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Cynique I think i am having an eargasm.

she's am unconscious magician

Thank you, @Cynique ! You've spoken like a true Magus. I also believe we have everything we need. We just have to "see".

It's in the OED. @Troy

Pioneer there's nothing missing in your post. It can be approached by building a self defining community and or self suffucient. Or learning the ability to amass or control resources. Your goal is about giving Black people pride and reason. Its ambitious and if history is a barometer. Ot is likely to get you killed if you have any margin of success. Power doesn't like sharing but does form.allegiances. That you can levrage. In short its about investing in oneself and not branding self. Let me know if you want more detail. And i will share my observations.

i certainly can identify with all of this. I love language, but it is, indeed, a prison. Even so, words can be weapons. The world exists outside the constraints of written symbols and spoken syllables. Sights and sounds are subjective experiences. i especially appreciate conciseness and how brevity is the soul of wit. As i mentioned before, Zen encompasses this esoteric realm. The impact of spaces and pauses, the power of what is not said, the reading between the lines, the awe of silence. There's so much to life that is not spoken. Emotions are a wordless language. Living in the moment can be an eternity of minutes. My daily ritual includes working a patternless crossword puzzle that runs in my daily newspaper. It's me against a totally blank grid. No black squares are included. A list of numbered clues are provided under the headings of Across and Down. You have to fill in the blanks with words that have to be separated from each other by blackening the square/squares between them. In the course of doing this, instead of the grid being my challenger, it gradually become my enabler. i read the clue and stare at the space provided for the answer. Sometimes the clues are easy but the hard ones require that i wrack my brain for an answer. Without fail when the answer is not forthcoming, after staring at length at the blank, the word comes to me, as if it was there all along and i just needed to bring it in focus. And as the completion of the puzzle finally begins to take place, it's like the grid has become my alter ego and together we have brought blank spaces into a completed pattern. it's a very intriguing exercise, one that provides a lot of fufillment because i am always successful in finishing the puzzle Whatever. My take away is that everything we need to know is right before our eyes just awaiting concentration and fruition.

A grimoire is the french word for Grammar and is a book of spells. Meaning definition and will are key components in spell casting. However when communicating i will sometimes post the standard definition and/or etymology of a word. Not so much as to require adherence to a standard but to demontrate difference of meaning or usage. However in magic being technically correct is less important than feeling or will. Mythology is more important than technology or science. Larger groups are shaping and manipulating the collective mythos. This can be seen in advertising and history (which is mythic advertisement/propaganda ). I also feel everone has a personal mythology. There are possibly familial up to global mythologies. I think i half agree. When it comes to non poetic communication then definitions become more important. But only if i care about clarifying an idea. Since ambiguity can be invocative and/or provocative. When it comes to mythology poetry and Magick i agree with your position. Although I don't know about whether we should or should not get hung up on words. If my goal is straight forward communication then I would agree. So after writing this i agree with your statement... sometimes.

You are a Soulunar Magus. You have a dime balance of the archetypical masculine and feminine

No harm in re-thinking things. A flexible mind stretches the intellect. i went back and made minor revisions on what i first wrote. And i now have second thoughts about calling language a "prison". Life as captured by language, and communication through words are what make us uniquely human. My posts are usually drafts that need to be revised and edited because typing them is a mystical spontaneous exercise. i place my hands on the keyword and my fingers connect with my brain and away i go, just putting my thoughts down, and some of the things that pop into my head don't always make sense. i usually have to re-arrange random paragraphs and put them in sequence. "Magus", huh? i don't know what i am, except crazy. I will admit that Pioneer was probably right in saying that he energizes me. But so do all of you; only in a positive way. i feed off what you say. You stimulate my mind.

I changed my mind in the course of writing my response . I appreciate thoughts especially the ones in which I disagree

From hangry to mansplain: spend a little ‘me time’ with the latest OED update The latest update of the Oxford English Dictionary includes more than 1,100 new entries, phrases, and senses from around the alphabet, including a selection of new entries relating to the language of modern parenting. Our Head of US Dictionaries, Katherine Connor Martin, takes a closer look at some of the highlights below. Mansplain Just a decade ago, the verb mansplain did not exist, but the word and the concept (a man’s action of explaining something needlessly, overbearingly, or condescendingly, especially to a woman, in a manner thought to reveal a patronizing or chauvinistic attitude) are now an established part of English-language discourse. The first known usages of the verb and of the related noun mansplaining are in a pair of comments on the social networking website LiveJournal in August 2008; an influential essay on the topic of ‘Men who explain things’ was published by Rebecca Solnit a few months earlier, and is often credited with popularizing the concept, but it did not use the term mansplain.

