Mel Hopkins

@Troy, Did you read my "struggle" blog post? LOL A single woman can't be labeled a cheater because she hasn't taken any vows to uphold anyone's marriage. "homewrecker" , "sideh* " is the extent of the labeling. I have heard that a single woman can be sued for being party to alienation of affection (common law tort) but even that's difficult. It has to be proven love existed in the marriage - and if the husband steps out to date another women then chances are he didn't respect or love his wife enough to maintain their covenant. I'm sure married women cheat too but I have no experience in that arena. I've only been approached by married men. (I didn't see Fences on Broadway or in the theater)

Pioneer Dang, those words contain some strong hate right there... whew! Nope, no agreement here. Ms. Davis looks joyous with unbridled exuberance. Something we rarely see in these posed and photoshopped images of today.

I may not see the marketing but I do see people; this is why I say don't play them/us as victims - poor people make choices and own their choices. They may not be the choices you or I would make but that doesn't mean they're not choosing. I've actually reported on and interview "poor" people when I lived in West Virginia. Impoverished people are very proud people, many are ashamed to take handouts, some are so religious they think handouts are a sin. Being in the trenches with all types of people inspired me to actually go back to service instead of report. That's when I went back to working nonprofit. I worked in the Department of Justice programs as a program specialist working with people who barely had to nickels to rub together and ate their meals at the YWCA soup kitchen. My job at the USDOJ Weed & Seed program was to inform and coax the stakeholders to use the resources we provided. That was the most difficult job - so we figured out impoverished folks wanted a hand up not a handout. We partnered with an organization called SeedTech and brought in a computer classes that I taught. That's when I got their ear and convinced them to participate in the benefits we were offering to assist. Presence makes the difference in the lives of those who are being run over by society. If you're not in the trenches or never been maybe that's why you don't see them. I do. I got my first full view at 15 1/2 years old as a Salvation Army camp counselor-in-training -worked every summer moving up to full counselor during high school years. I never lost sight of the plight of those living below the poverty line.

@Pioneer1 Agreement is not proof. Acceptance is closer to the definition - M-W 1a : the cogency of evidence that compels acceptance by the mind of a truth or a factb : the process or an instance of establishing the validity of a statement especially by derivation from other statements in accordance with principles of reasoning 2 obsolete : experience As I stated an experience can't not be verified. I can search for the Library of Congress because someone said it exists on this plane...I could experience through observation that it exist but as soon as the experience is over so does the LOC. So if you have an understanding of what I'm saying now, then move through the thought process you will have the answer to your question about Akashic records.

No, wordpress is saying it can't be found. boo! @Troy I like Viola's picture - It captures a youthful innocence and joy that seems to be missing from so many photos/selfies today. Anyway, this gadget may appear to be innocent to buyers but I don't like for the reasons I mentioned above... It dumbs down the end-user by interrupting the learning process.

Then we don't disagree. Yes they are...but they have more options. But the wealthy also have other things vying for the attention - I wrote this in a blog based off a discussion created right here. "whose got your ear" Do you know the median income in my town is $45K Do you know within a 5 mile stretch of Fairburn Road - we have 3 supermarkets with one getting ready to join the mix; german company "Lidl" supermarket; going next to chik-fila, we also have 3 standalone retail pharmacies, 1 apothecary, and that's just to name a few... I live in a majority black town with black leadership...We 're not a wealthy suburb but the same is true from the wealthy suburb I just moved from where the median is $131K . @Troy I did grow up in East Flatbush, Brooklyn, so I can tell you there were no malt liquor ads in my neighborhood... but my dad drank a lot of beer I just chose not too... Still don't. I have my own "drug" it's called sugar but even when that gets the best of me I stop. Maybe, I'm anomaly but I'm a media junkie, just not influenced by it. So Troy, I can't say I have seen any outdoor advertising in poor neighborhoods -and I've done quite a few site visits when I work in nonprofit. OMG I just don't see it. I guess that's insight right there. Maybe there' something to be said about how our brains our wired and what we're receiving.

