Mel Hopkins

I divorced my ex-husband for being disrespectful, not for an "adulterous" affair. I found out he was having an intimate and sexual relationship with another woman but didn't bother to tell me. If he would have told me he was seeing someone else, it would have given me an opportunity to decide how to proceed. He didn't. His silence took away my choice and also put my life in danger. I believe when you're in an intimate relationship you don't keep secrets from each other. Openness and vulnerability toward each other is the foundation of a great relationship.

@Troy said " I can and will add discussion forum content to the homepage to reflect the conversations that are taking place on these forums " That is a good idea! Maybe if you also add "create your own profile and join in the discussion" this will encourage folks who are looking for a social networking site to participate. The discussion forum, encourages transient traffic. Those visitors aren't necessarily coming to the site because they put in a search term - they're visiting because they have an opinion on the topic and want to express it. If they stay to join the community -even better. As for those visitors who responded "it's just books" that wasn't a put down. I've sent "readers" here... they like books. They just couldn't find the discussion forum. I've noticed that in the past, you've posted discussion topics on twitter - in fact that's how I met @VL Towler she was very vocal in topic - and the link on twitter took the visitors right to the discussion. Well that sucks... I have a facebook page. I have followers (5) not friends. I send my wordpress blog posts to facebook, twitter google etc. I'm able to syndicate my blog posts that way. But my website isn't a social networking site like AALBC. I have subscribers not members (at least not yet.)

That part of the comment was for @CDBurns, - The board merges the comments even if you quote from other posts. haven't noticed a way to keep them separate when responding.

"cheating" is nothing more than an attempt to control the behavior of the spouse. It's a level of cowardice. As in the "cheater" rather sneak around than have a conversation with their partner to change the terms of the initial agreement of a closed marriage. If it weren't - the topic of this discussion would be "why do black wo/men have multiple sex partners?"

Please Please bring this feature back! 1 1/2 years later and I'm still working on my AALBC project but that is one of my findings - you are a missing a chunk of forum dwellers by not attaching the discussion forum to social media. There's an intellectual audience that is simply looking to be social but without an highbrow outlet. (remember that dude who thought he could match wits and decided we were too 'ignorant" lol) But I digress, I like using my profile here and it's only second to twitter... in the rough draft of my AALBC strategic study, I think I included how engaging the profile page could be - but in a way, I was talking out of my butt because it was. I saw what I posted on twitter appeared here back in 2010. When I refer those who are looking for another social network, they respond "it's nothing but books"...and that is how the front page appears when you first visit the sight. The discussion forum/profile/blog pages aren't obvious. Anyway, I wil soon finish because I want you to have it. What's keeping me from finishing is I've been working on my two websites to use as a vehicle for passive income - and what I've learned during my pursuit of growing a valuable website is this: When I "press" your monthly newsletters on theleadstorydotorg... they experience fast growth and are my highest performing content! Also theleadstorydotorg is very popular on baidu.com and the visitors seem to be very interested in aalbc. com. Not the heck sure what the people's republic of china wants with us - but I'm going to keep promoting your site on the leadstory lol Really? Tell me more! Have you tried depop? I've been on almost a week and absolutely love this app although I haven't sold jack! You on the other with new product may kill on this app. https://www.depop.com/mellymelle

Believing is seeing...and it's how we, as magicians or the faithful, manifest what we seek to have in our lives. BUT, while I respect it, I tend not to mess around with optical illusions, especially those involving colors, for this very reason. Its effects is two-fold. On one hand, it seeks to reinforce you can't trust your own mind, since "seeing" is a function of the mind. But at the same time, it teaches you NOT to trust everything your mind reveals... which is a good thing too because "what you believe can kill you"... Since words create images for me; and I score very high on spatial intelligence... I use my other senses such as "feel" (not to be confused with touch, btw) to determine reality

Bravo! We have the power to tell our own stories! The time is now!

@Troy, I don't think lacking ability to concede to another perspective is a function of gender per se, but rather society's expectation put upon men. I also believe "catty" behavior is a function of women too. We will nearly annihilate one another to win the favor of men. My favorite quote is still "Patriarchy isn't men or women but society. We all have the capacity to become caricatures of our selves. BTW, I was around. I don't think Sara and Cynique were catty with each other.. Those arguments were downright eyebrow singeing-edge-snatching vicious. So glad they are over. I missed Cynique's Corner, so I was anxious to read what Cynique has to share. I thought the arguments took away from her content. Same with you three, when you all stopped building and start tearing down, the lessons, the how-to-use the knowledge was lost.

@Cynique it is the earthly male's greatest downfall. They have the most difficult time with -AND- . I see three men who absolutely want to be heard by each other but go about it in the most clumsiest way. I read through all these posts and I didn't see anyone saying anything diametrically opposed to the other...I saw the proverbial blind men and the elephant. And the frustration building from not each seeing exactly from each other's perspective. Still, I do agree with the alpha theory - it's hard to build alliances without having your POV heard and respected in this society. We as a society do tend to follow and form allegiance to the folks who know the most. (Still can't figure out why 45* is in the Oval office) But I digress.