Thanks for the mansplaintion Del. this was already covered

Everyone is right based on the question. Agreement or disagreement is irrelevant. Everyone can see different problems and not see others because of perspectives and experience. I prefer to be Johnny Ideaseed. Talking about whether race is a relevant topic isnt all that important to me. "Indians are red Niggers" - Ghost Dog. Does your concept of race matter to your oppression , your oppressor or even fellow poster more than their own? Is there a solution to the problem. Yes but because of heterogeneity the solution is probably more individualistic than socialistic. It is interesting that Zaji agreeing with Pioneer has a different reaction than when I did the same. Fascinating. Also you (plural) can say and believe whatever you want. It is eaier to side with Cynique Mel Pioneer or Troy in the main since there's a ideological basis that is consistent. Zaji is writer and the group is interesting material. Juat some observations or are some of them conclusions. I am not certain. Sincerely, Doubtful Delano aka not having very strong convictions or pronouncements. And like i have done earlier I will watch from the sidelines.

Zaji Excellent topic. Delano has seen more of this world than I have so probably he's better qualified to answer your question but let me just say............... I believe based on my observations that with a few exceptions like East Asians....most people of color around the world are doing quite poorly economically speaking. Slavery and colonialism have stripped them of their ORIGINAL KNOWLEDGE and replaced it with Western civilization. Because of this 2 problems have arose: 1. Most communities of color around the world no longer know how to provide the basic necessities for themselves in the amount necessary to sustain themselves independently. 2. Also important is that fact that Western civilization has change the VALUE SYSTEM of people of color around the world so that what they value NOW isn't necessarily what they valued hundreds of years before contact with European powers. You mentioned the monetary system, however TRUE wealth is: Health.....knowledge of medicine and the body Land...to build shelter and grow food Knowledge.....not simply going to a university in a Western country just to get a useless degree and beg for a job with Amazon, but REAL knowledge that allows you to do whatever you need and desire to do. Family.....proper marriage and mating customs that produce harmony between the sexes Money is just a means of exchange, all of the money in the world is useless unless you have secured the above mentioned. People of color need to RE-PRIORITIZE their values and recognize that they have the ability to produce an abundance of REAL WEALTH right where they stand.....and they don't need "money" to do it. All they need is a real desire to re-build their civilizations and break their love affair with Western civilization, then their own creativity will take over. But to answer your question more directly....yes we DO have leverage, especially those of us here in the United States. The United States is in a unique position of being a very wealthy nation but with far fewer financial regulations than most other wealthy nations; which means it's easier for Black people in the United States to accumulate money and play around with it than in most other parts of the world where either they DON'T have the money available to them OR they have it but it's all tied up in red tape and their ability to use their money is restricted.

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo - Yes, @Cynique . This just reminded me that five years ago I would chant every day. I was wondering what was different about my life then but I noticed a lot of things changing. I may have to revisit this practice.

Now I have to be clear in stating that it's the network that's garnered that growth which is still considerable. The funny thing is the primary site that has grown considerably in the network (Housakicks) when I first started working with him he was barely getting 1000 visits per month and he has since crushed my totals at 300K+ per month. My site suffered from my stupidity. I accidentally deleted it and it killed my sitemap and indexing with Google. I finally updated my sitemap and my traffic has started growing again but I'm only up to about 25000 visits per month. The other two sites are about the same. It's taken almost two years to grow the network, but long form content is actually making a big come back. I don't have a video because it hasn't been a straightforward process. It's primarily content. That's it. Combined we write between 20-40 articles per week as a unit. Creating the network has been vital. I could definitely do the same thing with Troy if I worked on CBP enough and you Mel, but the AHN takes up so much of my time and it's the money maker so I stay in that space.

We 3 women here all seem to be on the same page. My inner-narrative is constantly prompting me to exercise my 3rd eye, and to make sure i'm seeing what i'm seeing, and hearing what i'm hearing. The ego can be a capricious filter. Zen is the key to my inner sanctum. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

Troy I can't prove that genetics that shows that there is only one human race. I have neither the equipment, knowledge, or time to prove any of this stuff. If this is the case, then how can you call MY position that there IS more than one race "wrong"? 　 You must rely on what others who are more knowledgeable tell you. .....or do the research and trust your own experience and observations. Which is what Black people should get into a habit of doing.