OMG this is a major reason why people are getting dumber every day! [M-W-Definition : 7: not having the capability to process data] Even if we put aside someone having intimate knowledge of us that isn't an intimate partner; even if we put aside not being a mark - - why are we turning our allowing our learning process over to a gadget? Or what about the fact, that if we use these types of gadgets we begin to lose sense of self. No one can tell me what I like to wear... I don't care if no one finds what I wear attractive, if I feel comfortable or it makes me feel good about me, I'm wearing it! No one gets a vote on my existence - yet here's a gadget that encourages me to get opinions from outside strangers. Pro/con this is a perfect gadget for clothing designers/retailers/stylists . But I can't see why they would want to turn over their trade secrets to the competition?

@Troy How can I follow your blog? I follow you but I don't get notification (and yes I did indicate I want email notification) but I'm not getting any notices on site or in my email. I do get the newsletters, so I'm thinking I'm missing something.

@Pioneer1 LOC is only real in your presence. For everyone else who is not present, it's an idea... While it may be real when you visit, once you leave it you cannot prove it exists... Using someone's verification, such as asking directions, and purchasing a plane ticket, that LOC exist is based on trust and faith.

Mel "I'm still not sure I totally understand your answer. To make it clear, I'm asking 2 questions:" "The first is about YOUR experience...." "LOL this made me giggle. I was trying to think how I can verify experience especially since experience is in the moment. " "Mel during your experience, were you able to verify if such a "grand library" or system exists? " ~ @Pioneer1 "Keep in mind, I just agree calling this place where information is stored "Akashic records" because the description has been my experience . " "whether or not you can verify it to me is immaterial." Then whom am I supplying verification? This makes no sense to me. "Have YOU verified the existence of the Akashic Records or some other grand cosmic system of information retrieval?" Who wants to know? Because you mentioned the answer doesn't matter to you. "Then the second question....which is to you or whoever can answer..... Does anyone know a SURE way to access this system?" you can access the "Akashic records" by going to deeper or different levels of consciousness.

@Pioneer1 I have noticed this - - especially when I was flying and would eat certain foods especially in NY/Houston. I think it's due firs and foremost to all the added SUGAR. Next, fish/meat that is genetically engineered or receive genetically modified feed. Shrimp, fish, such as cod, tilapia, salmon it is usually packaged "farm raised" and it's deadly to them and humans. The best fish is "wild caught" but it cost more and can be scarce depending on the supermarket. A lot of packaged foods and breads contain "soy" products which are harmful and HFCS (high fructose corn syrup) - a chemical compound that is used as sweetener but is known to cause liver damage. Oh and again... "SUGAR"!!! I feel like we're in the movie "Constant Gardener" where the poor Africans had to give their consent to be "guinea pigs" for pharmaceutical testing or they wouldn't receive health care or food. @Del DGAS = "Don't give a sh*t" ( until we do.) Exactly! Ignorance is not knowing ( the state or fact of being ignorant : lack of knowledge, education, or awareness _) It's not a bad word. I was ignorant to the ways of nature until I moved to the country. I haven't heard a lot of people argue their ignorance. I've mostly heard people argue their perspective of a topic.

@Troy I am .. My perspective is from years of working with, for and volunteering with disadvantage and impoverished people from in New York, New Jersey, Wheeling, WV and Chicago, IL ... since I was 15 years old. If people believe they have no choice, they've lost hope already which goes back to my original comment. ORIGINAL STATEMENT - "All are pleasurable to me...but if I'm 100 lbs overweight, obviously being serviced by food is a sign there's psychological distress." If someone makes poor food choices something is wrong. The person is in distress and needs tending to... Or they are simply lazy or ignorant - but again those are choices too. @Del This is priceless! I didn't know Turkeys could fly until I lived in Wheeling and saw them take flight in my backyard. Your relative and I suffered from the same affliction; (DGAS) until we did. Ignorance is a choice though

What would be the instance when people don't know they have a choice? Who are these people?

Ohhh! wait that's right! When folks are in agreement they rarely respond. The content has to be provocative and contrarian to get folks riled.