I originally want to re-post here for @Pioneer1 but think my response to @Troy "Can blacks ever be normal" about "astral projection and agreement" can go here too. We didn't say anything that is in disagreement .. I never lost my consciousness. We don't lose our consciousness when we join the THE ALL... We are in agreement until we ARE NOT that is when we individuate. In Astral projection you are still corporeal entity, You're still matter. Your question reflects a value system; a hierarchy. Value systems exist here in this dimension - This is indicative of people who are still attached to material things... We all are attached to matter in this dimension...It is the foundation of the value system. Still it makes it difficult to answer but I'll do my best. Just like you don't believe there's such a thing as race - the same is true in the other dimension. There's no hierarchy. There's no value system in the eternal. What is the value of infinite? But if I had to judge what has served me well, here, it is understanding of energy and its vibration. Also seeing light in the dark. Livings things, even things we don't believe have life are illuminated here in this dimension. If it is made from life or of living that energy remains with it. It is same with people - some people give off more light than others - and while I don't believe what people say I do trust their light. The one thing I'll tell you about leaving this dimension and traveling beyond is this: There was no "bright" light like most people say they see. It is an incredible darkness ( I wrote this part in my novel) like looking into a school at night where those cut-out shapes of Washington and Lincoln, made from black construction paper, are taped to windows. You can see the shapes even though they are pasted to the window in a dark classroom. When you return here... you can see beyond darkness because everything is illuminated to different degrees.

We didn't say anything that is in disagreement. I never lost my consciousness. We don't lose our consciousness when we join the THE ALL... We are in agreement until we ARE NOT that is when we individuate. In Astral projection, you are still corporeal entity, you’re still matter. Your question reflects a value system; a hierarchy. Value systems exist here in this dimension - This is indicative of people who are still attached to material things... We all are attached to matter in this dimension...It is the foundation of the value system. Still it makes it difficult to answer but I'll do my best. Just like you don't believe there's such a thing as race - the same is true in the other dimension. There's no hierarchy. There's no value system in the eternal. What is the value of infinite? But if I had to judge what has served me well, here, it is understanding of energy and its vibration. Also, seeing light in the dark. Livings things, even things we don't believe have life are illuminated here in this dimension. If it is made from life or of living that energy remains with it. It is same with people - some people give off more light than others - and while I don't believe what people say I do trust their light. The one thing I'll tell you about leaving this dimension and traveling beyond is this: There was no "bright" light like most people say they see. It is an incredible darkness (I wrote this part in my novel) like looking into a school at night where those cut-out shapes of Washington and Lincoln, made from black construction paper, are taped to windows. You can see the shapes even though they are pasted to the window in a dark classroom. When you return here... you can see beyond darkness because everything is illuminated to different degrees. I'm going to post this in the spirituality discussion for @Pioneer1

From my experience, there's only agreement in the astral realm - All are in the ALL. It was how I was able to return here. As soon as I voiced "I" want to return "I" have something to do... I individuated from THE ALL.

Absolutely it makes sense! Let me let you in on a secret.. I don't believe anything people say. I do, however, believe they believe it. For example, I don't believe you don't believe I visited another dimension...but I do believe that you rather not believe it because it would force you to lose your grip on this spot and you're doing everything you can to keep your foothold... I get that too - because I'm afraid of losing my grip too. So in a way, skeptics especially natural skeptics allow us, those of us who float between dimensions, an anchor or tether as you mentioned earlier.

bwhahahaha! Straight from a comedy skit... Yes, syntax is our best friend especially in discussions on the internet. So, @Troy what would you convince that people die and return? That is if there "earthsuit" (body) is viable, that is.

I forgot I added AALBC to my warnerbros mediapass list of platforms. When I went to update my profile today, I went to add it, AALBC.com popped up. It's either an already recognized site or I made it one. Warnerbros.mediapass offers videos, photos, news releases on all their upcoming movies - they also host media junket Q & A... I keep active on the site to see if there are any black movies or black actresses I'd like to feature and promote. All this to say, we writers/journalists can also post enterprising stories on our own site and submit to aalbc for possible publication too!

Look at 4 visitors coming here from TheLeadStory.org! One of my favorite links to AALBC from The LeadStory is the AALBC book event widget! Every author with a website should at the very least use the AALBC calendar of literary events widget. It is the one widget that promotes other authors, literary events and keeps one abreast of national literary events throughout the year. I just noticed an upcoming event in Jamaica.

