--especially if a Black institution says it is not safe. Besides who says they are not ready to fight in Missouri? I'll disparage the letter, but I'm not willing to trash the Black male population of a state because I don't have enough information and I won't judge it on one letter from the NAACP.

This is truth!!! @Troy This!!! When black women can stop marching in the streets begging white society to stop gunning down black men , that's when I'll take "black man bravado" seriously.