@Troy Do you honestly think it is good science? The answer is you don't know. But you're less likely to believe me then people who have an agenda. I didn't have an opinion until I looked at the data. Troy thats is my whole point. You should question the data and the methodology. it may take another before climate change is exposed.

I study people like kid studies ants and I know we all are batshit crazy yet I overshare with those whom I am intimate. When I don't feel like sharing it's usually because I don't know and I'm in cocooning to find out. I'll withdraw until I understand then I share. It is important to Know ThySelf because if we don't that's when we find ourselves in compromising positions.

Troy If two people chose to only have sex with each other and actually accomplish it over a lifetime, and it makes them happy--that is great. To expect most humans to enthusiastically embrace and conform to this behavior is woefully naive and unrealistic. Logical, natural, and well said! 　 Del I remember a friend told me i should hook up with a woman who was checking me out. He couldn't comprehend me not sleeping with her. This is a testimony to the OTHER extreme that seems to be pervasive among too many Black males.....atleast when I was coming up. Not only did we have the dominant middle class White society that was sexually immature and somewhat timid who tried to force their morals on sexually confident Black men..... But on the opposite extreme it was part of AfroAmerican male culture...especially among young men....that you were supposed to sleep with ANY woman who showed sexual interest in you! I never did understand the thinking of some brothers. We'd go to a party or a club and the first drunk "hood rat" that smiled at them, they'd jump all over her and take her off into a room somewhere, and later claim he really didn't find her that attractive! Same thing in school, half of the boys lining up to bang that ONE girl who was known as a "freak" for anybody. If you didn't bang every girl who gave you an opportunity to, they'd look at you like you were crazy. According to some of them, you're aren't supposed to turn down ANY coochie! No discretion what so ever. Mel I hear what you're saying about the deception part of cheating. Certainly the lying is wrong and cowardly. However most of these men know that no amount of "re-negotiating" and explaining is going to convince their significant other to OK them having sex with other women, so they figure why even go there. I mean, even if your ex promised to be very considerate and use protection...would you honestly have given him the go ahead with other women? I personally believe the best thing to do if you know you like multiple partners is not even get into a relationship at all. But a lot of relationships today aren't based on love or sex, but one sharing the bills.... A lot of couples rely on eachother just to survive economically, which is another reason why people just go ahead and CHEAT rather than risk breaking up their "business partnership" by being honest. It's also another reason why a lot of women who KNOW their men are cheating on them continue to stay with them....it's a financial decision.

I divorced my ex-husband for being disrespectful, not for an "adulterous" affair. I found out he was having an intimate and sexual relationship with another woman but didn't bother to tell me. If he would have told me he was seeing someone else, it would have given me an opportunity to decide how to proceed. He didn't. His silence took away my choice and also put my life in danger. I believe when you're in an intimate relationship you don't keep secrets from each other. Openness and vulnerability toward each other is the foundation of a great relationship.

It doesn't necessarily follow that monogamy leads to a happy home life. Being polygamous is not the same as cheating. I have known and met people who have open relationships. Otn one instance the adult child was more upset than the partner. What is moral, ethical and good is another debate. I also knew a couple where the woman was a leabian. However that was more of a business situation. Plus she did use sex as a weapon. But he didn't care. I also had a coworker that said certain sex acts her partner should see a prostitute. There's what works and what works for you. They are not always the same. Interesting. Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher had an open relationship. But it broke yp when he hid one his lovers. At that point he was cheating. Its not cheating if the other person knows about your lover.

True, cheating, by definition, is behaving in a way that goes counter to the rules, as in the case with conventional marriage vows. Most "cheaters" I'm aware of don't make much of an effort to cover up their tracks; Bill Clinton, Anthony Weiner, etc. Reapers simply wrote cheating is "fucked up end of discussion." I wonder what she (you know Guest Reaper is a she), believes we should do with cheaters? Should we execute them? Give them a stern talking to? What? Christian ministers cheat and eternal damnation does not seem to deter them. Public humiliation did not seem to bother Bill Clinton. Losing his family, many millions of dollars, and perhaps his career did not stop Tiger Woods.

"cheating" is nothing more than an attempt to control the behavior of the spouse. It's a level of cowardice. As in the "cheater" rather sneak around than have a conversation with their partner to change the terms of the initial agreement of a closed marriage. If it weren't - the topic of this discussion would be "why do black wo/men have multiple sex partners?"

Human sexuality is complex. I'm not sure why people believe humans are monogamous by nature, particularly since NOTHING in our collective behavior suggests that we are. If two people chose to only have sex with each other and actually accomplish it over a lifetime, and it makes them happy--that is great. To expect most humans to enthusiastically embrace and conform to this behavior is woefully naive and unrealistic.