"see" is an interesting way to describe energy - I did "see" too but what "saw" wasn't with my eyes. It was more like "seeing" motion in which all were represented. Yes as @Delano mentioned sort of like the sea of tranquilty that spoke as one. Speaking of which, another thing I brought back with me was the ability to use my sense of "feel"... so I wonder if those claims are more that they are able to "feel" their deceased relatives - Like @Cynique mentioned "Words fail us in this dimension. Agreed. It seems magick and spirituality are connected though. My mom said she saw herself hovering over her body. It was during a time she was grieving for my father. Also it wasn't her first time experiencing a projection . When she was younger she saw a man sitting on the wall in her room She said her own projection scared her and I think she willed herself to never allow it happen again. I have a feeling we can literally do all these things but choose against it. In a way, it makes sense how grieving loved ones can follow the one who preceded them in death. The "Give up the ghost" idiom must have started with this type of transition.

I don't think you are. It feels like you are helping us remember to enrich our own property. For example, would I cut my neighbors grass' and allow my lawn to be overrun? Why would allow my property value to decrease and risk a fine? I wouldn't. I'd take care of my property which in turn helps the neighborhood! There are so many abandoned black-owned website's that we've turned the "black web" into a ghetto. Everyone ran to the suburbs of Twitter, Medium and Facebook. But I digress. Mostly, I've been pressing articles that I like to two of my 3 websites and adding my own commentary. I sometimes share articles and info through twitter. I'm on google plus, twitter and I have 5 followers/likes on my facebook "page" (pages can only communicate with pages). I share my blog posts through those platforms and I post directly on my AALBC profile status because I don't have an aalbc social sharing button. When I wrote the commentary/review for "Severed" I linked to @VL Towler's website and her book on Amazon (I'm finally an amazon associates) ... I share aalbc.com discussions on my websites (melhopkins.com/theleadstory.org) and through twitter. AALBC brings traffic to my site as does other websites. In fact, I really like to see that I get traffic from other independent websites. It encourages me to leave my comments on their websites with my website address. As long as the website and its blog remains active I continue to get referrals. The cool thing is I actually took my melhopkins.com website down for a bit. When I put it up on wordpress.com I noticed I was still getting traffic from those websites! As for as searches, yes, SEO is still the best. TheLeadStory.org which is hosted through wordpress.org still gets the most traffic from google and would you believe the second highest is traffic from baidu (the search engine based in Beijing, Peoples Republic of China) ? Maybe you can tell me why? The LeadStory.org is focused on black media consumption and anything related to black community activism through the arts. Also can you answer why is my traffic higher on wordpress.org hosted website than wordpress.com hosted website? Thank you for reading. You touched on a topic that really excites and interest me.

If I believed there was such a thing as unknowable - ^ THIS would go in that category! I agree because when I was out of my body... I "traveled" with my consciousness. I was "me" traveling to a "place"... I conversed with THE ALL in the space I call the "Aether" ... but that place was not a location.

Thank you for the reminder!!!

@Cynique Poetry! I can absolutely relate to this scenario! It's beautiful and definitely explains some of the activities in my dreams!

@Troy, As a former high-flying flight attendant for 8 years, I learned one thing about death in this dimension - you can be dead as a door nail for hours or until your flight lands and pulls into the gate but as far as the state is concerned you are "alive". Next time you hear of someone being unresponsive but on the way to the hospital ... that means they've left earth as we know it but no one in authority has pronounced them dead. Death here in America is a legal term - but when you give up the ghost that's an esoteric ... Yes, my soul departed my body... when they joined together again I was lying on the street in the arms of an angel who happened to be a nurse... How wild is that? She actually cradled my body and when I returned I heard her say "Come back to me, baby. Come back" The next thing I remember was being in the hospital having an ear reattached, my face sewn up and a doctor talking to my mother and stepfather. It was all surreal but not is surreal is being among the dearly departed... Another reason I know I "eft" is because when I returned I was able to occupy several dimensions and the ability remains. (I say dimensions for a lack of a better definition because really there's no here or there...there's only here and now. I believe so too!

I do as well! I bookmarked the senators's website to follow up. And yes, I think pursuing direct advertising is the best and allow google and amazon to supplement!

Now this is wonderful news! I was reading something today, not sure what but "magical key" was in the text... so, thank you!

That's just it! We are NOT locked into this particular timeline. We choose to be. And yes but it wasn't near... I was a goner but returned. I guess my body was viable enough to inhabit it once again. My experience in eternity was nothing like you described especially "time" because there isn't any. Yes we all remain who we are but there is a oneness so there's no need to individuate in eternity. Or maybe it's not possible while you're in eternity because you are ONE... Some people say my earthly perception of what eternity would be like influenced my experience but it did not. I grew up in the church - fire-brimstone church and when I returned to the ONE it was nothing like preachers talk about - NOTHING... Prior to my death. I was heavily in to magic spells and casting - when I returned, I didn't anymore. I became extremely interested in life , and experiencing it while searching for that feeling - that wholeness, completeness or agreement that I felt when I was in eternity... The weird thing though when I was there, I said I had to go back because I had something to do - and as quickly as I said I had to go back... I was back here.