@Troy The answer, like I mentioned earlier, is Choices. I won't join you on the slippery and dangerous slope you are traveling. I'm frustrated that people voted against their own best interests in this last election, but I respect their choice. They still voted their interest - it just was the best interest. Same with transportation and distance...We're talking about inner cities here - transportation is the hallmark of inner cities - if you want to eat healthy you make the effort...it's not like we have sow and reap this year's crop or slaughter a cow or pig By the way, just like with hypnosis, there's no amount of marketing that can make someone do what they're not prone to do. We make choices to satisfy our wants. @Pioneer1 Then how do you explain the world's oldest profession? Don't let them women run game on you... they're quite tricky with that "catching feelings" stuff. LOL I think men confuse emotion with guilt... We women tend to have buyer's remorse or guilt when think about judgment but it only last until the next time we jump into bed with next dude... In fact, a lot of us women talk about throwaway sex - there are just guys you don't care to impress so you have sex to get some... and then there's the men you really like so you take a long time to have sex with you want to get to know him and ... you don't want him to think you're "easy"... If you think a woman has "caught feelings" that's a good sign - she wants you to think "sex" is very special to her.

@Pioneer1 LOL this made me giggle. I was trying to think how I can verify experience especially since experience is in the moment. Well, there is probably a physical location because of vibration but maybe it's a 4th dimensional construct. One that we can access at a certain level of consciousness. Keep in mind, I just agree calling this place where information is stored "Akaschic records" because the description has been my experience . When you look at the etymology of the word, it states it is derived from the Sanskrit word "Akasha" which means aether... As I mentioned in an other thread - that's what I called the place I returned to when I "died". Maybe death is just another level of consciousness; a flat line but a consciousness nonetheless. Here in this animated form we experience delta (change) which allows us to bounce between levels of consciousness. So maybe you can access the "Akashic records" by going to deeper or different levels of consciousness.

@Troy O/T First, I have to state, if one is able to make decisions for themselves and is not incapacitated then we all have the power to make choices and are responsible for our actions. Having said that, I have to put sex and food industries in the same category - . Consumption is based on choice, supply and demand. Malnutrition and starvation are different. I'm not including starvation in this scenario. Malnutrition is preventable in a America and doesn't matter where you live. Prior to this administration there was always assistance to eat well, whether it was through the government or nonprofits. It's not easy but it can be done. I remember growing up, there were some members of my family, one in particular, my 2nd cousin was single with 5 sons. I don't believe she finished high school at the time - but she kept her boys well fed, clothed and roof over their heads. Once when I was hanging out with her (she's about 13 years older than me) her boyfriend visited. He drove my cousins (one of her sons) and I to Sheepshead bay because my 2nd cousin had to go grocery shopping. He bought some food and she had food stamps to buy the rest. This was a regular practice for her. that is until they opened up a big red supermarket in bed-stuy. Then she took her shopping cart, just like her mother and grandmother before her, and walked a distance to purchaseg groceries. Before I left Brooklyn I would go to "Big Red" too because the produce and sales were excellent. No one is trapped in their own neighborhood when it comes to purchasing groceries... yes it's an inconvenience to travel outside your neighborhood to buy food but its doable. Back on topic "Why (black) Men Cheat" @Troy that's my point - if I'm in an intimate relationship - such as marriage there shouldn't be anything to hide. I don't snoop. If a man feels the need to hide something from me. I'd prefer we just not be physically together. It doesn't make sense to live with a stranger. The root of cheating is subterfuge (deception to achieve one's goal) and it takes away the opportunity for the partner involved to make decisions based on good intel. "Why Men Cheat" is simple, they are dishonest and/or can't face the truth of their own desires.

OK but this a little bit funny...

@Troy, I can't rule out if it's the same activity or not without knowledge of either. However, I don't believe there's a world of difference between the two. If someone engages in sexual activity whether it's solo, a commercial pursuit, domestic or casual - there's still a level of intimacy. People say "It's just sex" and while that phrase may be true, I've learned that we humans can turn the most perfunctory behavior into a habit. Also "servicing" comes in many forms to satisfy psychological needs. If we're in an intimate relationship I don't believe our spouses shouldn't be kept in the dark. Case in point, I enjoy cooking for my family and sitting down to eat a great meal with them. I also snack on junk food that has no nutritional value, eat chips in bed when I'm really not hungry. I enjoy going to great restaurants and can easily spend almost $100 on a meal. All are pleasurable to me...but if I'm 100 lbs overweight, obviously being serviced by food is a sign there's psychological distress. With food intake, or lack thereof, there are physical signs so it's difficult to hide this activity from my spouse. If I hide my sex servicing activity (unless it leads to STD or a baby,) from my spouse, then we're not intimate. He's just a roommate and not a very close one at that. By the way, I've never really known any man to hide his masturbation habits from me,. Not really sure what I should read into that lol