I remember a friend told me i should hook up with a woman who was checking me out. He couldn't comprehend me not sleeping with her.

Troy You asked an excellent question that I've found myself asking many women over the years..especially those who claim to be irreligious. WHO told you monogamy was the "right" thing? As far as I'm concerned it's a matter of preference....choice. Most men are polygamous and prefer multiple parnters. Most women are monogamous and prefer the comfort of a secure single relationship. Harmony comes when both groups respect the desires and preferences of the other and work along those lines. The above book was clearly aimed at women because most men aren't waiting on "Ms Right". Ms Right for them is whoever they find attractive and is willing to sleep with them. It's a shame so many young women are being indoctinated into holding out for some mythical "knight in shining armor" who doesn't exist. I blame Hollywood for this and the fantastic (in the truest definition) standards it seems to set for so many young women. But concerning that book.... It's unrealistic and down right absurd for a couple of wealthy attractive relatively young people to sit back with grins on their faces telling the average man and woman to "wait". You learn about relationships by HAVING them and the trial and error of making mistakes. Telling people to wait for the perfect mate is like telling a young driver's ed student they should wait until the weather is 70 degrees and perfect before being taught how to drive. This sounds like some foolishness they picked up from thier priveledged White friends who have so much money and so many friends they have nothing better to do than play "relationship games"...lol. Lisa Brown I know you're young and fresh to the world so I'm gonna tell you the straight up truth and you can either accept it or reject it...but it you accept it relationships will be much easier and things will make more sense. Men cheat because they like sex with multiple women and if they told you the truth they know you wouldn't sleep with them....so they lie to you. Not all men cheat or have sex with multiple women. Some men are gay, others have a low sex drive where they don't want sex as much. But MOST men do....especially those under 40. That's a biological reality and there's NOTHING wrong with it. The only thing wrong is the MISEDUCATION of most women in this society concerning male biology and psychology. You've been TAUGHT that normal is wrong or bad....so now you must be UN-TAUGHT.

Hi Lisa, one could argue that a strong loving family exists because men cheat. Cheating, in and of itself, does not cause damage to the family structure and illegitimate children. Lack of birth control causes this. As far as arguments and jealousy, getting caught and lack of discretion is usually the culprit. Stating that monogamy is the "right" thing makes assumptions that I'm not willing accept so easily. What makes monogamy right? I don't ask the question lightly: Sapiens have been running around on this planet for about 200K years. When did monogamy become right? If there was a start, when did it happen and who decreed it to be right? Is this a permanent rule? I understand our cultural standards completely, but I can also observe our collective behavior as well. The cultural standard is that people are only supposed to have sex with one other person, of the opposite gender, that we are married to. Again one will argue this is the right thing to do, but I'm not so sure. Given the almost complete failure of anyone to do this should be a clue. Also who says monogamy has to be limited to men?

Cynique, I tend to agree with Pioneer on this one though we may be arriving at the conclusions from a different angle--which in the final analysis makes little difference. Chris Rick famously quipped that men are as faithful as their options. Many men who are "faithful" love their wives and have no intention if breaking up with them. The concept of monogamy is an invention of man. Much the same as the requirement of celibacy for Catholic priets. Because man makes a rule does not make it natural. Besides aren't things that are natural easy to do? It seems to me monogamy is not one of those things.

Black men cheat for the same reason White and Asian men cheat, because they love sex. This isn't rocket science, I'm not sure why there remains so much controversy and scandal around the fact that given the opportunity most people tend to have sex whenever and with whomever they like. It's been this way for thousands of years despite attemps by governments and religious institutions to prevent it. Not to accept certain facts is a testimony to the immaturity of society today regarding their own sexuality and even humanity. Having sex is part of ones nature as a human being. It's a strong biological desire similar to eating and taking a dump. You can control the behavior but you have very little control over the desire, nature put it there for a reason....a very good one. To maintain and continue the human population!! Having sex with someone other than your "main" is no more cheating than a person who regularly eats at Taco Bell occasionally dipping into Burger King, lol. Now, I respect the institution of marriage on the grounds of religious obligation and raising children, other than that....I think it's a henderance in this society that is so open and relatively more liberated sexually than in times past. What you have is a society that is free physically but too many are still bound psychologically to archaic values that they don't completely understand and it produces confusion and disharmony among the populous along with a lot of unnecessary guilt.