@DelanoTowards the end of my post, after I describe what I call conduit thinking, I mentioned that I don't know how to continuously tune into the channel that is supplying me information. Your comment has just pointed me in the direction. Acquiring tunnel vision to channel thinking could be effective. ["Tunnel vision : : extreme narrowness of viewpoint : narrow-mindedness; also : single-minded concentration on one objective. ] Tunnel vision has a negative connotation. As usual, what the powers-that-be frown upon may be the way to secure information from what some mystics call the "Akashic records"

@Delano Would you believe I wrote something on this concept? Once again, I woke up with this idea and I wrote "Time is no respecter of persons" I'm not an expert in any of this - I just write what I "hear"... If feel like reading here is "Whose Got Your Ear which is based on this thread.

@Delano the process of thinking? Or looking for answers? Well I guess that gives you an idea how I think.. If it's thinking to find an answer -I call myself the "obedient scribe" because I'll ask a question and the answer appears - or at least the field of what I'm thinking about gets narrower. That is productive thinking. Thinking to just think is much easier because I just listen. Depending on what level of consciousness, I'm currently residing, I can "hear" . For example, I woke up with a request - "someone" asked me to research the "styles of the decade - and so before I got out of bed I began penning some ideas on the topic. It was surreal even for me - because I have no real interest in discussing fashion but I did it anyway focusing first on the 70s, then the 60s, 80s, and 90s. I even wrote a blog post, "Styles of the Decades | Voices inside My Head" It turned out to be fun and I got a chance to use some old family photos in the post. Here's where it got weird. I got an email on Friday that informed me that on the very same day I began writing the post, Tim Gunn, Project runway, a show I've never ever seen -- gave a talk at the Library of Congress on the topic of fashions in the 70s. In fact, there's an exhibit on disco fashion "Bibliodiscotheque" at the LOC that ended on Saturday. In his taped interview, he said, (paraphrase) "before you can talk about the 70s you must first talk about the revolutionary 60s" ...those were nearly the same words I used in my blog post. All this to say, I believe thinking is a result of being open to any given channel of influence, so to speak... I intuited this concept early on, and I tend to tune into the highest frequency I can perceive. It just so happened that day I dialed to dial into the Library of Congress's frequency. Thank you for today's blog post topic. I'm using this response ...

@Pioneer1 Most likely, but I don't know. He never informed me. At the least, let me know who the women are just in case they'd tried to run up on me. When I was married and my oldest daughter's father " and his wife came to visit our daughter and us; my ex had a fit. In fact, Ex was extremely jealous of my close relationship with him. My daughter's father and I were not and are not sexually involved. So I figured our marriage was closed. I was attracted to other men but I didn't act on it - if I wanted to I would've told my X-husband. It's mutual respect especially for those you love that is the foundation of all relationships. In fact, those are the type of people I associate with closely. I have respect for my daughter's father's wife and she for me, I suppose. She knows I wouldn't do anything with her husband without her consent. He has actually come to visit his daughter (us) with their children and she's remained home. Thinking about now, I realize that I just deal with very mature men and women who have no time for sneaking around. Which brings me to this. It's not about negotiating; it's about informing. The consequences be what they will. No one can tell an adult what they can and can't do. Now if there's a law against adultery on the books in the state that one lives in - then no amount consent will avail. If not, however, then engaging in intimate relationships might help with one's growth.

I study people like kid studies ants and I know we all are batshit crazy yet I overshare with those whom I am intimate. When I don't feel like sharing it's usually because I don't know and I'm in cocooning to find out. I'll withdraw until I understand then I share. It is important to Know ThySelf because if we don't that's when we find ourselves in compromising positions.

@Troy , There's no echo chamber here... We are eclectic personalities bringing our homemade dishes to the party. I can stay away, and when I return there's a whole host of different topics... But one the best things about posting here is even though we all have our own things going on, I feel if I post something everyone would "get it." I don't have to struggle to be understood.